[WIP] A Teen Titan's Toilet Troubles - Page 16

Yes, I was going to include something like that, it's not very clear in the wip, I hope it will be clearer in the final version.

No pb!

The framing of these panels doesn't read very clearly. I understand now that it's "Starfire daydreaming" so to speak. Maybe it would be clearer when it's colored if there is a filter over the panel like a blur frame or something?

I see now! Thank you soap!!

SteadyGemini

No problem, I'll make the correction, thanks!

Yes, Star is imagining that, there should be a reflect in Star eye in the first panel and I was planning on adding dream-like effect, glow and stuff like that in the panel where she's dress-up. Sorry for the confusion, I realized after drawing it that it's not really clear, I hope the effects will convey the idea better.

What part of the dialogue? The last panel where is dress-up? I realize it wasn't really the best way I could put that together after drawing it, I was planning to have some dram-like effect on this panel to convey the idea that Star is imagining that.

I think that's a good idea. A dreamlike effect on those panels would definitely help convey what's going on.

You know, I really can't imagine Raven going "EEEEK". It doesn't seem in character for her. I would try and replace that with something else? Maybe "nnooooo"?

It is meant to show Starfire's imagination going wild, I believe. Seeing Raven as a baby before trying to make it happen. I think an effect of some kind on those particular panels would help relay that in the finished page.

I really like it! My only confusion is that the 2nd and 3rd panels with the bonnet/pacifer seems like they would could after the bottom pannels

SteadyGemini

It's still left to right.

Perfection

Wait, I'm confused. Has this turned into right to left like manga? I get that star fire is imagining her dressed like that, but not sure about the dialogue

Feartheoldblood

Looks like it’s gonna be fun

BeastBear5568