STL

Chapter 15: I Will Never Date You!

Added 2025-06-29 21:42:32 +0000 UTC

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I went into my room and checked the time on my smartphone. It wasn't quite bedtime yet. Maybe elementary schoolers would be asleep by nine, but not many college students would be.

Siwoo and I were the same. We had a habit of staying up late studying before college, and we were almost always awake until late at night.

Siwoo was having a hard time for a while after his grandmother passed away, but he was doing okay by the time he entered college.

Siwoo and I, who had become cheerful again, would buy a few cans of beer on our way home from school. We didn't drink every day, but there was always alcohol in the fridge. I don't know if this was a common college student's life, but well, sometimes when we were drinking outside, other students from our department would gather around us, so I guess everyone drank that often.

"......"

What was I doing back then?

What was I doing before I collapsed and went to the hospital?

When I think about it, I was just hanging out with Siwoo.

During the first semester, after listening to lectures, when there were no assignments, I would meet up with Siwoo, other students from the department, or those who were still in Seoul or commuting to college from Seoul, and we would eat something or hang out. Of course, there were many days when I just went home and rested, but that was usually when I was broke from playing or just wanted to rest.

I met Siwoo even more often right after being discharged from the military.

Even if I wanted to hang out with friends, they were all in the military, or they were starting to live near the universities they were attending, so Siwoo was the only friend I could meet.

That's how the words, 'Do you want to live together if I get my own place?' came out.

I lay blankly on the bed, staring at the ceiling, then scratched my head and got up again.

The computer I used to use is still in the room. I bought it almost four years ago. The specs might be a little lacking to run the latest games.

Does Siwoo still play that game?

I sat in the chair and turned on the computer. After waiting a bit, the desktop appeared, and I could see that all the programs I had installed last were still there. The OS, which had been neglected for a long time, immediately started updating, and when I turned on the game, there were a lot of patches piled up.

When I logged into the game, all the nicknames in my friend list were gray. Everyone had hardly logged in recently.

At that moment, my smartphone on the desk vibrated.

[Did you get home okay?]

It was a text from Siwoo.

[I got home okay]

I replied.

After the number next to the message disappeared, there was no reply for a while,

[Did you throw up on the way?]

That question came back.

I chuckled.

[Would I? I told you I'm okay?]

[Then that's a relief]

I thought for a moment and tapped the smartphone screen.

[Wanna see each other tomorrow too?]

But before I pressed the send button, I thought for a moment and deleted it.

Even if we're friends, seeing each other every day is a bit much.

So... wouldn't it be burdensome? I had a feeling it would be. Besides, there were a lot of things that happened today.

I drank and showed a bad side, and I tried to move the location to be considerate of Siwoo, but I ended up in an uncomfortable situation.

If it wasn't for Siwoo, wouldn't the back of my head have been smashed?

"......"

It was a little late to realize, but Siwoo was taller than me after all.

I wondered if I had ever been in that situation before, but even when there were many people, we had hardly ever been so close together. So what happened today was a complete coincidence.

If I had been so close to someone else, how would I have felt? If it was another man taller than me.

Maybe... I wouldn't have liked it very much. If possible, I would have turned my body as much as possible to show my back to that side.

I looked at my hand holding the smartphone and spread my fingers wide.

The size of my hand hasn't changed much, but my fingers have become very thin. Thin and delicate-looking fingers.

Different from Siwoo's hand in many ways.

Siwoo's hand, which grabbed my waist, was bigger than I thought. When I was a man, there was no reason to be conscious of such a thing.

Only I have changed, but it seems to me that everything in this world has changed in that way.

[What are you doing?]

Siwoo suddenly asked that, and I was startled.

After a very brief thought, I realized that there was really no meaning in those words. There was no way Siwoo knew what I looked like now, and I didn't think he would suddenly get angry like this.

[Just sitting in front of the computer without thinking.]

[What are you going to do?]

[I don't know. Game?]

[Wanna play?]

I blinked.

[It's not bedtime yet, right?]

Siwoo asked.

[Not yet]

[Is your head feeling a little better?]

[It's okay now]

[Then wanna play for a bit?]

I stared at the text Siwoo sent.

I thought the situation was a little funny.

No, is it funny?

Seeing that I keep laughing, it probably is.

[Sure]

I sent the title of the game I was logged into.

[I'll be on soon]

As Siwoo said, in less than 3 minutes, Siwoo's nickname in the friend list lit up.

We lightly shared our opinions in the chat, and soon turned on the PC messenger.

Fortunately, the dusty headset worked normally.

[Are you really okay? Is it worth trying a ranked game?]

"You want to play a ranked game right away?"

[Why? Scared?]

Siwoo asked over the headphones. His voice seemed to have a smile in it.

"If we start now, we have to take the placement matches first."

[I haven't played for a long time either, so it's the same for me.]

"It wasn't a situation where you could say anything."

When I said with a laugh, Siwoo was silent for a moment.

To be honest, neither of us is very good at games. We both like games, though. We like comics and anime, so there's no way we would hate games.

However, neither of us is very good. And we don't play often. Neither Siwoo nor I hardly ever play online games unless we're playing with a friend.

We were both stuck in Iron, and after struggling to climb up and enter Bronze, it was midnight.

Siwoo had class tomorrow, so we decided to stop around that time.

I went straight to bed and fell asleep, and when I woke up, it was almost noon the next day.

"Ah... I have to go exercise."

But I don't feel like moving.

One way or another, I was drunk yesterday. If I had just gone to sleep right away, it would have been fine, but I kept playing games with Siwoo until late at night.

I wonder if Siwoo is in class.

As I was blankly staring at the ceiling, my smartphone vibrated again.

Not just once, but twice, three times.

It's a phone call.

I realized that late and picked it up. It was a call from Siwoo.

I just blinked and answered the phone.

"Yeah, what's up?"

"Do you have anything to do today?"

"No... I don't really have anything to do."

"Really? Wanna grab a bite to eat, then?"

"Oh, should we?"

I sat up in bed.

I scratched my head and got up.

"Where today?"

"I'll go to your neighborhood."

Siwoo said coolly, and I stopped moving.

"Isn't it too far?"

"Even if it's far, it's also the neighborhood I used to live in. I want to go there sometimes."

I wondered if that was a word to be considerate of me or not—

"I've already left, so get ready slowly and come out. I'll call you when I get there."

"Oh, okay."

"See you later."

And the phone hung up.

I scratched my head again.

Is there no class today?

I looked at the calendar and it was Friday.

There's no class, or there's only a morning lecture, but it ended early by chance.

"Ah... I see."

Siwoo wasn't particularly angry.

He was looking for me today too, so he was thinking of me as usual.

My head cleared up a bit.

When Siwoo said he was nearby, I went out of the house and saw Siwoo waiting for me at the crosswalk across the street.

Siwoo recognized me from afar and raised one hand high.

Without realizing it, I raised one hand high and waved, but then I felt embarrassed and lowered my hand slightly.

The woman next to me seemed to smile at me. I quickly turned my head and didn't see her expression properly.

"You dressed up?"

I was the only one who raised my hand high and was embarrassed, but for some reason, I felt a little upset and said to Siwoo in a grumbling tone without realizing it.

My words weren't that wrong. The clothes Siwoo wore until just yesterday were mostly hoodies or suitable long-sleeved shirts, just clothes that were close to 'wearing'.

.......

Ah.

I think I understand my younger sister's words a little now. But it was still a word I couldn't completely agree with.

"You dressed up first and came out, so I did the same for you?"

Siwoo said with a smile.

"What are you talking about. I didn't? I just wore what my younger sister told me to wear."

"Then today?"

"It's the same today. She can't set up my clothes every day. She told me in advance to wear them like this when I buy clothes."

Of course, like yesterday, I chose something plain from the clothes I bought.

If I were to 'really' dress up, it would be a day when I would wear short pants that showed my legs, or even a skirt.

"Wow, that's too bad. I didn't really dress up, but you saw that and dressed up and came out."

"What are you talking about."