A quick rant, because I think it's important to say this

Hey guys. Hope you're doing well, and I hope you've been enjoying all the content lately. I just thought I'd get this out of the way now, because it's been bothering me for quite some time (don't worry, this isn't some announcement to say I'll be stopping/delaying videos). I've hit a pretty big musician's/creative block, and I've had it for about 3 months. While I'm able to come up with originals that people enjoy, they slowly end up becoming something I am not happy with. Something I'm not completely proud to call my own. Don't get me wrong though. Its not like I think they're trash. I wouldn't upload them if that were the case. So I do enjoy them to an extent. 

This can sometimes lead to a frantic week where I need to make something up for the coming saturday, because youtube's algorithm will mess me up if I don't. In this way, I start seeing my guitar as a tool or a means to an end. I also realized that I haven't been actively listening to any music. I'd would listen to a cool song a few times, and then go back to..nothing. There is not a lot of inspiration and motivation coming from anywhere to spike a new interest in me.

But I think the honest truth to this all is that depression isn't necessarily a fun thing. I made a promise I wouldn't get too personal or be in any kind of drama when it came to my online self, but I think you guys deserve to hear this. I could be wrong though. This could be a bad idea as well. Depression makes it hard to stay motivated and inspired in the first place. It sucks that the main thing I do is something that is stressing me out currently. I'm sure I'll get out of this block. It hasn't been my first one, but it has definitely been the longest one. The lack of listening to music and practicing (because I'm busy making a video or doing something else) are not ideal habits for the growth of a composer. I'm not completely sure what to do in this case, but I'll be trying new things every day.

I wanted to mention that all, because at this point, I'm unsure if I deserve the amount of support you guys give me. You've helped me a lot and even saved my youtube career when my interface broke and I needed to buy a new one. You definitely help make life more manageable. So I will say this now. I am going to continue improving in my videos, creative block or not. Don't worry about it dying down in any way. I have video ideas that span MONTHS. This is more of a personal issue. But I do apologize if some videos have been unsatisfactory. Truth is, I'm just looking to feel something again. It happens from time to time. I'm never gonna give up. But if I'm a little late to comment/inbox replies...or if I don't reply at all...just bear with me for a little bit. I'll be on top of it all soon. Thanks for everything, guys. Just needed to vent a little.