endlessjess

Dinosaur Time

Added 2022-07-31 04:38:47 +0000 UTC

Ah yes, I see patreon has decided to update itself in such a way as to make me not know what the fuck i'm looking at, my favorite. I'll figure out this labyrinthine interface later, at least i was able to find the button to make my posts, hopefully you can still read them without a degree in needlessly obtuse web design.

Technology, computers, internet, the shackles of a digitized dungeon. Who needs it? Not me, that's who. Some other guy, probably. But personally I'd rather reject modernity and be a fuckin dinosaur. A cool one like in that Primal show, or in the game Primal Rage, not the foo-foo ones in this game, which aren't primal at all. But speaking of this game, it's awesome.

It's clearly based on some baby cartoon show for dumb children but it seems some wires got crossed and they accidentally made the game good, which is good for me but carries cataclysmic consequences for the rest of the earth, because as the good lord figured out when he cursed me to ruin, if i'm allowed to have fun i become dangerously cool and my power becomes an uncontainable threat.

Okay surely i don't need to write a 4th paragraph for this one. The video is hilarious and it's full of dinosaurs, what more do you need to know? Oh, i get it. You're waiting for life advice right? You hear a man screaming about gay dinosaurs and you think that guy must have the answers. Well i don't blame you because that sounds pretty fair and logical, so i shall indulge your thirst for knowledge and impart a small piece of wisdom.

Here's your lesson for the day. Never hurt your back and your ass at the same time. You can't stand or sit. It's not fun. Being a dinosaur is fun. I wish i was a dinosaur. There is no place for me in the modern world.