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Bitter Karella
Bitter Karella

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Midnight Pals: Horror Zine

Edward Lee: hey broooo
Lee: it's time for a bros night out!
Lovecraft: oh no
Lee: we're gonna have so much fun, bro!
Lee: Jordan won't even remember his ex
Jordan Shiveley: sighhh
Shiveley: [plaintiffly touching framed photo] the void…

Lee: bro
Lee: bro trust me
Lee: once you see this place, you're gonna forget all about the void
Lee: we're gonna get so much tail
Lee: [puts on cassette tape, "Boys Are Back in Town" plays]

[at the club]
Jeani Rector: welcome to the horror zine
Rector: name?
Lee: Edward lee
Lee: i'm on the list
Rector: hmmm nope
Rector: we don't accept splatterpunk
Lee: bro
Lee: bro c'mon
Lee: check the list again

Rector: sorry the horror zine is very exclusive
Lee: bro i was joking
Lee: i don't actually write splatterpunk
Lee: lol just a joke, bro
Lee: i actually write sexy horror
Rector: we don't accept sexy horror either
Lee: GODDAMNIT IT BRO!!

Rector: listen up
Rector: here's the rules for the horror zine
Rector: no sex allowed
Rector: no gore allowed
Rector: no serial killers allowed
Rector: no slashers allowed
Rector: no religious or political themes allowed

Rector: and remember, if you're doing vampires or werewolves
Rector: you gotta follow the rules!
Lee: oh yeah totally, bro
Rector: i mean, where would we be without the rules?
Lee: totally

Koontz: can i come in?
Rector: no!
Koontz: but why not? :(
Rector: because
Rector: NO DOGS ALLOWEDDDD

Lovecraft: perhaps i could get in?
Lee: bro! are you ditching us, bro?!
Lovecraft: no i just
Lovecraft: i just
Lovecraft: can i come in?
Rector: no old timey writing allowed either
Lovecraft:
Lee: OHHH!!
Lee: look who comes crawling back, bro

Rector: see it's extremely exclusive
Rector: only the cream of the crop get into the horror zine
Rector: only the absolute best horror writers
Rector: the 1%
Rector: the beautiful people

Lee: well, i didn't want to go in anyway, bro!
Rector: very good, sir
Lee: see ya bro!
Rector: goodbye, sir
Lee: [whispering to Lovecraft & Shiveley) we'll sneak in the back

Comments

It should probably change its name to "The Zine" XD

Bitter Karella

Horror Zine doesn't sound like a fun place tbh

Shirley R


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