Midnight Pals: Aliens

Whitley Strieber: big news, Dreamland grey wolves!!!
Strieber: i have
Strieber: here in my hand
Strieber: proof of alien existence
Strieber: it turns out
Strieber: the truth WAS out there after all!

Strieber: check this out
Barker: it's a photo
Strieber: yes
Barker: of one of those spirit halloween foam rubber aliens
Strieber: y-NO
Barker: yeah i've seen these, the eyes light up when you stand on the sensor
Koontz: wow! real aliens!

Strieber: no you fools! look, to the untrained eye, this might look like a mere halloween prop
Strieber: but perhaps you didn't notice
Strieber: this alien has an absolutely massive vagina
Barker:
Barker: tell us more
Poe: clive
Barker: no edgar i know you want to hear this too

Strieber: see, that's the thing
Strieber: most people don't know that aliens have huge vaginas
Strieber: just gargantuan
King: he's right, actually
King: i did not know that
King: i'm learning so much today

Strieber: you usually don't see the gigantic yawning vaginas
Strieber: on account of the fact that they're usually wearing those sparkly silver jumpsuits with the zipper up the back
Strieber: but
Strieber: you know those aliens that abducted me?
Strieber: real big flappy pussies

Strieber: i showed this photo to my friend uri geller
Strieber: yeah and he agreed with me it's totally real
Strieber: and it's not like uri geller could be wrong about something like that
King:
Poe:
Lovecraft:
Barker:
Koontz:

Poe: come on whitley, how do you know this is real at all?
Strieber: as it just so happens, i've asked an expert to look at it
Strieber: someone who spends all her time obsessively looking at genitals
JK Rowling: hello children

Rowling: [looking at photo] yessss
Rowling: now thiss iss an adult female alien that i would allow to ussse a resstroom
Rowling: i can tell this vagina iss real
Rowling: we can alwaysss tell
Rowling: because of the pixelsss and alssso having sseen quite a few vaginasss in my time

Rowling: thisss vagina isss real
Barker: it's very clearly made of foam rubber
Rowling: EXCUSSSE ME
Rowling: i think i know what a vagina looksss like
Rowling: like i wouldn't immediately recognize a sssingle hole usssed for copulatory, excremental and urinary functionsss!