Midnight Pals: Going on the BBC

[mysterious circle of robed figures]
JK Rowling: hello children
JK Rowling: today we begin our biggessssst challenge
Jesse Singal: bigger than convincing our terf legion that men have a special bone that makes them good at chess?
JK Rowling: no that was remarkably easssy actually

JK Rowling: today we rehabilitate graham lineham
Singal: b-but mommy!
Singal: graham lineham is the one terf too toxic for the BBC
Rowling: isss he? Rowling: the whole point of the BBC is to launder terfsss
Rowling: itsss time they ssstarted doing their job!

Rowling: maybe if we cleaned him up a little
Graham Lineham: FECK ARSE [vomits]
Rowling: we could try teaching him a few sssimple phrasses
Rowling: enough that he could move out of my basssement

Rowling: will you not just give it a go graham [pointing at  blackboard on which is written "yes" and "I am being silenced for my views"]
Lineham: y-y-y
Rowling: yesss! yessss! keep going!!
Lineham: [inarticulate slurs]
Rowling:
Rowling: better

Rowling: come on graham i know you can do it
Lineham: [inarticulate slurs]
Rowling: graham if you sssay the line, there will be a little treat in it for you
Lineham: [inarticulate slurs]?
Rowling: yesss
Rowling: sssay the line
Rowling: and you can sssleep in your racecar bed

Rowling: finally! now graham is ready for hissss big debut on the BBC
Lineham: [inarticulate slurs]
Singal: golly mommy he sounds the same!
Rowling:
Rowling: yeah well
Rowling: they can fix it in possst

BBC Announcer: welcome to the BBC, coming up is Part 8 of Sir Nigel Hemmingwedge St. Plonkington's 12 part documentary on the St. Slurryshire cheesemonger guild, followed by Are You Being Served? and the Brexit is Going Great report
BBC Announcer: but first some light revisionism

BBC Announcer: joining us is graham lineham who has some views worth considering
Lineham: [vomits] FECK ARSE
Lineham: [inarticulate slurs]
JK Rowling: what graham meansss issss we jussst have sssome concernsss
Rowling: and you BETTER consssider them

Rowling: real nice sstudio you got here, BBC
Rowling: be a real shame if ssomething were to happen to it
Rowling: like, sssay, you had to film another cormoran ssstrike ssseries here
BBC Announcer: no no! anything but that! we'll consider your concerns!
Rowling: sssee that you do