Prison Break 2X14: John Doe

God damnit. We were so fucking close. Steadman is dead? What the fuck are we supposed to do now?

So, Michael and Lincoln have decided to stick with Kellerman, at least for the time being. He's taking them to Steadman, which will prove that Lincoln didn't kill him since, you know, he's alive. (Or, well, he was).

Kim is tipped off just in time and as we're loading Steadman into the car, they realize it's Kellerman and the brothers. After Kellerman threatens to shoot the protective detail, (and I think actually does shoot some of them) they let them get away. They hole up in a motel and try to figure out what to do. Kellerman claims the only real option is to get them to DC so Steadman can talk to ex Company members who would sympathetic.

I so don't understand this. Even if they were sympathetic, even if Lincoln didn't deserve to be in jail in the first place, after all they've done since, there is zero chance they are not going back to jail. I mean, I guess we take down a big government conspiracy, but Michael and Lincoln are absolutely going back to jail after this.

And, Kellerman explains to us the Steadman doesn't even exist. They have completely erased him. He has no fingerprints or teeth, and has had plastic surgery so he didn't even really look like himself anymore. So, they can't just claim he's alive and they found him, since even through he's right there, it'll just sound like rantings of a crazy person.

Anyway, Michael doesn't like this plan. He thinks they should call the news (which was my first thought too), but Kellerman tells him that a bad plan. The cops will show up too. But Michael is determined. However, shortly before the cops get there, Steadman grabs Lincoln's gun and kills himself. Fun. Now there's just a body of a John Doe in the room. Zero idea where we go from here.

While this is going on Pocket Boy is playing house with Susan and the kids (who are thrilled that he's back- Susan not so much). She's incredibly uncomfortable, but is playing along, biding her time hoping she can figure something out before he hurts them. She pretends to spill a drink and goes to grab her gun under the guise of getting a rag, but Pocket Boy's already taken it.

He loses his shit when he realizes she was going to shoot him. And starts screaming about how he's great and she should love him. Eventually, the son, hearing all the yelling, sneaks up and hits Pocket Boy the face with something. But, whatever it is doesn't really work. In the next scene we see he'd tied up the whole family and is busy nailing plywood to the door so no one can escape.

I cannot believe that this is what he wanted so badly when he was in jail. I thought this was going to be revenge for putting him away. Not forcing her to love him. Also, why would you so desperately want to be with someone that obviously hates you? How is that an enjoyable life experience?

Mahone, it turns out, is alive. He tells Kim that Kellerman shot him and took off with Michael and Lincoln. Then he tells his Company handler that he's out. Let them tell whoever they want that he killed Shales. He's not doing this anymore. And ten minutes later, the fucking Company hit his kid with a car. He resigns himself to being back in. But, instead of killing Kellerman, he instead, kills his handler.

And no one really cares what's going on with C-Note. But his wife is stuck in jail, and doesn't want him to come clean because then their daughter gets stuck in foster care. This is easily, the least compelling story.

Plus, I'm impatiently waiting for next episode when Bellick gets the shit kicked out of him. I'm giddy with anticipation. I realize this probably makes me a bad person, but 🤷‍♀️.