WIEDERGEBURT Act VII: Chapter 8

“Damn godling! Who the fuck does this shit think he is?! When I get my hands on him, I am going to make him regret ever being born!”

Morden scowled as he kept his arm pressed firmly against the severed end of his shoulder. White threads of life energy flitted through his skin like a thread and needle through cloth. While recreating an arm from scratch was impossible for anyone who hadn’t mastered the Concept of Creation, it was perfectly possible to reattach a severed arm so long as the nerve endings hadn’t been destroyed. Small miracle. Both his arm and leg had been completely clean cuts.

Honestly, that just pissed him off more.

With his army completely routed, Morden was left with no one but himself. He sat in the middle of this inhospitable desert. His leg had already been reattached, and now he was in the process of reattaching his arm.

As he repaired his broken body, he cursed at Eryk Vanir, at those two women with him, and at the snake woman who fought him before that. He was a member of the Zehn Todesharr. He might have been the weakest among them, but that was not a title one earned lightly, and to be defeated by a godling who hadn’t even reached a hundred, a human, and a Drakvarian was just humiliating.

“How am I going to deal with this situation now?” he wondered out loud. “Should I contact the others? No. No. No. That would not work. They would all laugh at me if they found out about what happened. They might even strip me of my position.”

That was the last thing he wanted to happen. He had worked hard to become the tenth member of the Zehn Todesharr. It had been much harder for him to reach this position too, since the war had long since been over by the time he really came into his own power. He’d been forced to work nearly twice as hard as the other nine. Those bastards. Even after he became one of them, they never treated him like he was part of their group. That was why they had sent him to this fucking desert. He was sure they just wanted him out of the way.

He was going to show them.

He would show them what he was capable of.

Yes, he would make them understand that he deserved this position.

The only question was: How?

“I cannot attack that settlement alone. I need reinforcements.”

That much was obvious, but the problem was getting them. Morden knew how to open a Warp Gate, but that involved finding ruins with a working Warp Gate and enough human sacrifices to power the gate. He could probably find ruins even in this shithole. The problem was finding enough humans. Morden didn’t think there were enough humans living here to open a Warp Gate.

“I suppose there is nothing to it. I’ll just have to search the entire fucking desert.”

With his arm reattached, Morden stood up and tested it out. He moved the limb left, right, up, and down. He rotated his shoulders and curled his fingers. Everything seemed to be in working order.

Grunting, Morden set off in a random direction to find a Warp Gate and some humans to kill.

***

I think the greatest benefit of being a Spiritualist was that I could have sex all night long and still not be tired the next morning. This was just a personal opinion as a man with four wives. Physical intimacy was an important aspect of being in a relationship, polyamorous or otherwise, and having this kind of incredible stamina was definitely one aspect of being a powerful Spiritualist that I could get behind.

Then again, I think the fact that I was having these thoughts maybe said something about my current mental state.

It was early morning. The sun was beginning to rise. Light streamed in through the windowless windows on the western side of the room. A scent like desert sand was carried on a breeze, oddly pleasant despite its harshness.

I was lying on the bed, Fay snuggled within my arms, her head resting on my chest as I stroked her beautiful locks of red hair, which fanned across my body and the bed sheets. The warmth from my sleeping wife was lulling. However, I found that even after Fay had fallen asleep, I could not bring myself to sleep just yet.

I was thinking about my son.

Eight years had passed since I’d seen him, making Raul sixteen years old. Guilt plagued me over this fact. I hated that I had not been here to help raise him, to teach him, to give him the love a father should. After the meeting the other day ended, I had wanted to speak him him. He did not seem to feel the same. Even before my wives had dragged me off, Raul had disappeared.

Fay suddenly stirred in my arms. I looked down at the woman as she blinked her gorgeous green eyes open. Groaning, she placed her hands on my chest, sat up, and stretched her back like a cat. Her chest dangled in front of my face. I was very tempted to take her inverted nipples in my mouth, but now was not the time.

“Morning, Fay.”

“Good morning.”

Fay smiled at me as she leaned in for a kiss. Soft and loving, just like her, it was a kiss that infused all of the emotions she had kept locked away for those eight long years.

“Did you not sleep?” asked Fay, leaning back.

I gave her a bitter smile. “Not a wink. I was… thinking.”

“About Raul,” Fay said with a nod.

“Yeah,” I sighed.

Fay did not respond at first and instead climbed out of bed, wandered over to the bath, and grabbed the bucket. She sat on the edge as she filled the bucket with water and dumped it over her head. I admired the way her muscles shone as glittering droplets reflected off her beautiful skin. She scrubbed herself down with some soap and the plant-scrub—what was it called again?—and then rinsed it all off with another bucket of water.

Finally, she turned to me.

“Come over here, Eryk. I doubt you want to meet your son reeking of sex. Let me help you wash up.”

I didn’t need a moment’s consideration to take my wife up on her offer. Climbing out of bed, I traveled over to the bath, sat down on the edge.

Fay dumped a bucket of water over my head, drenching me in chilling cold. Water in the Endless Desert was normally hot or lukewarm, but it became colder at night as the freezing temperatures set in. The cold didn’t both me though.

“Raul is avoiding me, isn’t he?” I asked as Fay began scrubbing my back.

“He is, but please don’t blame him. Raul has lived without you for eight years,” Fay said.

I shook my head, water droplets flying from my hair. “I don’t blame him. I never would. I’m just not sure how I should talk to him.”

“I’m sure he feels the same way.”

It was a bit sad that I couldn’t figure out what to say to my own son, but this situation was not one I had expected to find myself in either. I didn’t hate my parents now that I knew they hadn’t abandoned me by choice. At the same time, I didn’t want to be the kind of father who would abandon his child, and the fact that I had, even if that had not been my intention, left a bitter taste in my mouth.

Fay finished washing me off, and the two of us relaxed in the bath for a few moments longer. I looked over at the curtain partitioning Lin’s section of the room.

“Lin’s still not awake,” I mumbled.

Fay also looked at the curtain, which rustled in the wind. “Considering what happened the other day, I am not surprised. Lin had only just come out of closed-door training during the battle. I’m certain she was already tired for training an entire year, and to fight immediately after that? I’m surprised she lasted long enough to have sex with you.”

“There are two things Lin always have enough time and energy for,” I stated with certainty.

“And what’s that?”

“Food and sex.”

Fay snorted as she gave me an amused smile, but she didn’t disagree with me.

“All right.” I stood up, water cascading down my body. “I think it’s about time I went and talked to Raul.”

“You can probably find him with Aliya and Earland,” Fay suggested. “He likes to spend time with them. If he’s not there, try searching for Sana and Lilac. Those two can find him no matter where he tries to hide.”

“Are those two bloodhounds or something?” I asked.

“Or something,” Fay said with a cheeky smile.

***

Kari woke up with a dragon girl using her breasts as pillows. She gave the still sleeping Siv a loving look and reached out to push some of the silvery green hair out of the girl’s face. Siv was lying on her stomach. It was her preferred posture since her wings often got in the way when she tried other positions.

As she became more alert, Kari looked around at the living space she had slept in. It was not very large, probably five or six hundred square meters, and had sparse amounts of furniture. There was a large bed, a table, a bath, and the divan upon which she and Siv had slept.

There were no extra rooms for her and Siv right now, and since Eryk was spending time with Lin and Fay after so long, Kari and Siv decided to bunk with someone else.

“You’re awake,” someone said.

Kari tilted her head to look in the direction of the voice. Earland had not changed much in the years they had been apart. He looked a few years older, around his mid or late-thirties, but his spiky hair was still brown, his eyes were still bright blue, and he was still powerfully built. A dull brown tunic covered his torso and black pants made of wool kept the sun off his pale skin.

“Morning,” Kari muttered to her brother. “Aliya still asleep?”

“Yeah.” He nodded toward the bed, where Aliya was still soundly sleeping.

Kari giggled. “I can’t believe you’re married. You never struck me as the type to get married.”

Earland gave her a stern look, but then he sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “I never expected to get married either.”

“Married life suits you,” Kari said.

“You think so? I sometimes wonder about that…”

Kari thought Earland’s uncertainty was charming. He might not think being married suited him, but it was clear to her that her brother had changed a great deal. The Earland she remembered barely ever talked. Getting him to say ten words was harder than prying teeth out of a Basilisk while it was still alive, but last night, she and Earland had spoken for several hours—and he’d done most of the talking.

That sure surprised her.

Sitting up and shifting around, Kari eventually found a comfortable position where she could let Siv continued to sleep with her head on Kari’s thighs. She stroked the girls hair as she turned back to Earland.

“So you don’t know where our parents or brothers are?” she asked.

“I do not.” Earland shook his head. “I was separated from Geirolf and Mykkel during the battle that forced us all to retreat.” He paused, took a deep breath, and blew it out. “I’m not sure where they are right now, but I am positive they are still alive.”

“Me too. I’m sure we will find them eventually,” Kari said with confidence. Her words caused Earland to smile at her, which was… different. She still wasn’t used to seeing him smile.

Siv and Aliya both woke up at close to the same time. Kari amusingly thought it might be a cold-blooded thing since they both awoke just as the sun was beginning to warm their skin. While Siv merely sat up with a yawn, Aliya slithered over to the window let herself bask in the sun and Earland’s embrace.

Kari was amused to see her brother blush when he noticed her staring at him.

Very amused.

“I think it’s about time for breakfast,” Earland said.

Aliya sighed, nodded, and turned to Kari. “You should join us. Breakfast is served in several places around the city. Everyone has to line up and wait their turn, but Spiritualists who fight on the frontlines are given preferential treatment… so long as we get there before the morning rush.”

“Okay. We’ll join you,” Kari said.

She and Siv took a bath late last night. The clothes they wore now were also different. Kari wore shorts, stockings, and a short-sleeved white and blue blouse. Siv had a backless shirt for to let her wings through and pants. Of course, she wasn’t wearing any footwear like Kari.

As the four of them emerged into a long hallway and began their journey outside, they ran into Eryk just as he was turning a corner. He blinked at them several times. Then he smiled, but he seemed distracted.

“Kari. Siv.” He gave each of them a kiss. It was just a peck on the lips, but it was enough to satisfy Kari for now. “How are you two this morning?”

“We’re good,” Kari said for them both. “And you? Pleasant night?”

Eryk chuckled. “Pleasant enough.” His amusement left a moment later as he glanced at Aliya and Earland. “Have you two seen Raul anywhere this morning? I heard he liked to spend time with you.”

Kari blinked at the mention of Raul. She hadn’t forgotten their son—how could she?—but she would admit that so much had happened within such a short time that she hadn’t really considered where he’d gone. She glanced at Earland and Aliya, who both shook their heads.

“I haven’t seen him since yesterday’s battle,” Aliya confessed. “You might want to check the palace roof. He likes to spend time up there when he wants to be alone.”

“Palace roof.” Eryk nodded. “Thank you.”

Kari thought about inviting Eryk to join them for breakfast, but when she saw the look on his face, she thought better of it. Her husband was clearly a man on a quest. Much as she wanted to share a meal with him, she wanted him to find their son and have a good heart-to-heart even more.

Eryk said goodbye and went off in search of Raul.

***

“Try this, Raul! It’s delicious.”

“Hmph! What sort of garbage is that? Try this instead, Raul. I’m sure you’ll love it.”

“Excuse you! This is traditional Endless Desert cuisine, you albino hag!”

“Traditional? Ha. That’s the kind of crap you can only find at street vendor stalls.”

“And what’s wrong with that?!”

Raul really wanted to know how he’d found himself in this situation so early in the morning. He’d woken up, slipped out of his bedroom quietly so as not to wake his roommates, and then went to his perch so he could watch the sun rise.

Unfortunately, Sana and Lilac were there when he arrived. They had dragged him off to get some breakfast, heedless of his complaints.

He honestly didn’t mind eating breakfast with them, but he did have a problem when they began trying to feed him… and then began fighting over who should get to feed him. What was he? Some kind of animal? They were treating him like a cute squirrel you might find in a park or their ducks he used to see old people feeding bread to at the pond.

It was downright humiliating.

“How about I don’t eat either of your food and eat what I got instead?” Raul suggested.

“You don’t want to eat my ful medames? But it’s delicious,” said Lilac, jutting out her lower lip in a pout.

“This grilled pita bread and boiled eggs are much better,” Sana said as she glared at Raul. “I’m sure you will agree once you give them a try.”

Raul wished these two could just leave him in peace if they were going to argue.

The early morning sun was still rising, but it was enough to heat up the desert sands. Many a Lamia were beginning their morning ritual, which involved sunbathing on the sand to warm up their bodies. A lot of these Lamia used to do this naked. However, ever since other races began making this city their home, this had changed, and now it wasn’t unusual to see Lamia wearing skimpy clothing to cover their privates while they baked themselves in the sun.

He, Sana, and Lilac were sitting on a bench to eat. There were several such benches set up around the city. The entire community was served food at a number of locations. This was done because it was just more practical than having everyone make their own meals. Many of these houses were not equipped for cooking, which of course meant there were a lot of people who couldn’t cook. From what Raul had been told, this wasn’t so different from how it was before all these refugees arrived.

As Sana and Lilac tried to force their food him to eat their food, a strange feeling came over him, like someone was watching him. He looked around. There were a lot of people, of course, but it didn’t seem like any of them were staring at him. Had he just imagined it?

“What’s wrong, Raul?” asked Sana.

Raul frowned, shook his head, and said, “nothing.”

“Good. Then go ahead and try this pita bread and boiled eggs. You won’t regret it.”

“Oh, no you don’t! Raul is going to try my ful medames!”

Raul sighed as the two began fighting again.

***

What was I doing? Why was I hiding?

After discovering Kari and Siv with Earland and Aliya, I went up to the palace rooftops in search of Raul, but I didn’t find him there. Since I wasn’t sure where to begin looking, I went to one of the food stations, got a bowl of what looked like fava beans in tahini sauce, and began wandering around.

There were a lot of people. When I first arrived in this city with Lin, Kari, Fay, Siv, and Raul, there had been only a thousand or so people at the most. Lamia were not a very populous species. Now there were maybe twenty thousand people present. When I reached out with Spiritual Perception, I could sense at least fifteen thousand people.

It seemed most of the people living here were Spiritualists.

I had used Spiritual Perception to track down my son. Even though it had been eight years, I still had no trouble distinguishing him from everyone else. Spiritual Signatures were a lot like a fingerprint. No two Spiritualists had the same one. Raul had next to two other Spiritual Signatures, but I hadn’t let that bothered me as I traveled toward his location.

At least, it hadn’t until I realized he was with two girls.

The two in question were Lilac—a beautiful olive-skinned woman—and Sana—an albino with pale skin, white hair, and red eyes. I recognized them easily enough. Even back when Raul was just three years old, those two had been fawning over Fay. They had come over for dinner several times as well. Sometimes they would even come to play with Raul, who’d been quite fond of the pair at the time.

Well, it seemed they were quite fond of Raul now, and not in the way they might be fond of a little brother.

I watched from a distance, unsure if I should go up and talk to him. I thought maybe now wasn’t the best time. However, as I debated with myself, Raul seemed to sense me looking at him. He turned around and began scanning the area.

That was when I hid behind a building.

I still wasn’t sure why.

Taking several deep breaths to calm my oddly racing heart, I peered out from behind the building again and found Raul traveling off with Sana and Lilac hugging his arms. It was probably wrong of me. However, I felt an intense burst of pride when I saw how enamored those two were with my son. Both girls were very pretty and incredibly talented. He could definitely do worse.

I also had to give props to Sana and Lilac. Those girls clearly understood my son’s attractive qualities.

Because I didn’t want to intrude upon my son’s romance, I decided not to bother him right now. I traveled back to the palace and floated up to the roof, where I plopped down with my legs dangling over the edge, and people watched.

Breakfast was just concluding. The last few stragglers were getting their meals, but most of the people had already begun working. Most of the work involved repairing the buildings that had been destroyed. Most of these buildings were made from sun dried mud bricks that were reinforced with a refining process similar to alchemy. I was watching as they laid down the bricks on sediment, then painted over everything with another mud-like substance.

Further out, I saw the Lightning Giant camp, though I felt the word “camp” was maybe too kind. None of them had anything to sleep on—not even a sleeping bag, much less a tent. They were just relaxing on a large patch of empty desert. I think they understood that most of the people in the city were afraid of them, which was why they kept their distance. We had allied ourselves with them. I wondered about what was going to happen now.

“Ah…”

A voice appeared behind me. It sounded a little like my own. The pitch and timbre were similar at least.

I turned around to see Raul staring at me with a shocked expression and a pale face. I’d heard he liked to make the palace roof his perch and look at the people as they worked, but I didn’t think he would be here right now. I figured he’d still be spending time with Sana and Lilac. Perhaps Raul was still naive in the ways of women? Was that also my fault?

“Raul,” I began.

“Father,” Raul started.

We both stopped talking after interrupting each other. Oh, boy. This was… awkward. I would have liked to say I didn’t know why I felt so self-conscious around my own son, but I wasn’t that dense. I knew it was because of the guilt I felt over leaving him for eight years.

“Why don’t you sit down,” I suggested, patting the spot beside me.

“Right. Okay,” Raul mumbled.

He sat down beside me, legs dangling over the side, and for the first time since I arrived back in this realm, I was able to get a really good look at my son.

He looked so much like Fay and I. His hair was the same red as his mom, but its consistency and texture was definitely mine. He had my face. I considered this a good thing. I already looked feminine enough. That said, he did have Fay’s nose and chin. His eyes were closer to mine’s than Fay’s, but his skin possessed a tan that was darker than both of us. I assumed this was because of how long he’d been living in the Endless Desert. It looked like a natural tan from the sun.

“So I—”

“I wanted to—”

We stopped talking again after interrupting each other. Again.

“You go first, father,” Raul said, and while I liked to think he was saying that to be polite and let his elder go first, it was more likely that he just didn’t know what to say and was letting me go first.

I sighed at this thought, but decided to take him up on his offer.

“You know… this place is a lot different than it was fifteen years ago,” I said at last. “Back then there were only Lamia, and none of them wore a single stitch of clothing. It was pretty surprising. Ever seen a couple hundred Lamia just lying naked on the sand? It’s a pretty… impressive sight.”

“I heard about that from Mom.” Raul nodded once as he looked at the city with me. “From what I understand, the Sekbeist also hit the Endless Desert around the same time they arrived in the Northern Plains. However, the Endless Desert was not as well-equipped to deal with them. Many cities fell. It was during the siege of Muqadas that Queen Medusa and her Lamia came to help the humans. They protected everyone and escorted them here. After that, the Lamia as a people began to change as they adopted some of humanity’s customs.”

“And this includes wearing clothes?” I asked.

Raul shrugged. “I guess so.”

“Hmmm…”

The conversation trailed off again after that, and I found myself at a complete loss for words. There were so many things I wanted to say that I didn’t know what I should start with.

Well, I guessed the best place to start was with an apology.

“I’m sorry, Raul.”

“What?” Raul turned his head to stare at me in shock. “Why?”

“For leaving you, Fay, and Lin alone. For not being there when you three needed me.” I bit the inside of my lip to keep myself calm, but while I think I appeared collected, I was anything but on the inside. “I never wanted to leave you three. I wanted to be there for every moment of your lives. To see you master your first element. To watch you grow and fall in love. I wanted to do so many things with you, share so many life experiences with you, but in the end, I was unable to do any of them. I disappeared from your life, and you grew up without me. I’m sorry.”

Raul didn’t say anything for the longest time. He stared at me for several moments. They were only seconds, but it felt like they had extended into hours.

Finally, Raul sighed. “Did you think about us while you were in that other realm?”

“Every day,” I confirmed. “Not a day passed when I didn’t think of you, Fay, and Lin. You were always on my mind, and I was determined to return to you. But I didn’t know how. Before I even knew it, four whole years passed.” I blew out a breath. “And even more time passed here. I almost forgot that time works different on Miðgarðr.”

“What do you mean?” asked Raul.

I thought about how best to explain it, but eventually shrugged and said, “This was something I learned in my previous life, but time here flows faster than the other realms. While eight years passed here, only four years and a few months passed on Gudeverdenen and Vindenket. I do not know why this is. I suspect it might have something to do with the barrier that isolates each realm from the others, but I don’t have any solid proof.”

“So not as much time passed where you were, Huh? That’s interesting,” Raul muttered. He scratched the back of his head and sighed. “Well, either way, I want you to know that I’m not mad at you.”

I perked up. “You’re not?”

“I’m not.” He shook his head, then smiled. “I was at the beginning, but that was because Mom and Aunty Lin used to cry themselves to sleep a lot.” I flinched when Raul mentioned this, something he noticed because he flinched too. “N-not that they were crying because they thought you were dead. Even when everyone else said you were dead, they were adamant that you were alive.” He sighed and looked back at the city. “But even though they were certain of your survival, your absence still hurt them. Of course, it wasn’t easy for me either.”

“Yeah.” I chuckled bitterly. “I figured as much.”

“But I know you aren’t the kind of parent who would abandon your son and wives,” Raul continued before I could descend into a pity part. “I know that. I remember how much time you spent with me, how much you helped me during training or when I had a problem. You always did your best to be a part of my life even when you were busy with work. That’s why I know you would never leave us if it could be helped. And now I know the truth. You weren’t gone because you wanted to be. You were tossed into another realm and had no way back.”

“Raul…”

“So don’t beat yourself up, Dad.” Raul grinned at me, and it was like dawn breaking through the clouds of my heart. “I could never hate you. Not in a million years.”

I sniffed and tried to discreetly wipe the moisture from my eyes. Reaching over, I startled my son by pulling him into a hug. It was the first time in eight years that I’d hugged my own son. I wished I could have done this more often while he was growing up, wished I had been there for every step of his life, but the past could not be changed… unless I went back in time, but I didn’t think I’d be lucky enough for that to happen twice.

I also wasn’t sure I wanted it to. If the past did change, if I never traveled to Gudeverdenen, I would never have learned what I knew now. I would still be weak. And maybe myself, Raul, Lin, Fay, Kari, and Siv would all be dead right now instead of sitting here to have this conversation.

“Thanks, Raul. You’ve really grown into an amazing young man. I’m so proud of you.”

“Thank you, Fath—mm. Thanks, Dad.”

Sitting side-by-side with my son, I decided that even if I wasn’t able to be there for Raul when he was growing up, I could be there for him now. I would never leave my family’s side again.

***

Raul and I headed back to Fay’s and Lin’s later in the afternoon. The two of them had been joined by Kari and Siv, who Raul greeted with hugs and kisses when we arrived. Both his “Big Sister” and “Small Sister” gushed over how much he had grown and how powerful he’d become. Raul was a very modest and calm boy. However, I think being doted on by his moms like this was embarrassing for him because he was blushing to the roots of his hair.

We spent the day talking and playing games. I soon discovered that Raul was very good at Hnefatafl. I also learned that Lin had not improved at all in our eight years apart after she lost ten consecutive times straight to Raul.

Perhaps it was because this was the first time all of us had been together in so long, but I felt so at peace in that moment. Our home was destroyed, our people were scattered, the people I had traveled here with were lost, and the Sekbeists were breathing down our necks. I hadn’t forgotten any of that. But I could put it aside for now. I could relax and not let it rule me. As that old saying went, we would cross those bridges when we got to them.

“I think it’s about time for lunch,” Fay said after awhile.

We were all sitting together by the bath, our shoes off, pants rolled up, and feet in the water. It was nice. I couldn’t remember ever doing this before, but it was very pleasant.

“So we need to head outside, right?” asked Kari.

“Yeah. Only the chefs are allowed into the kitchens to prevent people from stealing. Everyone eats from the same giant pot,” Lin said.

“What are we waiting for then? Let’s go. I’m starving,” I said.

“This princess can eat a whole cow!” Lin added.

“I think I could eat a cow too,” Siv said.

Lin hissed. “This princess can eat too cows.”

“… I can too.”

Lin and Siv stared at each other, and for just a moment, I thought I saw sparks flying. I wondered why Siv was picking a fight with Lin. Thinking about it, I believed this tied into what she told me back on Gudeverdenen. She wanted to become stronger. She didn’t want to remain meek. Maybe picking a fight with Lin, whom she had always kind of let do whatever she wanted, was her way of trying to become strong.

“Oh, my,” Kari muttered with a smile.

Before I could try to break the pair up, someone knocked on the door. I went over to see who it was. I blinked when I saw that it was Alexis on the other side.

“Hey, Alexis. Did you need something?”

“I don’t, but everyone else on the council does,” Alexis said without preamble. “We’re about to begin the meeting to decide what we should do from here on out, and you, your wives, and your son are all obligated to attend.”