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Chuck Tingle
Chuck Tingle

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Lesbian Roller Coaster Barista Gets Me Off: A Trans Buckaroo Tale - (Classic Tingler Revisited)

HECK YEAH BUCKAROOS what a day. i am back from trotting around the country on my dang book tour and wow am i tired. as man name of chuck i have way of boundless energy but by the end it felt like i hit the end of this trot. STILL i have no doubt old chuck could have gone on and on because GUESS WHAT with the power of love at your back pushing you onward you can do pretty much anything. here is nice video from book tour to see tingleverse energy in action

REGARDLESS feels good to be back at dang home, which also feels a little strange to say because billings used to be home and now i suddenly realize it has been long enough that los angeles (city of devils) feels like HOME now.

there is a storm rollin in but today is still bright and sunny. i am sitting at a coffee shop sipping on my chocolate milk and enjoying this rest. it is such a nice cozy feeling after being away for so long that i decided to revisit this CLASSIC COFFEE SHOP TINGLER. hopefully it will also make you feel cozy in your way.

please enjoy LESBIAN ROLLER COASTER BARISTA GETS ME OFF: A TRANS BUCKAROO TALE

Olivia is a trans woman enjoying her morning walk when she suddenly feels a sharp pain in her back. After collapsing, she’s rushed to the hospital to find that she’s passing a kidney stone. The doctor immediately recommends Olivia ride a roller coaster to help shake the stone loose, but thanks to a recent worldwide pandemic, all amusement parks are closed.

Fortunately, after the pain subsides Olivia heads to a chocolate milk shop where the barista just so happens to be a sentient roller coaster. She ends up taking a ride, which does much more than just cure her kidney stone.

Now these two are embarking on a thrilling erotica adventure that will have you screaming for more.

This erotic tale is 4,100 words of sizzling lesbian human on sentient roller coaster action. It features a trans woman who will acknowledge the genitals she connects less with, but only once to explain that she does not want them mentioned again, and one cis woman.

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LESBIAN ROLLER COASTER BARISTA GETS ME OFF: A TRANS BUCKAROO TALE

By Chuck Tingle

To say the world has changed a lot since the trotting plague has started would be an understatement. Honestly, I don’t think I’ve experienced such a monumental, worldwide shift in my lifetime, and I’d bet there won’t be one as big after.

I suppose that’s what happens when a virus that makes you dance for weeks on end sweeps the planet, changing even the simplest interactions that we take for granted into dangerous transmission points.

The trotting plague itself is bad enough, but the economic fallout has only made matters worse. I used to work in a large office building across town, and recently we’ve switched over to online work to avoid physical contact. To be honest, I kinda enjoyed this new arrangement at first, allowed to take care of my normal duties while sitting on the couch in my apartment with a cold cup of chocolate milk in my hands. However, as time marched on this lifestyle started to get a little monotonous.

I guess I took for granted the mental relief of waking up and getting out of the house every weekday, the fact that going somewhere else to do your work is a little annoying but also kinda nice. This mental separation is something I took for granted.

Nowadays, it would be nice to have any job at all. As of last week, the company I work for has let me go completely.

What used to be an afternoon of spreadsheets and paperwork has become an afternoon of reading a walking, strolling around my neighborhood in a mask as I struggle to figure out what comes next.

In an effort to keep my brain sharp and my health prioritized, I’ve decided to start every morning with a walk to the chocolate milk shop down the street. Today is the first such day, and so far I’m more than thrilled with this decision.

The morning feels fresh and exciting, the sun just barely creeping up to peek its head over the horizon line and cast the world in in a glowing bath of long shadows. There’s a few other folks out at this early hour, most of them jogging by or walking their dogs, but for the most part the streets are empty and still.

The chocolate milk shop is quite a few blocks away, but in this particular case I’m excited for the long journey. It’s a chance to breathe in the morning air and focus on the present, to simply exist in the moment.

I make sure there’s nothing ahead of me for a while and then close my eyes while I walk, taking note of the way my arms feel swinging by my side, the movement of my legs. I check in with each part of my body, completely at ease until I arrive at my lower back.

Suddenly, my eyes fly open. I stop walking and reach back with both hands, holding my sides and massaging the painful knot that I’ve discovered. It’s a strange sensation and as I struggle to figure out exactly what’s happening while it does nothing but grow. Soon enough, this pain is radiating across my body, buzzing horrifically within my back and abdomen, but also washing through my entire frame.

“What the fuck,” I stammer.

Not knowing what else to do, I take a few more steps, but each one causes me to wince and yelp. The pain is terrible, but along with the pain there’s something even more frustrating, a gnawing discomfort. It feels as though I simply cannot position by body in a way that alleviates the ache.

Finally, I lay down right there in the middle of the sidewalk, flat on my back as I stare up at the sky above.

“Ow,” I call out. “Ow!”

Moments later a man appears above me, the passerby gazing down over the mask that covers most of his face. His dog is very concerned, sniffing and licking me as I roll from side to side on the ground.

“Are you okay?” the man questions.

“Ow,” I reply, moaning loudly. “No.”
 “Do you want me to call an ambulance?” he continues.

I nod.

The man hops onto his phone and before I know it an ambulance has arrived to pick me up, brilliantly flashing lights and all. They load me onto a stretcher and take off toward the nearest hospital, all the while the pain within me growing and growing. Soon enough I’m thrashing about wildly, rolling back and forth as I groan and hold my back. Just when it feels as though my body simply cannot contain any more pain, the sensation gets heaped on even thicker than before.

“Oh my god, that is a lot of pain! That is a lot of pain” I cry out, stating the obvious in a way that’s so blunt it actually makes me laugh. “This is the worst. This is literally the worst.”

The ambulance arrives at its destination and the EMTs wheel me out, rushing me into an emergency room. I somehow muster up the strength to climb off the stretcher and take a seat on a nicely cushioned bench. I lay back and continue to moan as I wait for the doctor to see me, my cries getting louder and louder until suddenly, something utterly bizarre happens.

Without warning, the pain stops.

I sit up, utterly confused as I check in with my body.

The office door opens up and a doctor steps inside, smiling warmly. “Hi, I’m Dr. Jimbler and I’ll be helping you today. You much be Olivia. I hear you’ve been having some back pain?” she offers.

“Uh… I was,” I stammer. “It just disappeared though.”

“Okay then,” the doctor continues, getting to work. She feels around on my back, poking various areas until I yelp out in pain once more, the sensation flooding back for a split second and then disappearing again.

“Yep,” Dr. Jimbler continues with a nod. “Just as I suspected.”

“What is it?” I blurt.

“You’ve got a kidney stone,” she continues.

I furrow my brow. “What’s that?”

“Well, your kidneys have formed a mineral deposit that’s currently making its way to your bladder through a very small tube in your body,” Dr. Jimbler explains. “It’s going to be incredibly painful.”

“Is it done?” I question. “I feel better.”

“That’s because it stopped moving for a minute,” the doctor explains. “When it starts moving again you’ll know. It’s far from done.”

My eyes go wide, the anticipation of these horrific sensations continuing almost too much to bear. “What can I do?” I ask.

“We can give you some pain killers,” Dr. Jimbler explains, “but with pain like this, they can only do so much. Fortunately, the stone will eventually pass and you’ll be fine, but until then you’ll have to wait it out.”

“Wait it out?” I cry, blown away that this is the only solution. “I can’t wait it out! There’s gotta be something proactive I can do.”

“Well, there is one thing,” the doctor offers, considering my words for a moment.

“Anything,” I beg.

“Rollercoasters have been known to shake loose kidney stones,” Dr. Jimbler explains. “Many patients have passed their stone after riding on a roller coaster.”

My heart skips a beat as I hear this, thankful for the information and ready to get started. I live just a short drive from Tingleland, and I’m also the proud owner of a year pass. If hitting the amusement park is all I need to do to get through this terrible medical experience, then I’ve gotten off easy.

However, my excitement doesn’t last long.

“Of course, that’s why I didn’t want to mention it,” Dr. Jimbler continues. “With the trotting plague, all theme parks have been closed indefinitely.”

It feels as though I’ve been punched in the gut, all the excitement bursting from my lungs in a state of utter defeat. She’s absolutely right, and I’d completely forgotten until this very moment. Tingleland is closed, and all of the roller coasters along with it.

Dr. Jimbler hands me a bottle of pain pills. “Until then, try these when the sensation comes back. Oh, and that will be four hundred and fifteen thousand, forty one dollars and sixteen cents.”

“What?” I reply, just staring at her blankly.

“That will be four hundred and fifteen thousand, forty one dollars and sixteen cents,” Dr. Jimbler repeats.

“Even with my insurance?” I question. “I just lost my job but I’m covered until tomorrow.”

“Oh okay,” the doctor replies. “That’s a ten dollar copay then.”

I let out a sigh of relief, horrified by the absurdity of a system without universal healthcare and thankful that I made it in just under the wire. I stand up and hand my doctor a ten dollar bill, thanking her for her time and leaving.

I walk out of the doctor’s office in much better shape than when I arrived, but I’m still swimming in a state of utter fear.

It’s not going to be a happy day when the pain returns, and by then my insurance might be canceled.

“Fuck,” I say aloud to nobody in particular.

I decide to walk back to my neighborhood, and as the morning continues I find more and more people joining me on the streets. Eventually, the early day transforms into an afternoon, the city hustling and bustling around me as my cloud of nervous apprehension remains.

What if I collapse again? What if these pain killers aren’t enough? What if my kidney stone gets stuck and never leaves?

These thoughts continue to pile up within me, each one of them weighing me down just a little bit more. Each footstep I take seems to grow slightly heavier, until finally, I stop.

I can’t live like this, I realize. I was having an absolutely wonderful morning, at least given the circumstances, and now all of that has crumbled. Yet, I’m still here, and right now I’m not in pain. Sure, the pain might come later, but I’d rather enjoy my life while I can.

I start walking again, only I alter course slightly. Instead of heading back home, I’ve decided to make the chocolate milk shop my destination. There’s no reason to change my plans today.

I hold my head up high, and keep moving forward.

It takes a while, but eventually the chocolate milk shop comes into view. I can’t help but smile when I see it, previously assuming this just wasn’t in the cards today.

I put on my face mask and pull open the door to head inside and make my order.

Immediately, I stop, utterly shocked at what I see.

There behind the counter, working on drinks and taking orders, is a beautiful, bright blue roller coaster. She’s quite long, snaking around the whole building and crafted to immaculate precision. She wears a brilliant smile that instantly puts me at ease.

At first, I can’t help but wonder why she isn’t wearing a mask, but then I remember this virus only effects humans, not living objects.

I get in line, making sure to stand at least six feet away from the people waiting ahead of me, as this is the general distance recommended for trotting plague safety. I try my best to act natural, but it’s hard to keep my gaze from drifting back to the beautiful thrill ride over and over again.

Of course, the incredible coincidence that a roller coaster has entered my life right after my unexpected diagnosis is not lost on me, and that alone is caused me to literally tremble with anticipation. Heaped on top of that, however, is the simple fact that this sentient object is breathtakingly good looking.

The line slowly begins to move forward, customers making their orders and the continuing on their way until, finally, the roller coaster motions toward me and I approach the counter.

I see from her name tag that her name is Sarah. “Hi Sarah,” I begin, the words coming out of my throat unnaturally cool and collected given the circumstances.

“Hi there,” she replies with a smile. “What can I get started for you?”

Suddenly, my mind goes blank. I was so concerned with my initial introduction that I’d completely forgotten to consider my chocolate milk request.

“Oh, sorry,” I stammer, glancing up at the board above her. I typically go for the two percent, but suddenly that seems so basic and boring. This roller coaster is a barista for crying out loud, I need to show her that I know what I’m talking about when it comes to the frothy brown beverage.

“I’ll take a soy hot chocolate milk,” I finally blurt.

“Soy hot,” the roller coaster repeats back with a smile.

She begins to write down my order. “So how’s your day going?” the thrill ride questions.

I can’t help but laugh. “Actually, not great. I was walking over here earlier and I collapsed in pain. Turns out I have a kidney stone.”

Sarah’s eyes go wide. “I’m so sorry,” she gushes. “I know all about kidney stones.”

“You get them?” I ask.

The roller coaster shakes her head. “When you ride a roller coaster it can help them come loose,” she explains. “It sounds crazy, I know, but it’s a real thing.”

“To bad all the amusement parks are closed,” I reply.

Sarah hesitates, then continues onward. ‘I get off in an hour,” she finally offers. “You should meet me out front.”

My heart skips a beat as I hear this. Clearly, she’s ready to offer some advice about my medical condition, which is already enough to get excited about, but there’s the slightest hint in this beautiful roller coaster’s tone that makes me think I might be in for something more.

“Oh, and that’s five dollars and eighteen cents,” Sarah continues.

I’d completely forgotten we were in the middle of a financial transaction, immediately snapping back into reality as I reach into my pocket and pull out seven bucks. I hand them over and leave the change as a tip, then step off to the side so Sarah can help the next customer.

When I get my drink I stroll outside and find a table far from anyone else, waiting for my meeting with the gorgeous thrill ride.

Unfortunately, as I sit here sipping from my cup, I begin to feel that same horrible sensation as before blossoming up within me. The discomfort begins to grow, slowly transforming into a dull radiating pain.

The longer I sit, the worst it gets, and soon after I toss two pain pills in my mouth I begin to realize these efforts are futile. These drugs do nothing in the face of this awful looming sensation.

“Oh fuck,” I literally blurt out loud, bending over slightly and clutching my stomach.

Suddenly, I hear a faint rumbling. I glance over to see Sarah rolling up next to me, the beautiful coaster cruising along a track that I hadn’t noticed until now. I’d been so preoccupied with my own situation that I didn’t see these rails snaking up and around the building.

The sentient roller coaster notices my expression and immediately springs into action. “Get on,” she commands.

I do as I’m told, climbing up into the front car and barely having enough time to buckle my seatbelt before the vehicle begins slowly pushing forward.

We round the corner of the chocolate milk shop and I find myself face to face with an enormous hill in the track, the vehicle traveling upward as it rattles loudly below me. It looks like this is going to make for one hell of a drop when I reach the end.

“What’s your name?” the roller coaster questions.

“I’m Olivia,” I offer.

“And how are you feeling?” the vehicle continues.

“Terrible,” I admit.

“Well, hold on tight,” she offers. “We’ll see what we can do.”

Higher and higher we go until, eventually, I’m peering down over the side of the cab at the chocolate milk shop below. I can see a glorious view of the whole neighborhood from up here, which is both thrilling and terrifying, but I suppose that’s exactly what makes a great roller coaster.

At long last, my cab crests over the top of the hill, swiftly picking up speed as I plummet downward. I throw my hands up and let out a frantic scream as me and Sarah rocket through a corkscrew shape and then two enormous upside down loops. Next, we shoot forward through the chocolate milk shop parking lot and curve down the street.

All the while, the vehicle below me is rattling hard, vibrating my body from head to toe. It only takes a few seconds before the pain within me stops. I feel very strange, but I’m certain of one thing.

The stone has made its next stop of this journey.

When the roller coaster eventually pulls back into the place where it picked me up, I climb out of the car and rush inside. I hurry into the bathroom, then moments later emerge with a huge smile plastered across my face.

“It worked!” I cry out, so elated that I don’t care who hears me. The whole chocolate milk shop turns to look, clearly confused by my outburst.

When I get back outside Sarah is there waiting for me. “Am I good or am I good?” she asks with a laugh.

“You’re great,” I reply, throwing my arms around the living roller coaster and holding her tight.

When we finally pull away from one another I can’t help shaking my head from side to side in amazement. “It’s crazy how our own bodies can betray us,” I offer.

“But with the help and support of our loved ones, we can get through it,” Sarah replies.

“Is that a metaphor for something?” I question.

The sentient roller coaster shrugs.

The two of us stare at one another for a moment, sharing more with our expressions than words even could. The erotic tension is heavy, and seconds later it breaks as the two of us lock in a passionate kiss.

When our lips finally break away, Sarah makes an exciting offer. “You wanna take another ride?” she questions. “Last time was work, this time is pleasure.”

“Pleasure?” I question, intrigued by her offer.

“I can vibrate the cars a little more if you’d like,” the roller coaster explains.

“Oh,” I blurt, realizing what she’s saying. “That sounds very nice, but I don’t know if it’s going to work like that for me. I’m trans.”

“There are options,” the roller coaster continues.

I raise an eyebrow, intrigued. I clear my throat. “I’ll tell you this up front, and I’ll only say it once, don’t call what I have down there a cock. You can rub it and vibrate it and suck on it, but that is my clit. It just so happens to be positioned on the front of my body.”

“Understood,” Sarah replies with a firm and respectful nod. “Well then, there are options for your clit, regardless of where it’s located.”

The prospect is incredibly exciting, my heart now slamming hard within my chest. I look over to see the door of the coaster swing open.

I approach it slowly.

“Take off your clothes,” the living vehicle instructs, stopping me in my tracks.

I do as I’m told, stripping down right then and there. I toss my clothes into the back seat and then climb in up front.

“Turn around,” the roller coaster continues, taking me through the process in a matter of fact, step-by-step way that feels powerful and direct. Her authoritative tone is incredibly hot, a turn-on that I’d never known I had until this very moment.

I rotate so that I’m facing backward in the coaster, noticing there’s a space between the seat and its cushion.

“Put your clit in there,” Sarah demands.

“Yes, ma’am,” I reply, following her instructions perfectly.

The second I assume this position the roller coaster begins its journey with a loud, metallic clang. I begin to follow the same track as before, winding up and around the coffee shop but facing backward this time. The prospect of doing the whole ride this way is terrifying, to be honest, and the only thing keeping me grounded is the fact that I’m already experiencing a distinct tingle across my body. As the roller coaster begins its second ascent it vibrates steadily, filling me with a sense of pleasure that blooms at the pit of my stomach.

“Hold on tight,” Sarah offers playfully as we crest the top of the hill.

The next thing I know, I’m swooping down the other side as the beautiful sentient vehicle roars along her track. We twist and turn through the same corkscrews and loops as before, only this time the trembling of the rails is delivered directly into my body. I’m aching with pleasure, moaning loudly as I grip the seat before me. It’s not long before I begin to feel the first hints of an aching orgasm blossom, the climax looming closer and closer as I continue to ride.

Before I have a chance to get there, however, the roller coaster rolls to a stop.

I glance around to find that we haven’t reached the end of our journey, instead stopping halfway through the trip in some nearby garden. The place is private and pleasant, perfect for us to get some alone time.

“Come around to the front,” Sarah offers. “Let me rub that pussy of yours.”

I withdraw from the seat and stand up, then climb out of the cab. Already aching with arousal, I saunter to the front of the roller coaster where she’s watching with lustful eyes, looking my nude body up and down.

I climb down into position before the living vehicle, opening up my legs and allowing Sarah to work her magic on a more personal level. The ride was fun, but I want to see her up close.

Clearly, the feeling is mutual. The sentient roller coaster immediately gets down to business, rubbing me gently at first and then gradually picking up speed. The two of us make out passionately as she rubs me with her hand, then gradually her attention begins to drift lower and lower across my body. The gorgeous coaster kisses her way across my neck and shoulders, then down onto my breasts, playing with them a bit before moving onward. She drifts down to my waistline, hovering here for a moment as she teases me and then finally crossing the border or my hips.

At this point, her fingers are replaced with her mouth as the vehicle sucks my clit.

“Oh fuck,” I groan, throwing my head back in a state of utter bliss. “That feels so fucking good. Don’t stop, don’t stop!”
 Sarah heeds my calls, not letting up for a second. Thanks to my earlier ride, I was already fairly close, and soon enough I’m cumming hard. A frantic cry escapes my lips, like that you’d hear on the most thrilling part of an amusement park ride, and moments later I collapse back onto the ground.

The roller coaster swallows and then smiles, happy to provide me with such and incredible orgasm.

My pussy aches and I feel incredible, but I’m certainly not finished. In fact, I feel more energized than ever.

I stand up and begin to stroll along the length of the roller coaster, dragging my hand across her long body with seductive grace. I can feel Sarah trembling below me at the mere touch of my fingertips.

“What are you doing?” she questions, glancing back over her shoulder.

“You made me scream,” I reply. “Now I get to make you scream.”

I finally reach the back cab of the roller coaster, dropping down into a squat and finding the sentient vehicle’s pussy waiting for me. Without hesitation I get to work, diving in with my mouth and lapping away at her. I start with long, firm movements, then eventually gather my focus as I tickle her clit with my tongue. I move my oral muscle back and forth in a rapid pattern across her most sensitive area, paying close attention to how the roller coaster’s body reacts.

The rails below us start to hum as Sarah trembles and quakes, the pleasant sensations within her building. “Just like that, just like that,” the roller coaster repeats over and over again, the mantra escalating in volume as it spills out from between her lips.

I keep up the pace, eventually adding my fingers to the mix as I slip two digits within. The roller coaster is bucking hard now, threating to bounce right off the rails.

Suddenly, her entire body pulls tight and releases in unison, a spastic wave of orgasm running the length of her mechanical body. Sarah cries out loudly and then finally relaxes, utterly satisfied.

I stand up and walk around to the front of the vehicle, wrapping my arms around her and giving her a kiss on the lips.

“That was amazing,” I gush. “Thanks for your help.”

“Likewise,” Sarah replies. “That was the best orgasm of my life.”

I wait a beat, not quite sure where to go from here. The silence between us continues to stretch out longer and longer, both hesitating as our minds flood with a variety of unspoken thoughts.

“Well, I guess I should hop a ride back to the chocolate milk shop,” I finally offer.

“You know, I don’t have to stay on one track,” Sarah replies.

“Really?” I blurt. “I thought that’s how roller coasters worked.”

“Nobody has to stay on the track fate drops them onto,” Sarah informs me. “Just because we’re born onto a certain rail, it doesn’t mean that’s the right track for us. We get to choose our own path, and this is what makes everyone special, important and unique. Your soul is what makes you who you are, not the track it happened to end up on.”

“Wait… is that a metaphor?” I question.

The roller coaster shrugs again. “Hop on,” Sarah continues, ignoring my question. “Let’s tell the tracks laid out for us to fuck off and have an adventure.”

I laugh, climbing into the front cab. “I like the sound of that.”

The sentient coaster hoists herself up and off of the rails then begins to slither on down the street.

I gently rub the seat next to me as I ride, thankful to be on this journey.


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