Unexpected jump to book 5

I was wrapping up my day this morning at 3am--making note of my word count, writing a summary of the day's work, and notes for the next day, when Roth started talking. 

The chapter I've been working on was originally a scene that showed their daily routine at this point in their marriage (still early stages). I didn't want every chapter to have something dramatic or emotional. I wanted a breather chapter where you could just watch them be themselves. 

My intentions didn't pan out and turned into something else. Something that left me feeling uneasy and out of sorts because, as usual, it wasn't planned. I was following them around like a creepy videographer documenting their relationship and this scene took a turn into something that wasn't remotely casual or mundane. I wrapped up the chapter last night, wondering if I would even keep it in for the final when Roth started to talk. 

I opened up a fresh page in his book and spent about a half hour jotting down what he was saying and fell into bed where he continued to confess what she was doing to him. Gah. And that's how I started my day. Documenting where he is right now in their journey.

I can't share too much because it reveals too much about what's going on, but these are a handful of lines I liked from his monologue:

He looked down at her. She was fast asleep in his arms. She trusted him. She shouldn’t. He didn’t trust himself where she was concerned. 

His wildest daydreams didn’t come close to the reality of her. 

The temptation to lose himself in her was a drumbeat in his blood. Unleashing his demons and having her welcome them with open arms, accepting all that darkness and exorcising his demons while purifying him in the process was fast becoming an addiction. 

**This is a raw draft of Bitter Confessions. Please do not share or distribute.

Currently at 128k words in the manuscript and still in what I consider the first third of the book, but we're making progress!