shaq

The Worst Stream I've Ever Done

I wanted to see if I could identify a variety of fruits blindfolded, but something went terribly wrong and it ruined the entire stream. This video is the only good that came from an afternoon wasted. Please enjoy.

Carne Asada Early Access & Notes

• I don't think I've ever planned a video far enough ahead to post it according to a holiday, but it just so happens that the party I threw led to this video going up right before Cinco de Mayo. Out of all the culturally significant and/or food-focused holidays, THIS was the one??? I'm shakin my dam head.
• I'm not one to know much about the delicate differences between various cuts of beef, but boy howdy does the fat on this arrachera taste so profoundly delicious when grilled ove...
  2022-05-04 00:59:20 +0000 UTC View Post

Interview with Alabama Deathwalk

Twitch VODs are way too long, and they self-destruct after a couple weeks. Here's an edited version of my chat with Alabama Deathwalk that can live on forever

There's a lot of bonus content in here!

Here's where to start

Depending on your rewards, you my see this feed and be overwhelmed with all the early access notes, bonus videos, and announcements. I tagged my favorite posts with #bestof, including this one, so that you can click the tag and get straight to the good stuff. Most of the #bestof posts are bonus videos, but I do have a couple text-post favs for the $3 patrons too. Give it a click, and again, welcome to this community :)

Intuition Early Access & Notes

This script was a hard one to stop writing, because of the interconnected nature of cooking decisions. The thin steak I showed needs to be cooked over high heat, and that high heat would dictate that you can't dust the meat with spices, lest they burn. The same would go for a sugary marinade. But the parameters I drew for myself were "those are markers of smart cooking. This is just about ~intuition~."

This video could be a massive flop because it's too obtuse, but I hope it can bring a...

My Cooking Has Changed Due to Meat Prices

At this point, if I'm buying meat it's probably going to be ground beef (which is like $6 per pound now!!!). If I'm buying chicken, the bones and the skin are staying on. Normally I don't go for these two meat offerings, and when I do it's to make burgers or lemony chicken over potatoes. But now that I'm buying them more often, I've found that Kroger's latest store-brand offerings are helping me not burn out on them.

I'm Banned from Using Two Words

This is a story about why I try not to use two specific words, and why I've never felt comfortable calling myself a "creator".

https://youtube.com/shorts/ntQXm0XJnn0

I Am Hopelessly Deluded, and So Can You!

just a 14-minute ranty-doo-dah for today :)

On Bad Publicity

The very first YouTube Short I ever posted now has over 7 million views, and it exists as a permanent reminder of how the only valid way to "make things better is to make better things". It feels good to see a slam dunk quote tweet like "actually ur wrong plus L plus ratio" but ever since this whole pepper cannon story unfolded, I've significantly reduced the amount of reaction or response-based entertainme...

April Fool's Day 2022

I'm gonna wager that 90% of you don't want tomorrow's video spoiled, but you pay for early access and by joe, you're gonna get it. 

• The placeholder word I was using for the intro was "crunchy". I thought maybe the "cr" sound was nice and ambiguous since it could be "crazy" or "crappy"
• I didn't actually get to eat any of these as intended. I spent a day shooting B-Roll and by the time I got the shots of me eating them, they were throat-sandingly dry and crumbly
<...
2022-03-31 16:30:10 +0000 UTC View Post

Is This a Podcast

If anything in VR counts as a metaverse then anything in which I talk for more than 5 minutes is a podcast. (Click the tag below to see the new ever-growing "best of" collection)

Banana Puddin' Notes

• Out of all the options presented, I think the most delicious one is to make the basic pudding from recipe 1 and whip your own cream like in recipe 2. Bananas are so sweet, and I think taking the regular pudding box instructions for pudding don't need to be any sweeter.
• This was my first time having a big plate full of Nilla Wafer crumbs, and I never knew how satisfying it was to hork down a big spoonful of the crumbs.
• I made these puddings on Super Bowl Sunday. I gave ...
  2022-03-10 03:22:01 +0000 UTC View Post

Oleosaccharum Notes

• One of the screenshots shown in which I'm offered fruit is actually from Arizona's most iconic home garden, and I'm truly TOUCHED by the opportunity to sample his fruit. Read more about the garden in this NYT article that just dropped: https://www.nytimes.com/2022/02/28/dining/rare-fruit-garden-arizona.html
• I'll probably change this title a dozen times but I'm still ...
  2022-03-02 17:38:26 +0000 UTC View Post

Early Access - Failing to Roast a Coffee Brand

Do you think that posting 2 shorts back to back is some kind of rubicon-crossing that turns me into a ~shorts creator~ or something?

Early Access - Making My Own Plates

• Once I have at least 6 dinner plates and 6 salad plates, I'll move on to shot glasses or something else. For now, I still can't shake my desire for handmade plates.
• I love the blue glaze I showed in the cracked plate, but I know I shouldn't make as many of those since they won't look great on camera.
• My newest clay is "buff" colored, so it will look like the one I showed at the end, but a light tan instead of darker terra cotta brown.
• After all this effort, pe...
  2022-02-17 16:58:22 +0000 UTC View Post

Talking About the Stripper Manager for the Last Time

There are only like 10 people who know all of this information. Welcome to da trauma dump, baby

Smoker Early Access & Notes

• I'm so happy to be done with this video. I've had three smokers in my yard this whole time, and it's been maddening. They take up more space than you might think. Bree will be happy to come home to one less, since as soon as I uploaded this, I gave the Camp Chef to an ex coworker.
• I recorded that coworker loading his new Camp Chef into his truck and put it in the video. That one is BY FAR the lightest, and he seriously hurt his back doing this. I'm glad his pain was at least im...
  2022-02-10 00:12:25 +0000 UTC View Post

I quit!

As Ringo Starr once said:

This is a SERIOUS message to everybody watching my update right now peace and love peace and love thank you thank you

Jamaica Early Access & Notes

• Figuring out a title for this one is gonna be a toughie, since Jamaica is spelled, well, like that.
• I only made two quarts for this video, but right after I finished, I made another two gallons and kept it in a glass jar in the fridge. Dipping into that big ol' jug with a ladle made it feel like I was enjoying a big agua fresca at Pro's Ranch Market.
• Be careful with the flowers once they've reconstituted. They have extreme staining power.
• I usually take my ice...
  2022-02-03 18:54:46 +0000 UTC View Post

Early Access: Ugly Short

The Jamaica video is almost done, so please enjoy this short to hold you over.Also, a sincere thank you for being here :) For all creators the first day of any month is when most people cancel their patreon subscriptions, so I appreciate you for finding this valuable for at least another month.

Early Access - Ceviche Negro

• This video is going live on Wednesday the 26th. If you leave a comment on the youtube video with the word "Patreon" in it before it goes live, I'll pick two people and mail you my extra chilmole. (In order to comply with Patreon terms of service, this will be a skill-based competition and not a random selection)
• I'm glad it didn't come down to me making my own recado negro, but it was getting close. I gathered the ingredients as well as a manual grinder, but watching videos of ...
  2022-01-24 23:11:19 +0000 UTC View Post

Complaining About a TV Show for 13 Minutes

The number of scripted series hit an all-time high in 2021 but do they all stink? I am no longer releasing a gallon of fever sweat every night so maybe I won't have to stay home watching TV for much longer.

The Only YouTube Video I've Ever Deleted

• Here's a link to the video I unpublished: https://youtu.be/l538KQIl0YE
• I can't believe I argued online with a guy who has an anti-communist anime girl avatar. This is truly my darkest moment.
• The bright side of all this is discovering that the comments are what I care most about, which is nice because I hope to never become such a big stats-watcher than I track my "RPM"
• I haven't had so much ...
  2022-01-14 03:31:52 +0000 UTC View Post

Internet Shaquille Formative Media

During the period in which I was tracking all my low-effort meals, I was also writing down the names of any media that had a permanent and recognizable influence on my work today. This is that list, in alphabetical order:

• AdamJK
  I barely found out that all the music I used to dance to in college is now retroactively categorized as "bloghouse", so brace yourself to be like "damn this old man really used to read a lot of blogs". Anyway, I came to know ab...
  2022-01-03 23:56:19 +0000 UTC View Post

The Masculine Urge to Give Up & Live in the Woods

I don't know if I'll actually post this to YouTube. I thought about the concept during the latest all-night puppy piss session and Bree is out sick so I had the time to put this together. Happy new year. I hope you either learn something new, or accept that you don't need constant self-improvement to find peace :)

Final Captain's Log 2021

Some questions explored:

• Why does every white wedding I've been to break out into one of those dance circles where someone is expected to perform a cool dance in the center?
• Should I strive to be an artist or a company?
• Which pan brand stinks extra bad lately?
• How can I continue learning my new DJ hobby without repeating all my songs?
• Where da fuk is that email I warned you about??

Super Early Access - What to Eat When You Can't Cook

• This video will go live in January. Get your "first" comment in now.
• I made that smoothie and felt really sick afterwards for a whole weekend. I honestly thought that my banana allergy (which does nothing more than tickle my throat) has strengthened into something debilitating. Turns out I was just using extremely old super-rancid almondmilk, which I discovered last night while enjoying a cookie. Hehe whoops.
• I fully expected that soup to be ~just okay~ the first time ...
  2021-12-21 16:03:21 +0000 UTC View Post

You're Getting Seeds!

$6+ patrons will get an email asking for their address soon. This is why. 

Impressive Cocktail Notes

• I shot this in the middle of a Dry December. I've been trying to give away a glass of punch to anyone who comes near me. I have delicious booze all around me and I haven't had a single glug of it.
• I'm worried that I came off as too dismissive of the drinking vessel based traditions. My point is that they taste just as good, but I think getting to the point at which you say "man this just doesn't feel quite right without the special cup" is a pleasure all its own. I know if some...
  2021-12-17 02:24:31 +0000 UTC View Post

Honeymoon Short Early Access

Boy howdy I'm really crankin' out the content, aren't I?