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UselessTimidityVA

UselessTimidityVA

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UselessTimidityVA posts

Update: Feb 2025

Hi TimTams! I have been super busy behind the scenes. I have officially just made my move into a new city and a new home! I'm in the process of revamping my home studio (I've ordered a new, higher quality microphone and a few things to DIY a vocal booth so that audio quality is even better!). I've also been making a few purchases and plans to... ahem... expand (take that how you will 😈)

SFW audio for January will be coming early next week once the new setup is complete. I will also ...

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Rain - Sleep Token (Cover)

Here it is! The result of the cover poll taken what feels like forever ago. I've bought a few more tools to step up my audio editing game with, so I hope that the difference is noticeable. šŸ’œ

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[M4F] Christmas Cums Late (But I Don't!) [Msub] [Fantasy] [Christmas] [Secretary Elf] [Comedic] [Corporate Snark] ['Making it up to you'] [Unwrapping Your 'Gift'] [Size Difference] [Kissing] [Handjob] [Cunnilingus] [Standing Face Sitting] [Riding] [Needy] ['Good Boy' Mentions] [Begging] [Creampie] [SFX]

The irony of the title is not lost on me at all. I think I might just stop giving dates for audios as an inevitable jinx.

'Due to several... ahem... delays in production, we regret to inform you that you have been selected to have a late Christmas this year. Worry not though! One of our top elves has been assigned to you to make sure that we make up for this teeny tiny mistake. He may have a little bit of attitude, but we know all that what you really want for Christmas is to put hi...

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Update: What's been happening and what to expect!

Hey TimTams!

I know it has been a long time since my last post, and I’d like to offer an explanation as to why.

I may have mentioned previously in passing, but I have had several health issues cropping up over the previous months. I have a rather weak immune system, and was hit with tonsillitis, a sinus infection, and a bout of COVID almost back to back. Needless to say, that took me out of commission for a while, and once I had recovered, I had a massive workload that I had to ...

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Update + Sleep Token Cover Poll

Hey TimTams!~

Just a little update on my end, SFW and one of the two NSFW audios will be dropping closer to the end of the week, so keep an eye out for those!

I will be recording another Sleep Token cover to post on the Patreon, and I though I would let you guys pick which song I covered. I tried to pick one for ages but honestly I really like them all, and I thought you guys might like a say in what you'll be hearing!

I'll also be posting a shorter version of 'Take Me Back...

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[M4F] The Ritual [Msub] [Fantasy] [Story] [Ritual] [Himbofication] [Magical Aphrodisiac] [Taking Turns] [Cunnilingus] [Spitting] [Rough] [Exhibitionism] [Humiliation] [Chants] [Slapping] [Begging] [Edging] [Face Sitting] [Hair Pulling] [Cum Denial] [Worship] [On his Knees] [Mind Break] [Mistress] [Goddess] [Worship] [Overstim] [Pent-Up] [Mounting] [Desperate] [SFX]

It's not quite spooky season just yet, but I was feeling a bit of fantasy! (And a lot of MSub~)

There is a cult that worships the wild and carnal nature of the fae, and they hold ceremonial feasts that end in a summoning ritual every spring equinox. One lucky young man is picked to be the offering to their goddess, but before they can present him to the great Faun, they must prepare his body and mind.

This audio was written and scripted by the wonderful @miragewrites! Che...

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[M4F] A Helping Pair of Hands [Gentle MDom] [Erotic Massage] [Sweet] [Professional] [Reassurance] [Lots of Check-Ins] [Oiled Up] [Rubbing You Down] [Teasing] [Praise] ['Good Girl's] [Fingering] [Messy Pussy Eating] [Condom Use] [Kissing] [Finishing Together] [SFX]

Thank you for your patience once again! Gahh, I feel like the moment I announce the date an audio is supposed to arrive the universe sends something without fail to end up pushing it back. For my own sanity I think from now on I'll let the audio release dates be a surprise. šŸ˜…

'Your friend has gifted you with a voucher for a 'Full Package' with a nearby masseuse. However, after a bit of researc...

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[M4F] Tokyo Midnights [Switch] [Strangers to Lovers] [Hotel Bar] [Executive Daddy] [Flirting] [Business or Pleasure] [Teasing] [Power Struggle] [Lap-Sitting] [Kissing] [Suit Stripping] [CFNM] [Spanking] [Grinding] [Cunnilingus] [Face-Sitting] [Condom Use] [Riding] [Aftercare] [SFX]

First and foremost, sincerest, sincerest apologies for the delays on my part. Burnout is very not fun, and whenever I felt like I was ready to come back an finish a project, something came up IRL to delay me from being able to work further. I genuinely appreciate your patience and support so much, and I am endeavouring to create a much more consistent release schedule for you guys, as you rightfully deserve. There are more audios coming up to make for the ones that I've missed, which I will o...

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EARLY ACCESS The Red Dove - Part Two: The Hammer [M4F] [Multi-Part Series] [MSub] [Noir] [Homme Fatale] [Slow Burn] [Patching You Up] [Cracking the Case] [A Common Enemy] [Appreciation] [Pleading to Stay] [Kissing] [Make Me Pure] [Begging] [Gasping] [Panting] [Blowjob] [Cunnilingus] [Riding] [Backstory] [Singing You to Sleep] [SFX]

It's finally here! AHHH!! Thank you so much for your patience while this has been in production. It has been one of my heftier audios, both in terms of story and production requirements, but I'm hoping to release the third and final part in a much shorter timeframe than between parts one and two.

'It had been weeks since I'd last seen her. The Blue. Though, truth be told, it felt like months. Months upon months of silence. Of waiting. Of unanswered questions. Maybe it would have been f...

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Update: 'We'll Do It Live' is now off platform

Hey all! Just to be safe in keeping with Patreon's terms of service (it's in kind of a grey area but I'd rather be safe than sorry), I have removed my most recent audio from the platform!

Don't worry, you can still find it here: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1R3DX1nNoLAzUnn140WE0BgBH84rHIiSE?usp=sharing

In future, any Stream of Consciousness conte...

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[M4F] Southern Peach [Gentle MDom] [BFE] [Southern Accent] [Domestic Bliss] [Farmer's Wife] [Playful] ['Lil Mama'] [That One Sundress] [Kissing] [Caressing] [Curvy Appreciation] [Body-Licking] [Cunnilingus] [Fucking From Behind] [Creampie] [L-Bombs]

Disclaimer: This audio has elements of plus-size/curvy appreciation, including specific mentions of and actions towards the thighs, ass and stomach.

I'm back! Sorry for the long silence, I've been both sick and busy over the last couple of weeks, most likely with me being busy leading to me being sick. Nevertheless, I'm back with the first of a package of audios coming for Ruby patrons, as I know I'm backed up a couple of audios for Ruby tier. Please be assured, they're on the way!
...

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SFW - [M4A] Your Cherub Matchmaker [Comedy] [Cherub] [Sassy Assistant] [Gum Chewing, Energy Drink Sipping] [Office Setting] [Workplace Jargon] [Helping You Find Love] [Not-so-Silently Judging You] [Likes and Dislikes] [Playful to Serious] [Past Relationship Trauma] [Comfort] [Love Advice] [Reassurance] [Self-Confidence Encouragement] [Sweet Ending] [SFX]

Guys-- This... might be my favourite SFW I've ever done. This was so much fun to record and conceptualise, and I loved playing this character so much! It's just a feel good type of audio to round out Valentine's Day~

'You've come to a Matchmaking agency looking for love. This agency is run by Cupid's cherubs, so they're the best of the best... or at least, one of them is. According to him.'

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[M4F] Valentine's Day - Flower Delivery [MSub] [Strangers to Lovers] [Special Delivery] [Surprise Gifts] [Wrong Address] ['How Can I Make it Up to You?'] [Instant Loss] [To The Point] [Cunnilingus] [Messy] [Panting] [Begging] [Cowgirl] [Rough] [Bed Squeaks] [Pinning] [Biting] [Creampie] [Fucked Stupid] [SFX]

ā¤ļø Happy V Day Lovelies! ā¤ļø

The first of two drops is here, and the other should be arriving in a few hours. I was really in the mood to create something kind of silly, straight to the point and very, verrrrrrrry subby~ I hope you enjoy it!

'You've just received a surprise Valentine's Day gift. Lucky you!... Unfortunately, the...

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Patron Update | February 2024 (+ Useless Rambles about Reality TV)

Happy Valentine's Day lovelies! ā¤ļø

I hope you're having a wonderful V-Day (or pre V-Day if you're a day behind). I just thought I would give an update regarding this month's releases and what you can expect coming up this week and next week.

I mentioned on my Twitter that I was thinking about posting a SFW ramble about reality TV as it's one of my specialist subjects, so I thought I would add that lit...

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[M4F] Planetary Relations (Tags Poll Winner!) [Sci-Fi] [Rivals to Lovers] [Diplomatic Arguing] [Arrogant] [Feuding Planets] [Apologising] [Soft Banter] [Giving in to Attraction] [Kissing] [Power Struggle] [Pinning] [Cunnilingus] [MDom to MSub] [Blowjob] [Begging] [Cowgirl] [Spanking/Slapping] [Creampie] [Overstim] [Accidental L-Bombs] [Cute Ending] [SFX]

Wowee! That's a lotta tags! Including the three tags most voted by you guys from the poll at the beginning of January (Power Struggle, MDom to MSub and Overstim!). Thank you all so much for your patience as I finished this off (RIP my editing headphones), I hope you find it worth the wait~.

'You are a delegate representing Venus at a meeting of the High Council of the Planets. You and a certain representative of Saturn have been butting heads at every turn, but when you find yourself n...

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The Red Dove - Part One [M4F] [Multi-Part Series] [MSub] [Noir] [Strangers to Lovers] [Homme Fatale] [Singing] [Jazz Club] [Slow Burn] [Backstory] [Cold at First] [Opening Up] [Reassurance] [Willing Corruption] [Gentle Pleading] [Oral Sex Only]

Well well well! My first series! I've been sitting on this idea for a while and I am so excited to be releasing the first part of it! Creating a series is a big endeavour but I feel like the new year has invigorated me, so I'm up to the task!

'You're a Private Investigator, who has been assigned a case that seems impossible to crack. A missing girl, a gambling debt gone wrong, and a jazz singer caught in the middle of all of it. How much is he really telling you?... And how much of it ...

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EARLY ACCESS - [MF4A] Tied up, Stalked and Dommed by Two Insatiably Horny Ghostfaces! [Facefuck] [Blowjob] [Handjob] [Fingering] [Cunnilingus] [Bondage] [Fdom] [Mdom] [Double Orgasm] [Facial] [No Penetration] - With LillithMorningstarr!

It's finally here! The reward audio for that little strip game Lil and I played during October/November (Please ignore us talking about halloween when it's JANUARY šŸ˜‚).

'You're all alone on Halloween night. Well... at least, you think you are~. Little do you know your two favourite VAs are lying in wait nearby, biding their time until the moment they give you that fateful phone call.

Enjoy!...

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New Year's Tags! - Poll

Hi lovelies!

I hope you've had a very happy and productive New Year so far. I'm currently working on the next early-access audio to post for you guys (which will also mark my return to GWA after a hot minute šŸ˜…).

However, in the meantime, I thought it'd be fun to give you all some input into the next exclusive audio that I create. And so, it's time for the first poll of 2024!

I will b...

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SFW - [M4F] Christmas Consolations [Story Based] [Strangers to ??] [Wedding] [Christmas Eve] [Jilted Ex-Boyfriend] [Hurt/Comfort] [Bad First Impressions] [Apologising] [Baggage Talk] [Realistic Hallmark Love Story] [Coping Talk] [Bonding] [Starting Fresh]

TW: This audio discusses certain aspects of mental health, particularly insecurity and low self-esteem.

So, not a typical Christmas audio (also, not Christmas anymore, apologies!), but I've been sitting on this idea for a while and I've really wanted to get it out into the world! It's potentially my favourite SFW that I've recorded, and is more open ended than others. Whether you'd like to interpret it romantically or platonically, it's up to you.

'You're the bridesmaid at a frie...

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Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas - Frank Sinatra Cover

Hey all! And MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

I hope that you are all doing well and having a very happy holidays. I have come out of covid isolation just in time to celebrate Christmas with my family, but I thought I'd record a little something for all of you lovely listeners. 

This last year has been an absolute blast and I want to thank all of you so so much for being a part of it with me!

Enjoy~ <3

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[M4F] Pegging Your BFF's Goth Little Brother [MSub] [Goth] [Tsundere] [Annoyed to Needy] [College Rumours] [Cam Model] [Watching Sex Streams Together] [Confession] [Kissing] [Slutty Hips] [Assplay] [Rimming] [Fingering] [Pegging] [Whimpering] [Panting] [Begging] [Pillow Biting] ['Daddy' Mentions] [Speaker Orgasm] [SFX]

My first pegging audio! I'll be honest, this was A. Really fun to do, and B. A challenge. Switching around the Sex FX and making them work was an interesting learning curve. Also, I think I have a particular fondness for playing tsundere twinks. First the cowboy, and now this! (In my head, they're distant cousins).

'Your BFF and her friend have ditched you to go to a frat party, leaving you alone with her surly, loner, goth little brother. What pleasant company. However, a little birdi...

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Two Cowboys for the Price of One [MM4F] [Gentle MDom & Gentle MSub] [Comedic] [Threesome] [Costumes] [Escorts] [Cowboy/Cow Boy] [Southern Accent] [Femboy] [Tsundere] [Bondage] [Guiding You] [Whimpering] [Begging] [Cunnilingus] [Double Penetration] [SFX]

First of all, the BIGGEST of apologies for the large delay. My intention was to have this recorded by Tuesday night once I had recovered from my stomach bug. Just my luck that I would sprain my shoulder and neck and then need to catch a flight the day after. Luckily, I'm now at my destination in NZ and have finally had the opportunity to finish editing. I hope that the end result was worth it!

'After your birthday party, your friend has sneakily ordered you a 'private entertainer' ...

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Delay on the Cowboys Audio

Hey all! I know that I had posted about a Friday release for Cowboys. Apologies for not having posted, I went to a Party on Thursday and fell ill the next few days with a stomach bug. I'm back up now and well enough to record the final parts needed, so expect it to be posted tonight/tomorrow morning depending on where you are!

Thanks for your patience!~

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SFW - Useless' ASMR Ramblings #1 [M4A] [ASMR] [Binaural] [Ear to Ear Whispering] [Rambling about:] [Dragula] [The Challenge] [Baldur's Gate 3] [Useless has a Crush on Karlach] [Trigger Words] [Breathy, Fast Whispering] [Relaxing]

So after the intensity of my Halloween Patreon audio, I thought it would be nice to switch gears and try some nice relaxing, ASMR content!

I hope you enjoy hearing me ramble about my love of reality TV, my hesitance about playing long video games and how I first came to listen to ASMR myself~

Let me know if you're interested in hearing more full on ASMR content in the future!

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A Deal With a Demon [M4A] [Halloween] [Horror] [JOI] [MDom] [Meta] [Fourth Wall Break] [Irish Demon] [Ritual] [Accidental Possession] [Growling] [Whispering] [Moaning] ['Let Me Consume You'] [Spatial Audio] [Aftercare/Check-Out] [SFX]

Content Warning: This audio is horror based, and as such contains sudden loud noises, horror FX, screaming and generally scary content as well as mentions of demons and a fictional summoning. Please only listen if you are in the right state of mind. 

I know halloween is over! This was a bit of a beast to edit, and I kept tweaking it back and forth until it felt just the right level of horrific meets realistic (for my taste).

Also! Fun fact: The other voice you hear at the sta...

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EARLY ACCESS - A New Kind Of Slasher [M4F] [Halloween] [MDom] [Consenting Roleplay] [Horror Villain] [Final Girl] [Primal] [Size Difference] [Hair Pulling] [Growling] [Piercings] [Deepthroating] [Cunnilingus] [Standing 69] [Rough] [Choking] [Creampie] [Character Break] [Aftercare] [Serious to Sweet]

This miiiiiiiight be the most feral I've gotten during an Mdom audio, which really is saying something.

'You're the final girl, hiding from the masked slasher who's been hunting you and your friends down. Little does he know, you're actually a fan of his, and simply want the reward that comes with outlasting all of the others~'.

My first halloween audio! This one was a lot of fun, especially the switch up at the end. I hope you enjoy~

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House of The Rising Sun - The Animals Cover

This is both a cover and a teaser! This song actually fits in an audio I will be releasing nearer to Halloween.

(Fun fact: this is also my go to karaoke song. That and Mr. Brightside, because obviously). 

Enjoy!

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Just A Peek - Uncensored Artwork (NSFW)

Here you go ya pervs! The uncensored version of the teaser I posted on Twitter earlier,

Art Credit to: @s1lentlurker on Twitter

Enjoy!~

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EARLY ACCESS - Just A Peek: A DILF Tale [M4F] [MDom] [DILF] [Voyeurism] [Nude Sunbathing] [Caught In The Act] [Teasing] [Come Get A Closer Look] [Degradation] [Check-Ins] [Fucking In The Hallway] [Handjob] [Blowjob] [Cunnilingus] [Pounding] [Against The Wall] [Watch Yourself Getting Fucked] [Finishing Outside] [One Kiss] [No Aftercare]

Here it is! My second DILF audio! (Just to note, this is not the DILF from 4 D's, he and Valerie's friend are having a very nice vacation right now in Quebec or something).

You've made it a habit to watch your hot older neighbour whenever you have the chance. You can't help it! He's just so tasty. One day, when you're passing by, you catch him... nude sunbathing?! Jackpot! Unfortunately for you, he catches you right back~.

Speaker refers to himself as Daddy, Listener i...

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SFW - A Little Wrastlin' Didn't Hurt Nobody [M4A] [Friends to Lovers] [Sweet & Fluffy] [Playful] [Teasing] [Quiet Night In] [College Students] [Video Game/Movie Talk] [A Bad Zangief Impression] [Play-Wrestling] [Kissing] [Romantic Confession] [Relationship Progression] [L-Bombs]

It's here! Apologies for the big delay (I feel like I've been doing that a lot as of late). I had actually recorded this a while ago, but listening back I liked the concept, just not my performance, and so I decided to re-record it from the beginning, and now I'm much more pleased to be sharing it with you lovely listeners!

You come over to visit your best friend after a busy day of studying to hangout and relax, a usual routine for the two of you. After some video games and a camp...

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