XaiJu
foxesinlove
foxesinlove

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Grumpy hours

I grew up in a household where the response to someone clearly being mad about something but refusing to say why was responded with either taking it personally, or by harrying the person who is mad for no reason until you've pried the truth out of them - or wrangled them into saying whatever they think you want to hear.

It's been so freeing being able to learn that people can just be in a bad mood for no particular reason in peace. That I can just be bummed out for no real reason without it becoming a fight, and that I can trust my boyfriend to tell me if I am the reason he is angry, and trust that he's telling the truth when he says it's not me. That I can trust that I can just respect his privacy and not wrangle an answer out of him if he'd rather not have me involved in things.

It's such a strange thing to learn for the first time as an adult. That you can just ask about things if you don't know, to be able to trust that the answer you're given is the truth, and that nobody will hold it against you if you reacr accordingly.

Grumpy hours

Comments

Being asked “are we problem solving, venting, or working through something alone, and would a hug help?” Is probably the best question my spouse has ever asked me. It’s so freeing.

Joules

*HUG*

Lauren Kramer


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