033. bullies & burnout
Added 2020-09-28 22:54:07 +0000 UTCHi y'all!! On this week's episode, I talk about a terrible comment I got on my video last week, as well as my current struggle with taking care of myself and my art. I just..want my body and brain to not be hurting all the time ahhhhh
Stuff is weird and hard right now, across the board, in loads of different ways, and we just have to keep figuring out ways to move forward, somehow. I love you so! And we are in this together xx
(Also a gentle reminder for my 18+ US folks to pls check your voter registration and solidify your voting strategy for November 3!)
Comments
OOOOOO MAN is this making me angry. chey, again and always, FUCK EM. you're working so so hard, this woman isn't your fucking therapist or school counselor
molly
2020-12-08 15:15:07 +0000 UTCLate to the party, catching up on the Patreon pod but I cried with you while I painted Christmas boxes last night and then this episode...that frickin lady. Get. A. Life. Bitch. Ugh. Cheyenne you have no idea how much you mean to people. We feel like we know you. We miss you when you tuck yourself away but we understand. You are loved. You are doing good in the world. And you are understood. The things you’re expressing...I feel it so hard. I miss you and I don’t even know you. I’ve binged your YouTube and when that and your Instagram weren’t enough, I became a Patron and I think I’m going to Twitch sub soon. Did you ever do the Patreon Discord? Sending love and catching up on the pod. -beck 💕🖤💞💫✨
Becca Johnson
2020-11-30 15:49:51 +0000 UTCTo echo everyone else, that lady is AWFUL. I actually became a Patron *because* your shop was currently partially-closed and I want to support your content and art and self on a more meaningful basis! 💕💕 Also heck yeah Hades and I hope you get your save file back!! I’ve been watching my fiancé play because I’m not quite skilled enough to handle it myself yet, still trucking my way through Celeste 🤷🏼♀️
Siri Elena
2020-10-08 21:40:46 +0000 UTCOhmy Chey! I was just listening to this episode on my phone and I just needed to open up my laptop and write to you here! I so really get you! Her comment just make my blood itch! You are amazing and she knows nothing! For my half, you are like a big sister to my and a role model. I deal with depression and you inspire me everyday. So I also know that its so easy to say positive things to ourselves but it is not easy to live with the black dogs. Okey, Im not really good at writing in english haha, but I just wanted to say something ❤️ Virtual hug from Iceland❤️❤️❤️
Alda Sigurðardóttir
2020-10-07 10:26:33 +0000 UTCAlso I sew for a living! I always mess up! I still struggle with getting in my own way, it’s never easy to deal with. But you can do it! Just do it and be bad! Eventually it’ll be fun and hard and you’ll move past it.
Bethany Kramer
2020-10-05 23:01:56 +0000 UTCI’m late, but fuck that lady. I think you’d enjoy my friend Bonnie’s work, @alchemybread she’s a bread baker, book author from my hometown.
Bethany Kramer
2020-10-05 22:49:05 +0000 UTCYou make me want to make sourdough bread.
Nicole Tihlarik
2020-10-04 16:16:06 +0000 UTCWow so sorry to hear about that woman. You have to believe that all of those mean comments were about her and her issues. You are very brave to share with everyone all that you do. What she did was flat out abusive and no one should have to deal with that. Just know that I think that you are wonderful and your videos help me to relax so much. I try to only watch a few a day because I just found your channel and I want to have something to look forward to everyday. She is just an unhappy person because happy people don't act like jerks. Feel better you are so wonderful and so talented.
Kaela See
2020-10-01 21:12:41 +0000 UTCCan you do a video on how you and Connor met? You two are so cute together and I always love to hear how we meet stories.
Kaela See
2020-10-01 20:56:28 +0000 UTCHello everyone, I´m new here! Anywhooo.... taking that commenter issue on what´s happening collectively: I think we´re all done with the "work till you drop dead" paradigm. No other generation like X and Z have been presented with performing and working under such miserable economical circumstance PLUS driving ourselves insane with a level of perfectionism that inevitably will drive us to burn out. We´re done with having our healthy boundaries trampled over by people who suffered under the old system and want us to force ourselves through the same trauma. So we "toughen up". We had to be tough on levels that any 45+ year old cannot possibly understand. Good for you for blocking her. Especially if your empathetic and sensitive, you have to protect yourself. Your work is tremendously good, but I get that sometimes we´re blind to it when we´re going through a process. Take good care of yourself, you´re not scamming anyone, we´re all here because we wanna be.
Natalie Newman
2020-10-01 12:10:18 +0000 UTCTotally echo everything Connor and your friends said about the commenter. It's such a bummer that people can feel hurt and upset enough about their own life to then try to put that on someone else. At the end you mentioned going in circles because of the "demons" you are trying to exercise. It reminded me of advice I was given from a mentor of mine that whenever you are trying to remove a demon, it's important to have something to replace it with. Other wise it will come back and it will bring friends. What you said was a good reminder to me as I'm working to untangle some very illogical world views and damaging beliefs. Anywho, I think you are doing an awesome job as a business owner and a human being!! ✨
BrennaBeloved
2020-09-30 17:04:55 +0000 UTCAs a regular patron of yours...I have NEVER felt “scammed” you are a human being. You cannot be expected to crank things out like a machine. The thing I admire most about you is your ability and willingness to be vulnerable and transparent with your audience. I’m very sorry you had to go through this...it’s incredibly unfair and unwarranted. You are worthy and loved and admired when you create great art and when you need time for your own health. Your worth is not based on your productivity or the choices you make for your own business. Keep being rad, love.
Julie Birge
2020-09-30 05:26:13 +0000 UTCHi Cheyenne, first of all this woman clearly has some other stuff going on in her life. It’s not her place to tell you any of that. You’re doing a great job and your videos have helped me in so many ways, this year especially, whether it was something for my brain to turn off to or feel like a comforting friend. (Also if I prematurely send this comment one more time, I’m going to lose my marbles). Thank you for all that you do. Stay safe bb and take care of yourself
Madeline Flack
2020-09-29 22:57:50 +0000 UTChiya, cheyenne ! i feel like i could say exactly what you’ve said here. it’s hard knowing that people are bitter and just lashing out at you. it’s hard having to be a competent and empathetic human all the time. you deserve those zone out days! we all like you very, very, very much. we think you’re swell 🤎 keep working on you in the ways you see fit because, truly, that’s all that matters. you matter to us !! 🍁
trisha hartley
2020-09-29 22:17:45 +0000 UTCThis is my first time ever commenting on anything semi-public on the internet but I just really felt like it was necessary this time. I think it is awful that you had to experience that woman commenting like that and I am very glad that you and Connor are able to work through it in a constructive way. I feel like we are in a similar situation. I don't have a creative job but it is something that most people would see as light, fluffy and just a dream job. That doesn't mean that it can't be overwhelming or stressful. I find it especially toxic that we are told not to talk about those struggles openly, that admitting you are struggling is weak. I think it is incredibly strong of you to talk about it in a space that exposes you to so much hate and judgement. It has really helped me to feel less alone. Being young should not be confused with having no right to be exhausted. I hope that you feel better soon. The fuck you attitude is a good start for sure😉 but I think it is also great that you and Connor spoke about why people post things like this and it probably comes from a place of pain. No one ever has everything figured out. We're all just here trying 🙂 sending a very save hug from Germany (with a small hope that you actually move to Sweden for some fika content 🙃)
Lea Thomas
2020-09-29 20:02:07 +0000 UTCHad a thought while listening. You could view your current art process similar to a snake shedding their skin? Not a fun or pretty process, but man are you silky smooth and new when you get through it
Ivanna 001
2020-09-29 18:18:06 +0000 UTCWhat a BITCH. I work in the creative field too and I've heard this type of talk before and it always ALWAYS comes from jealously and ignorance. It's never ever about you when they talk like this. I'm glad you blocked them.
Ivanna 001
2020-09-29 17:50:42 +0000 UTCwowow oh boy who IS THAT LADY AND WHO IN THE HECK WRONGED HER? i feel sad that something in her life has messed her up so bad that she felt the need to leave such a hurtful comment to one of the most lovely people on the internet. personally, i feel so lucky to have found a place in your community both here on patreon and in toast and i think it's absolutely amazing that you share both your highs and lows of life and business. as someone who is just starting out on a similar path, your channel has been such a place of clarity and honesty around the trials and tribulations of being a creative online and professionally. i'm totally in the same boat about having a knack for stuff and the subsequent frustration + perfectionism thing. i was talking about this with my brother (who is thankfully an incredible role model for me) and he has a major learning difference and he went "i have to try THAT HARD to do everything in my life" which gave me a weird sense of perspective. he explained that when things are a challenge he sees it as a chance to grow in not only that specific thing he is facing, but also in his willpower to keep going and keep trying despite the opportunity for failure. anyway, thank you for always being so open and kind chey, i hope your body and mind (...which are so complicatingly connected) feel better soon! also connor is so freaking insightful, i loved his added commentary and his recommendation for "fuck you energy" :) can't wait to see what's coming in this period of awkward growth, art-wise, stream-wise, vlog-wise! this was very long, k bye. love, jo.
Jo Stockdale
2020-09-29 06:24:56 +0000 UTCThis is so horrible!! So sorry you had someone say this to you, I am glad you have the support of Connor and your friends though. But also, you're allowed to be sad and angry about it and don't have to be logical about it always. You bring so much sunshine to so many people and have helped me in so many ways be able to navigate my mental illness while also wanting to illustrate. You have made such a positive and proficient impact for me and for others. Easy to say don't listen to them, I know - but you're loved and brilliant. [[ALSO if we didn't wanna be patrons then we wouldn't be??? like can that lady just not]]
Brooke ?
2020-09-29 05:27:14 +0000 UTCWOW THAT LADY IS A DING DONG. I’m so mad. All of the other comments addressed lots of my feelings, but yikes. Imagine being her, writing such a comment on a pleasant, lovely YouTube video. In addition to wanting to express how weird and out of line that comment was, also wanted to say that I checked into one of your drawing streams and it was so lovely and I did a bit of drawing myself. It helped my mental health and also my creativity. So thank you! I hope to join again.
Alison Kirby
2020-09-29 01:55:11 +0000 UTCI was just reading through these comments, and remembered that (like Natalie) I started using Patreon so that I could support you. This is our choice. I’m just a bit younger than you, and can confirm that being a young person in today’s society is TOUGH - I think you’re doing great <3 <3
Maddy Young
2020-09-29 01:41:54 +0000 UTCRest is important. You gotta refill your own cup before you can share it with others. ❤ You are doing and making beautiful things in this world. That lady needs to focus on her own life-- her comment is super bitter, I definitely agree with you there. How rude of her to leave such an awful comment 😡 You are a wonderful human bean and deserve to do all the things that make you happy. We are all living in such a strange and crazy time... trying definitely counts for something. 💕
Wanda the Brave
2020-09-29 01:32:21 +0000 UTCSeething from the other side of the computer for you. I'm the proudest Patron (and frankly, you're the only reason I began using Patreon!). Also, Connor's monologue was gorgeous, true, and incredibly reassuring. Sending all my love your way, you wonderful human, you.
Natalie Vuong
2020-09-29 00:28:09 +0000 UTCYou and your work brings great value to my life 💛
Bee Poshek
2020-09-29 00:11:29 +0000 UTCAlso, me when you said you lost the game data of Hades: ＼(〇O〇)／
Fred Lanthier
2020-09-29 00:03:02 +0000 UTCGod I was so upset hearing what that one lady commented!! GIVING HER THE BIGGEST EYE ROLL EVER like what the heck! but omg, I'm so glad you got to share it with your friends and Connor, like UHHGGG she doesn't understand -- life is hard no matter what you do, she has no empathy for you or your feelings, and y'all are both right, self care isn't something they understand. but anyway! I digress. I believe in you and your future--I am excited for every step of it chey and that is why I put my money towards this patreon specifically <3 You are an amazing being and I am SO FREAKIN thankful to have found your channel and this page and the discord, because I know that I am not the only one going through shit but also making it day by day and working on myself and THAT is how I feel like we all connect and make it worth while. We have a cozy little tea time family here and I love it and I love all of toast and everything chey. I MEAN I'm getting a freakin drawing of yours tattooed on me forever like 🙆🏻♀️ <3 and please don't feel discouraged about playing games-- it's something that helps you and that is the best thing to do for yourself, continue! and I'm sorry to hear about the sourdough, I like to see that as one step closer to a new batch. Like every challenge we see is an opportunity for growth (much like the sourdough lol)
Sabina Hope Vasquez
2020-09-28 23:59:18 +0000 UTCSo sorry you had to go through this ಥ╭╮ಥ This is such a shitty comment you received!! I find this *unbelievable* that some people act like this and don't think it's a f*cking weird attitude to have towards anyone! I love being able to support you on Patreon and I love everything you share with us <3
Fred Lanthier
2020-09-28 23:56:43 +0000 UTCAlso the monster cookie Tillamook is my FAVORITE
CoffeeWith Cate
2020-09-28 23:52:35 +0000 UTCHOLY CRAP. I am so glad for you that Connor is there because his advice and comments also 100% I’m able to apply to my own situation of bullies with no empathy LOL but really wow. That person just sounds like she hates her life. You are a good person and a talented artist, even if you don’t feel it some days, and that’s why we’re your patrons. ❤️ I did want to comment about therapy and burnout — it’s my first month of therapy and my therapist put me on a mood tracker! I modified a mood calendar I found on Notion and it has been helpful for me to slow down and listen to my body and feelings. Sometimes with burnout we just go from one “goal” to another and constant negative automatic thoughts. 🤍 Last pps lol productivity and money as a function of capitalism is BULLSHIT. You have innate worth, in your joy, in your relationships, in your LIFE. And life is NOT work. Aghh. Anyway, thank you for sharing your vulnerability with us 🌸
Klarisse Gepilano
2020-09-28 23:44:07 +0000 UTCWhat a rude comment!!! There are struggles in working no matter where you work or what you do!!! You're NOT lazy, the real people who adore you know you're incredible. Your shop is up to you!!! People who support you here choose to because we see how hard you work and love the impact you're making. You don't force ANYONE to sub to your patreon we all CHOOSE it. We can spend our money however we want. People who are miserable lash out to make other people miserable. It takes a sad person to go out and try to make others sad. You're amazing and if you need your time to heal we all 100% support you. Don't let one extremely rude lady ruin the amazing thing you've built and community and shop and everything because that's one person's opinion. Also because of your sourdough vlogs I was inspired to get my own 😊 I used to bake bread for one of my past jobs and seeing how much you enjoy and love it inspired me to give it a go! Can't wait to see how my first loaves turn out 💛 thanks for everything you do and keep your head up beautiful!!! Can't wait to see what you're up to next! 💛😊
CoffeeWith Cate
2020-09-28 23:32:27 +0000 UTCYou are not weak. You are not lazy. You are an amazing artist and an amazing human being. People like that woman lash out because of their own sore spots and insecurity. And that's not okay. ... Hurumph. What a rotten lady. Also I'll give you all free and available money that I have FOR WHAT!? Because it's my choice to. Because you deserve it and I want to see you succeed and continue to grow. Sorry the sourdough flopped! But failing just means you are learning, which is never a bad thing!
TeslaDarwin
2020-09-28 23:25:29 +0000 UTC![개성인쥬스[pingkypen]](https://xaiju.com/istorage/106895.jpg)
