How are you all doing?
Added 2020-05-28 23:14:54 +0000 UTCI want to know what's on your mind, on your heart, on your spirit. Tell me a story, unload your pain, share your magic, whatever you want. This is a free for all. I'll read everything and try to respond to everyone. <3
Comments
It's been such a strange time. Immok and feel super lucky as my employer has been flexible to those who need it and I've been able to work from home. However, that means being with a toddler 24/7, which, adorable as he, can be a lot (as many millions of people know!). It feels like so much has happened over these months, at the same time as feeling like every day is the same. We always go for a walk, which is nice but it's all got quite samey. My partner's father died during all this, in the Czech Republic, so she went away for a fortnight to see him (she did get to see him twice in hospital before he died, despite much stricter regulations). He hadn't been ill (well he obviously was but no one knew) beforehand...in 5 weeks he went from being independent in his own house to dying. We were mad at his other daughters for visiting him and not socially distancing at the start of the lockdown (when he wasn't ill) but now we're so glad they did as if they hadn't he would have gone from bring isolated in his home due to covid19 to being isolated in hospital to dying alone. Anyway, this is massive for our family - my gf now has no living parents and our 1 year old will be we again see his Jeda. It's all so sad BUT it seems already ages ago. This is a weird time warp time. I don't know how to feel about it all, and I desperately want my son to be able to socialise (learn to socialise really as he's so little) with other kids. I've definitely realised that everyone has their own challenges through this though, I can't see many of any of us being untouched by it. Sending love to you and yours across the ocean. This is a stream of consciousness and I can't even see what I've written as I can't scroll up, so not sure it makes any sense at all! X
Amy Knowles
2020-07-22 10:09:25 +0000 UTCFirst of all, it means so much to me and probably all your other fans here to get your response. Thank you. I finally got to see my girlfriend and I feel so much better when we're together, I feel safer. My father is doing some progress, which is great. It's a slow process, but I'm hoping for the best. And the most important, my brother is doing really well, I hope this continues until all is over. It's crazy to see how everything changed in 1 month, I was really desperate back then, I feel better right now, even though along with the US, Brazil is the epicenter of covid. Hoping for the best for all of us. Thank you once again.
Luisa Pucci Bueno
2020-07-02 21:01:03 +0000 UTCI think that's the nicest thing anyone has said in 2020. I'm not crying you're crying! ❤️
Mike Davidson Jr.
2020-07-02 11:21:40 +0000 UTCOh God yes! WDTGG is on my list of weekly things to not miss LOL.. I love when Tegan and Sara call each other, Maam plus their constant sibling banter. In the meantime, Sophia, Stacey, Sonia and Emy are picking on both of them in the comments 😂😂
MLBCatcher12
2020-07-01 20:27:18 +0000 UTCI hear you on the guilt. If it makes you feel any better, I haven’t accomplished anything. No home projects here. Just a lot of half-read books and half-finished guitar demos, etc. it’s ok not to be productive. Capitalism is a lie and it’s fine to just *be*, I promise. In fact I think a lot of people should just learn to *be* for awhile. I think it would help to expedite a collective raising of human consciousness, which we need desperately right now if we’re going to defeat the evil forces in power anytime soon. That was all a roundabout way of saying, keep it up. You’re doing a good job. I’m sending a lot of love your way. ♥️
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 17:12:59 +0000 UTCNice selections! A couple of those I didn’t recognize so I’m going to check them out. I’m going to make a post on here soon of the music I’ve been listening to in quarantine. How’s the working from home going? Still doing that or have you returned to an office/other type of space? Thanks for sharing. I hope you’re staying well still enjoying music and food. Don’t lose that joy! Especially the food :) lots of love. Xo
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 17:07:59 +0000 UTCBrian! I hope you’re staying well out there. I didn’t know you worked in a hospital. Thank you for doing what you do. Have you and your loved ones stayed clear of the virus? I hope you get to see your family and friend soon—it’s a major sacrifice you’re making. I’m so grateful for good people in this world—people like you balance out the horror of the human existence. I want you to know how much your support all of these years has meant to me! You may not know it but I see your comments and your support and it always warms my heart because you’ve really been there from the beginning. Keep shinin’ that light. Tons of love, Brian. Xo
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 17:04:36 +0000 UTCAmen to therapists and reading. I actually just got a therapist myself. I remember you from Chicago, is that correct? Forgive me if I’m wrong. Have you gotten to paint again since you wrote this? I’m sorry it took me so long to reply. I hope you’re doing alright. Lots of love ❤️
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 17:00:26 +0000 UTCHave you gotten to see your girlfriend yet? I’m so sorry. How is your brother doing? I’m sorry it took me so long to get to this post. My god I’m so sorry to hear about your dad. Is he healed? It sounds like you’ve experienced some unimaginable pain and you’re likely still processing it all. Please know that you and your whole family are in my heart and that I’m putting love and light energy out into the world specifically for you—I hope that it finds you in a much better state of being than you were in when you wrote this. Thank you for being open and sharing all of this with me. So much love to you. ♥️
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 16:58:44 +0000 UTCMy girlfriend and I keep talking about how devastating it must be to be elderly right now, as most elderly people aren’t able to see family and friends. It makes my heart ache. The fact that this virus has taken out so many people in nursing homes is so distressing. Thank you for being there for them—we need loving people like you to bring them comfort and joy. I know it must be emotionally taxing for you though. Florida is taking a pretty big hit right now, huh? I hope you’re staying safe and clear of the virus. Please take care of yourself, my friend. Sending you so much love and an extra dose of HEALTH! ♥️
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 16:53:35 +0000 UTCDesuana! So great hearing from you. I still have and love the book you gave me for my birthday many years ago and it always makes me think of you when I see it on my shelf. As far as racism in America, my god. It’s exactly what you’ve said. How could you not be enraged constantly? I’m so ashamed of this country and its racist foundations and its white supremacist leaders. I have a lot of hope that the pendulum is swinging in the direction of justice, but there’s so much work to be done. Posting on twitter and Instagram is the least I can do—I’m listening to black voices (specifically black women) and doing what I can to amplify them, accepting criticism when I mess up, and trying to find all of my blind spots. The main thing I keep trying to explain to other white people is that actively being anti-racist is the only way forward. It’s not enough for a white person to say, “I’m not racist because I don’t do racist things and I don’t think racist thoughts!” Participating in systems that are inherently racist and beneficial to white people while being detrimental to black people *is* racism, and that was admittedly one of my blind spots. So, all of this to say, I’m trying, but I will be doing more and more to be an actively anti-racist voice in this hellstorm. Sending you tons of love, Desuana. ♥️
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 16:48:08 +0000 UTCThat’s all you can do! I’m doing the same. Trying to eat right, exercise, work and play equally, etc. Sadness is hard. I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling. We’re gonna get through this together. So much love <3
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 16:33:00 +0000 UTCI’m sorry it took me a month to get to this post. How are you doing now? Have you been able to see more people? My heart aches for all of the lonely people isolated in their homes right now. I have serious empathy for you. I see in your profile photo that you have a kitty—is this sweet little angel a helpful companion? I’m glad you were able to watch the Noonchorus set—I’m hoping the next livestream will be far less glitchy. Sending you a lot of warmth and many hugs. Take care of yourself, ok? ♥️
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 16:30:59 +0000 UTCGosh, I’m so sorry. Two small kids at home during all of this is something I can’t imagine—my girlfriend and I have her young son here at home and it’s been a big adjustment not having him in school. I have a lot of respect for you and so many people who are caring for more than one child and are working full time simultaneously. I’m glad the music has been somewhat helpful :) I hope things in Germany have eased up a bit since you wrote this? It seems like you all have mastered COVID-19. Meanwhile here in the U.S... 🙄 Lots of love <3
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 16:27:08 +0000 UTCI was just texting with Tegan about that tour yesterday. We feel like it’s imprinted on our memories forever because of what was happening in the country at the time. I hear you on feeling more emotional than usual. I cry pretty much every day now over the smallest things. As for WDTGG—yes! This is a great idea. Maybe I’ll even make it a Patreon exclusive thing. Let me give it some thought. Thanks for the suggestion! Much love <3
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 16:21:37 +0000 UTCI can relate to so much of what you’re experiencing and I’ve got to say, you’re doing great. I especially know how it feels to have depression and be isolated from your family because of it. I’m so glad to hear you’ve been feeling the thrill of possibility. It’s real and it can open a lot doors that lead to more thrill and more wonder and more possibilities. I want to encourage you to keep seeking truth and enlightenment for yourself. Your world will be come bigger and bigger. Thanks for sharing your heart- sending you so much love.
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 16:17:59 +0000 UTCI am really really looking forward to the Berlin concert release coming out. I will buy it the moment it is available!!
Tony Magliero
2020-07-01 16:02:49 +0000 UTCLet me say that writing about dreams is one of the BEST exercises there is. It's pretty much been 80 percent of my writing inspiration when it comes to short stories. I'd love to read what you've written when it's done. Congrats on your wedding, too! It's good to have something to look forward to. Feel you on the missing parents thing. It's a struggle. Sending love right back to you. Thanks for sharing <3
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 15:59:46 +0000 UTCHappy early birthday!
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 15:57:16 +0000 UTCLove Leos :) I'm Aquarius sun, Leo rising, Taurus moon.
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 15:56:50 +0000 UTCI'm so bummed about it too. Really hoping the rescheduled dates work out but I've got a feeling they'll be pushed again. Sending you lots of love. Hang in there.
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 15:56:13 +0000 UTCoops, "life" was supposed to be "wife" but also life!
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 15:54:54 +0000 UTCMan, I hear you on the home schooling. We've got a 9 year old (my girlfriend's son) here at home who hasn't been in school since March and, well, as you know firsthand it's almost impossible to get anything done. Also sad about the Bowery show. Fingers crossed it's still going to happen on November 2. I'm really glad to hear you're feeling the love for your life and kids--I think this quarantine time has definitely brought some families closer together (though probably lots realizing they don't like eachother also? ha) I'll be curious to see what new divorce vs marriage rates look like after all of this. Also don't worry at all. I've not done a single puzzle this entire time. <3 Be well!
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 15:54:25 +0000 UTCHow did the move go? How're you feeling? I'm sorry you had to leave your cat. I couldn't imagine. But I'm happy for you to have this fresh start--are you settling in?
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-07-01 15:50:11 +0000 UTChttps://paradoxeffects.com/es/products/terran THIS IS A COMPANY BASED IN TIJUANA, COOL THINGS OVERALL
German G
2020-07-01 02:33:02 +0000 UTCYES. Burn. It. All. Down. I'm in the same place. Reading, listening, learning. Learning more in a month than I have in 29 years, which is a sad thing to acknowledge, but it's also good. I see a collective progress being made in the right direction. Keep up the good fight, my friend.
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-06-30 19:02:19 +0000 UTCGosh. I'm sorry. The fact that anyone could fault you for being "not attentive" right now is mind-boggling and laughable. WHO is able to concentrate on anything right now? Certainly not me. I'm distracted every damn second of every day. Are you able to take walks outside by yourself? Take lots of deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth if so. It probably sounds like I'm stating the obvious but this has literally been the thing that I do every day to bring my nerves back down to planet earth. Lots of love, my friend.
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-06-30 19:01:04 +0000 UTCI know it well, my friend. So many of us are facing up to our own white guilt and cowardice, myself included. I've not done enough. I always thought that because I wasn't racist that I wasn't part of the problem. It's only recently that I realized that by participating in racist systems that I benefit from, I am contributing to white supremacy, and that I've got to be actively anti-racist every single day in order for any of this to change. Power to you for acknowledging your own privilege. That's where it starts--I have a lot of faith in you to challenge systemic white supremacy moving forward. Lots of love <3
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-06-30 18:57:41 +0000 UTCMaking things is good. Logic and learning is good! Chips and TV are even really good to an extent. I'm having a hard time making anything myself. I've made lots and lots of guitar demos but no words are coming yet. I think I'm still just too stunned at the state of things to know where to begin or what to say. That's pretty much where I'm at. Also eating lots of chips.
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-06-30 18:52:54 +0000 UTCI don't have anything so new right now but I will say I love my EchoDream2 Death By Audio pedal a LOT. But since I dumped my Fulltone Mosfet due to the company's owner being a complete dickhead, I've got a new space to fill on my board. Any suggestions?
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-06-30 18:50:21 +0000 UTCI GOT THE CHOCOLATE AND I LOVED IT! THANK YOU SO MUCH. Someday I really hope to make it to Mexico for a show. Love <3
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-06-30 18:48:20 +0000 UTCI'm so sorry to hear about your struggle with depression, as well as your spouse and child. I know that depression intimately. It can rob you of everything. I know that being immunocompromised is probably not helping in the anxiety department. It sounds like you've learned to be a rock for your family but that you don't have that same kind of "crash pad", so to speak, for your own hard days. Let me encourage you by letting you know that I know how difficult that is to do and how wonderful it is that you've decided to be that safe, stable anchor for your family. If you're up for it, the next time you're having one of these days, take a solo walk outside if you're able. Then come home and take a hot bath or shower, and maybe eat an avocado if you've got one and maybe a little dark chocolate. Tuck yourself into bed and listen to some ASMR if you like that sort of thing (I recommend Karuna Satori, BladeWhisperPro, and LloydASMR to name a few favorites). Massage your temples and tell yourself that tomorrow is a brand new day. Feel free to disregard EVERYTHING I just said if you're not up for it. It's not my intention at all to be trivializing. I just know these are a few of the things that get me through the hard moments. Sending you lots of love and light, friend.
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-06-30 18:47:05 +0000 UTCThe heartbreak is real. I have to remind myself that my stamina is key and that this fight will not be won without an endless supply of it. In the first few days of the protests I think I definitely let my rage get the best of me and didn't know how to channel it well (apart from attending protests and donating what money I could). So I know exactly what you mean about working to not center ourselves. It was like I let my own fury become the subject of the household, and as we know, that ain't right. Through trial and error (constant errors) I'm letting Black people (especially Black Women) lead the way. Seems like you know how to listen and your heart is exactly in the right place. So don't worry. Just keep it up. <3
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-06-30 18:38:01 +0000 UTCShe's right! I'm no Taylor Swift, though I've been trying to emulate her for years :) I hear you on the booze and weed. My girlfriend asked me to cut back on the ganja smoking (I've basically been waking and baking since I graduated college) and I'm now on a strict no-weed-before-5pm schedule. I'm showing no sign of slowing down on the booze though, soooo. Not to make any of this about me. It's just to say, I completely understand and can relate to what you're feeling. Lots of power and love to you. Seriously <3
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-06-30 18:29:41 +0000 UTCTo Bring You My Love is my favorite! I could imagine you doing a really great version of the title track.
Hal Phillips
2020-06-19 00:37:14 +0000 UTCI don't know what I would do if I was alone. I am really feeling for you right now. Blessed be our pets! Take care of yourself, friend. xx
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-06-18 22:55:58 +0000 UTCI love PJ Harvey so much. I only heard her music for the first time in 2015 when I was in England recording Sprinter. I've been listening to her a LOT in lockdown, especially Too Bring You My Love and Is This Desire?
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-06-18 22:53:13 +0000 UTCOCD is real torture. I've dealt with bouts of it myself, though nothing close to what it sounds like you've experienced. I know COVID-19 doesn't help your situation a bit. I'm really sorry about the tinnitus, too. I imagine it must be maddening. I'm glad to hear you found some solace in the music...always know that you are not suffering alone. I think talking to other people about it whenever you feel isolated can be helpful. Let people share a bit of the burden with you, even if it's just a facetime or text conversation with someone. Sending you lots and lots of love. xx
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-06-18 22:22:32 +0000 UTCIt has been an absolutely mind-blowing month. Year, yes, but this month especially. I am also hopeful that things are changing for real. I'm glad you're an optimist--we need people like you to keep the morale and energy alive. Lots of love xx
Mackenzie Ruth Scott
2020-06-18 22:16:59 +0000 UTCThe past 10 days have been mind blowing. I am a white man. I have many black friends and yet I am amazed at how much shit they put up with. They used to take me along with them in their car at night when they had to go into the City of Maimi ( for context: Miami-Dade County has 30 different little cities and two BIG one, City of Miami and City of Hialeah). Invariably, for no reason we'd be stopped and the City of Miami Police would shine a light in the car. As soon as they saw my pasty white complexion the nature of the stop would change. Canes, my friend, would get a warning instead of having his car turned inside out looking for drugs. I thought that shit was over at one point but look at where we are. I hope everyone is safe and well. Things need to change. I believe they will... then again I'm an optimist.. Take Care!
MLBCatcher12
2020-06-07 03:19:52 +0000 UTCMarijuana and bourbon seem to disappear more quickly these days. Not in a 10 step way, but in a way I’ve noticed. My wife and I are fortunate to have jobs that allow us to work from home but there’s new Buspar in the house. We’re doing our best and the house is getting smaller each week anyway. I miss hearing my daughter and her friends as they play together while I casually overhear their inventions and plans. We play more together now which is of course great too. We work on puzzles and she endlessly asks for stories about what my wife and I were like when we kids. I purposefully make sure she knows how confused I was by everything and how it seemed like I never fit because I think she feels two steps removed from things sometimes herself. I want to make sure she knows she’s not alone. We listen to a lot of music. She says you’re fine, but though she wouldn’t voice it to me because I’m a fan, I know she thinks you’re “no Taylor Swift”. We find common ground on bands though, and I can now sing most of the words from Reputation. Badly. We’ve been better but we’ve been much worse.
Stephen Merryman
2020-05-31 01:49:34 +0000 UTCim doing okay <3 have been creating art and music. taking an online logic course. eating chips and watching reality tv. working on a song called general tso's tofu. and of course, been so saddened by the news. this county needs to change. how are you?
Jamie Snyder
2020-05-29 22:58:40 +0000 UTCI'm being weighed down with white guilt and am confronting my own cowardice.
Kevin Connell
2020-05-29 19:48:51 +0000 UTCHmmm. Right now it just seems like the world is a total dumpster fire. I just got a mediocre review at work for “not being attentive enough”. Which is hard to do when you feel like we are living in a basket case world. I try to stay sane and fend off the panic attacks by listening to music, playing my guitar, and reading. I’m so much more fortunate than others, but I still have this depressed mood about where we are in this world now.
Christopher Rose
2020-05-29 15:00:38 +0000 UTCI was starting to feel very discouraged about the pandemic but this week has blown in and now I'm feeling powered up with rage at the police/white supremacist structure of the US. It kind of feels like this might be the opportunity to burn it all down and fix it for real, so I'm just reading and learning as much as I can from the organizers who are ready for this work.
Alyson
2020-05-29 14:26:56 +0000 UTCFeeling pretty out of it, to be honest. I was visiting my parents when the international chaos started, so I've been at my childhood house (on a different continent) for the longest consecutive time since I properly moved out a couple of years ago. It feels very strange to be back in this environment. I love them and I'm so grateful, but I'm also feeling oddly isolated because of it. They're more understanding of my depression than ever, but there's still so much that they don't properly know about me. Its been a good few months on medication, but being here for so long has definitely altered my illusion of progress. A lot of personal stuff that I thought I'd very much gotten over has started simmering to the surface again; the lyric "you'll find me right where I fell" feels especially potent right now. That said, I'm reminding myself that I am actually much much better than a few years ago. I've started sporadically painting (I suck, but it's fun). I've started reading (a tiny bit) for pleasure again- I don't think I've done that consistently since I was maybe 14. I have moments, despite it all, where I feel larger than life and I feel real possibility. In those moments, I think I understand what "lust for life" actually means. Sure, that fluctuates every couple of hours, but I'm so incredibly lucky that these are my main (irrelevant) problems at the moment. I'm also spending far more time thinking about God, whether or not I believe, and my relationship with religion, which I have avoided thinking about in recent years. Apart from work and trying to enjoy things again, I'm doing my best to not be desensitized by the news and to help where I can. This was a lot to dump off my chest! I do hope you and your loved ones are well, Mackenzie. I don't know where I'd be without your music. SO looking forward to Too Big for the Glory Hole. All my love!
Daniya
2020-05-29 13:22:36 +0000 UTCIm doing better than I could be doing. Feeling even more emotional than most Mays for me. Where Does The Good Grow? is helping my a lot. Would you ever consider doing something similar? 😃💖😍 PS I'm obsessed with you and my boyfriend and I got your autograph in 2016 at the Pabst theater in Milwaukee when you opened for T& S. That performance of yours literally changed my life. Also I listen to Three Futures every single day at least once
Lisbon Mohler
2020-05-29 12:31:27 +0000 UTCYour music eases my pain. Or exacerbates it, but in a really good therapy kind of way.
Lisbon Mohler
2020-05-29 12:27:21 +0000 UTCDear Mackenzie: I want to let you know that your music has played such an important role for me especially when this all started. I developed tinnitus in March right when this all began, and I felt like I was going to lose my mind because I was suddenly alone all the time, which is my dream, but couldn't sit quietly or listen to music without the constant sounds of static and ringing. I'm a singer/songwriter and aspiring mixing engineer so this was a nightmare for me. I would try to listen to music but get upset. After a few weeks I pushed through the emotional pain and focused on "A Few Blue Flowers" since Silver Tongue was the album I was into right before the tinnitus started. I couldn't hear all the details I wanted to, but it was a turning point. Two months later I have gradually accepted my tinnitus and gotten back into my music. Staying home is relatively OK, but there are challenges. I am a survivor of severe OCD and worry about it getting worse. I spent literal years learning how to go outside again and thought OCD was in my past. Now I struggle with handwashing and grocery stores and mail again. I kind of hope to stay in lockdown as long as possible because going out again will be a hard adjustment. I can't even imagine it right now. I'll have to cross that bridge when I come to it. But I still have a paycheck and I can work from home. My parents are retired and good at staying home. I just got some time off work and have been sleeping a lot which I desperately needed. Thank you for reaching out like this. I hope you're OK too. <3 Michaela
Invisible Arcs
2020-05-29 08:18:24 +0000 UTCThere are difficult, exhausting 10 weeks behind me: full-time work from home two small children, homeschooling, not going outside, no playgrounds and so on. I am writing from Germany and now there has been a lot of opening here. At least two days a week school and kindergarten...you only now realize how important this is - for parents and children. I am really exhausted and on many days I was also desperate because the days didn't seem to end. But since whining never really helped before, we are now looking into the future and are prepared for the next lockdown ;-). Thanks for your music - helped so much. Music in general: I have never in my life heard so much music and bought so many records as in the last months, and surprisingly very little Netflix. Everybody finds something different which brings him down. Music was Mummy's little helper...so important for me!
Tini
2020-05-29 07:05:39 +0000 UTCI’ve been having major ups and downs. I was already a work from home person, but not being able to leave my little apartment for the small human interactions has made me feel more lonely. I am trying to keep myself busy with making art as my freelance work but the loneliness still gets to me. Appreciate you reaching out to us. I absolutely enjoyed the live set you did on Noonchorus.
April Guadiana
2020-05-29 06:08:16 +0000 UTCBeen trying my best to practice self care and not get too overwhelmed and sad but it's hard at times, hope you're doing okay
Ian R
2020-05-29 04:25:34 +0000 UTCIt’s been rough. We’ve been so caught up with Covid-19 spreading that just for a moment we forgot how big of a problem racism was in America. This week I am tired and exhausted and scared and over it. Honestly. To quote James Baldwin “ To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a rage almost all the time.” I’ve seen you post things on twitter and I just wanted to take a moment to say thank you. I appreciate you using your platform to spread awareness. Wishing you love and light, Desuana
Desuana Dubose
2020-05-29 04:11:46 +0000 UTCHello. Well since 3/15 ( the ides of March) all I can say is, life got a lot weirder. I didn’t mind the time alone at first but it had me pretty bad ( depression) a couple weeks ago. Overall, I and my family have been lucky. Been trying to help out anyone I can. Live payday to payday like most, but I’ve had a payday. I’ve got no room to complain except this whole Covid event has put me in a different, not as positive place. Still, I’m lucky! I work in Healthcare with the elderly. Most have been in home isolation which means the People I see in P.T. are the tougher more injured cases. I’m not Front Line but still every day after work, I come home, change, shower and isolate myself from everyone. I call my bedroom, “The Cave”. I only come out when it’s time to feed or leave the house( Sounds kinda Vampirish, LOL)! I saw you in 2016, when you opened for Tegan and Sara! A place with a BIG mosh pit called, “Revolution Live” in Fort Lauderdale. It was a great evening of Music and Great People. One of my most memorable days. Since then I’ve been hooked on your music 🎶 Tomorrow is the first day I see some less involved patients. Miami is just starting to open up a little. I have to say that I’m a bit nervous because my caseload will triple in one day, LOL. It’s not the numbers. It’s the pain you see and feel in the eyes of the elderly. Mostly I see pain and a lot of regret for things not done. It’s like they are wishing they had more time or had a Do-Over in Life. I know it’s Morbid but these poor older people confide in me, Everyday. That’s why I had to take so many Psych courses I suppose. I do my best to tell jokes and keep the mood light. I’ve got the Best co-workers in the World. They really know how to put on a brave, happy facade. Since I’m the one responsible for Evaluating everyone before anything begins, I see that sad side of the person before I unleash them into the general area with my Team of Do-Gooders. They amaze me! I’ve been coping by listening to music, doing my best to meditate daily, taking walks and also by singing 🎤. I only sing enough to torture my good natured neighbors in my Condo Complex from “The Cave”! LOL! I met a Swedish Singer who voice coaches me from time to time and performs in an ABBA tribute tour. Whenever she’s in town or just online, I shoot her a really raw recording and she tells me where my tongue needs to be or how to manipulate my throat to get those higher notes. I’ll never be good but it’s a hobby and keeps the spirits up! I’m glad you made it back home Okay to NY from the UK! I hope you get to go back and finish what you started! Thanks for all the attention you’ve given to us and helping to keep us sane with your posts and music ( I know, your apartment ain’t a club, but music is soothing and heals my spirit so I can’t Thank You enough). I know you feel kinda weird playing to a camera, but believe me, your essence and honest music comes through and hits its mark! Thanks 🙏🏽 Lots of Love to you, your Love, and All my Fellow Fans in this room! Peace! 🙏🏽❤️ Tony
MLBCatcher12
2020-05-29 02:56:09 +0000 UTCDude, I just REALLY hope my brother doesn’t get it and we pass thru this one safely. It’s a priority and unfortunately totally out of my control.
Luisa Pucci Bueno
2020-05-29 01:59:52 +0000 UTCFor me, it’s a mess. I can’t see my girlfriend, the people I love the most are at high risk ( I have a special brother, he had meningitis and “paralisia cerebral” however you say that in English when he was born, So he doesn’t walk, or talk or even breathe on his own anymore, extra: i got a tattoo with your lyrics in his honor. “Heavy are you on my mind”. I usually say my brother is my angel, through all the pain, he’s a fighter and always win his battles with a beautiful smile on his sweet face), my parents are old, and a bonus : when quarantine was starting in Brazil, my dad was robbed and shot 4 times. We spent days at the hospital. Now he’s finally at home but with a lot of pain and in risk of not walking ever again ( one of the bullets hit his backbone and affected nerves). So yeah I’m pretty much fucked up, angry and ranting something that probably no one will even read. Nice to get it out of my chest though. Oh and a plus: our president is also a dickhead and has no idea how to deal with a nation, his only focus is being racist, homophobic and hate women. I didn’t even have time to cry yet and try to process everything I just shared.
Luisa Pucci Bueno
2020-05-29 01:54:21 +0000 UTCi'm mostly reading, working on a weekly zine, and making shirts to supplement my income while i'm not working. i don't have access to my studio right now and i'm unable to paint, which feels like a very specific longing. i find the most comfort in reading right now. i'm grateful to have access to my therapist, they are really holding a lot for me.
Ariel baldwin
2020-05-29 01:04:58 +0000 UTCI've been doing ok because I've always kinda been a loner anyway, so I don't mind not going out. I use the time I save from my commute to do more running and walking, which is nice. I feel guilty sometimes that other people seem to be working on all these home projects, and I haven't done shit. I don't really want to be extra productive, I just want to *be*. I'm living for all the extra live-streaming artists are doing, including yourself, which is nice. It doesn't compare to the real concert experience, but it's all we've got right now so I'll take it. I loved the home-production value of your show - I hope you can do another one soon!
Mike Davidson Jr.
2020-05-29 00:59:04 +0000 UTCIt has been up and down a lot. I was fortunate to get a new job back in December that was much better than my old job. This new job also qualifies as essential and in mid-March we transitioned to work from home. I have done a decent job of self-isolating, not leaving the apartment much, and if I do, I wear a mask. My housemate however works at Walmart. fortunately he works the night shift when they are closed so he does not directly interact with customers, but there is still the concern that he might get it and bring it back. I am still working on figuring out a good transition from working to not working as it is starting to get a bit draining logging off from work and staying on the laptop. One of the nice things about working from home though is that I have access to all of my music library, not just the digital files. Vinyl, tape, CD, variations thereof... lots of options and still exploring more. The most recent thing I purchased and received was the vinyl boxset of the soundtrack to Nier Automata and Nier Replicant/Gestalt. Beautiful music that is somber at times. Story of the games are a bit much given the times though. Things I have ordered/pre-ordered recently include: Tank and the Banga's - Green Balloon Tank and the Banga's - Live Vibes 1 & 2 Sylvan Esso - With PJ Harvey - Dry (rerelease) (Also, thank you for retweeting the Consequences of Sound tweet, as that is how I learned about it) Lots of stuff on Bandcamp too. Trying to figure out what albums I will buy next week Friday there. Getting rambly, but will just say the past week or so have been tougher. I have good moments and then times where absolutely nothing sounds appealing. Will just keep on going though and enjoying music and food. Thanks for doing this.
judson
2020-05-29 00:47:14 +0000 UTCOverall I'm in good spirits. I work in the pharmacy department in a city hospital in Queens, one of the hardest hit boroughs, and it's been a hectic last few months. We started off critically understaffed due to many employees contracting the virus and being out sick which didn't help. Fortunately we received reinforcements from the U.S. Army Reserve Medical Corps and the U.S. Navy, which helped optimize our workflow and patient care delivery. I'm very thankful for their service, which required them to leave their families and deploy into a dangerous situation, in order to save many New Yorkers lives. I think most of the time, we did have enough PPE to protect ourselves from infection. Things here have been calming down a bit, enough so that the army pulled out last week. I no longer see the parking lot full of refrigerated trucks which were used to store the numerous bodies that the morgue couldn't hold. There's less hospitalizations as well. Also there's some promising drugs that have been shown help patients recover faster and reduce hospitalization time (Not hydroxychloroquine). I still regularly interact with Covid positive patients coming through from the emergency room so there is always a sense of unease in the back of my mind at work. I haven't seen my family or friends in a while since I don't want to risk potentially spreading anything. Setting up video chat session with my family has definitely eased some of that isolation. I've started a patio vegetable garden and it's been a fun and relaxing hobby. I currently have cherry tomatoes, tomatoes, basil, rosemary, zucchini, green beans, yellow squash, sugar pea pods, and snap peas growing. Nothing is ready to harvest yet, but I'm hopeful. Things will get better. Stay safe and be smart out there!
Brian Wong
2020-05-29 00:34:14 +0000 UTCTrying to find a place somewhere between feeling the weight of everything and taking space when I need it. In summation: trying to support my black friends in any way I can because clearly our country does not (and never has) protected them, mourning those we have lost to the pandemic, working to impress at my new label job from home, living with less funds after my other jobs got squashed by COVID, planning a wedding with fiance, wondering if the collapse of the touring industry will force both of us into new careers, watching her deconstruct what faith means to her during all of this madness (let me tell you, it just keeps getting cooler), writing my first short story about a terrifying dream I had over a year ago (send tips, please), becoming more and more sure my cat is going to wake up one day and start speaking English to my face, missing my parents more than ever, feeling grateful for our small apartment, seeking new music in place of new places, reading “The Secret Lives of Color”, watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer for the first (!!) time and re-watching Haunting Of Hill House for the third (!) time, and wishing I could give people a goddamn hug! I miss hugs. Ugh. Sending love to everyone on this thread. We’ll get through this together.
Natalie Peterson
2020-05-29 00:29:58 +0000 UTCI started a new job in early April - completely remote interview process, onboarding, and training (it helps to work in the tech industry!). The CFO, who I’m essentially replacing, left last Friday and I’m on week 2 on my own. It would be an exhausting process without this pandemic, and I’m really feeling like I can’t properly self-care. I’d love nothing more than to sink into a trance state for an hour, find the answers of the universe, further my tarot and astrology studies, and garden. But, the real world calls and I have to be here for it. I’d love to know your sun/moon/rising signs :) I’m a Leo/Virgo/Gemini!
Lavender Brooke
2020-05-29 00:25:06 +0000 UTCYou were supposed to have played here last week (Union Stage, Washington, DC) and I was soooo looking forward to that. So that and some other shows I have lost have me bummed out. I have so many friends in town here only I principally only see at shows and I miss them.too.
Tony Magliero
2020-05-29 00:24:41 +0000 UTCDoing okay here! Bummed that I should be standing in the back of the Bowery Ballroom right now waiting for you to go on 😩. I keep thinking back to that kepx living room show you did at the beginning of the start of this and what you said about making things and having something to show for yourself and that if it’s important to do it. It really stuck with me so I’ve tried to be mindful of that and have been attempting new things whether it be new recipes while cooking , working on my writing, building things. Just keeping busy. But not doing fucking puzzles, I am so sick of seeing people’s completed puzzles on my IG!! Lol. I am just really focused on coming out of this a better person. Healthier in my mind and body. It hasn’t been easy “home schooling” 2 six year olds but school is almost over and that will be a huge relief. I know I am grateful to have a home and a yard, enough money for food and bills. I struggle with feeling privileged because I had concerts, comedy shows and vacations cancelled and those are my biggest “problems” during this. I am not sure that the music venue I work for will ever open again but I know things could be worse. If anything this has made me realize how much I love my wife and kids and how much I actually do like being around them. Not saying that there aren’t moments where I want to strangle them but for the most part we are all getting along. Hope you are doing well and hope to see you back on stage by the end of this year!
Brianne Hirsch
2020-05-29 00:07:32 +0000 UTCAn addendum: I am EXTREMELY FUCKING SAD that i will have to leave my cats, but especially my sweet silly baby (note: she is 11) cat. I cannot express how much I love that cat, and I will thankfully not be too far away, but not seeing her every day is going to be frustrating.
Veronica Chepigan
2020-05-29 00:06:57 +0000 UTCI know the feeling of having to keep a happy face on for those around me, regardless of whether or not I'm actually happy, and I know how emotionally taxing it is. I see you and I feel you - keep on fighting the good fight, friend ❤
Veronica Chepigan
2020-05-29 00:01:28 +0000 UTCI'm moving in 4 days. It's a super welcome change, since I'll finally be out of my parents' house, but it's also brought a really strange assortment of emotions. Like, this is my childhood home... I've been going through the >2 decades' worth of my things strewn about my bedroom and I'm reliving the memories they bear, like time capsules I've buried out in the open... but while this packing has proven to be a fucking drag, I'm really excited. I know this move is going to be a catalyst for a good deal of progress for me, and I am very stoked to be in an environment that'll best support my growth as a person. (But will I be able to afford rent? Tune in next time to find out.)
Veronica Chepigan
2020-05-28 23:58:11 +0000 UTCWhats new on your pedal board these days?
German G
2020-05-28 23:57:58 +0000 UTCI am writing from Tijuana, BC, Mexico, putting aside the state of the world, thankful for my family and work. I am a fan since I saw the cover of Sprinter. Saw you perform in San Diego at the Casbah. I saw Erin your MOOOG player before the concert and since I did not see that there was going to be an opportunity to talk to you I gave her some healthy/organic chocolate bar for her to share with you! Did it arrive? LOL
German G
2020-05-28 23:57:33 +0000 UTCI'd say I'm fighting a losing war with major depression but that would imply I feel that way today, and today I am doing well. I'm healthy but I am also in the population of immunocompromised people and have to take extra care. I might be even healthier than usual as I am not exposed to a crowded office environment where there are always a few sick people trying to push through the day. My spouse and teen both have issues with depression too. The isolation wears on them harder than on me most days. I often feel I have to be the one feeling well so that I can keep them from spiraling down. This makes it harder on me to avoid my own downward spiral. (See what I did there?) But today, I am finished with work so I am going to go listen to some loud music, play a bit on the PS4, and cuddle on the couch with my best friend (she's also my spouse). Today has been magic in that small, sublime way that life can be. Thank you so much for asking; it made me stop and let myself think about all of this.
Sam Patterson
2020-05-28 23:45:48 +0000 UTCHonestly? I'm broken-hearted right now. My family is lucky that we've been pretty okay during the COVID-19 lockdown stuff, but my heart is breaking for black Americans right now. Although I do various things in my life to try and combat racism and white supremacy, it feels really hopeless right now. I generallly don't share my feelings about this publicly much because the last thing POC need is to see a bunch of uber-privileged cishet white males centering ourselves - but I'm torn up about it. And even writing this makes me sound like a virtue-signalling douchebag. Anyway, music helps give voice to that stuff in a way that is often helpful, which is why I appreciate people like you so much. Sorry for dumping. I just can't imagine what it's like to be black in this country right now.
Russell Kolts
2020-05-28 23:40:08 +0000 UTCHonestly this week has been a struggle. I've been feeling totally devoid of enthusiasm. And it's weird not touching another human for months, I feel like a Martian. Grateful to share a home with two dogs though!
Daniel M.
2020-05-28 23:36:50 +0000 UTCThe first thing that popped into my head was that I thought it was cool earlier when you retweeted something about PJ Harvey because I'd always wondered if she was an influence on you and I'd gone back and forth on whether or not I thought she was. Other than that: I'm tired, I'm sick of coronavirus, I'm so eager to go to any type of crowded event I previously would've avoided, and I'm listening to Veruca Salt.
Hal Phillips
2020-05-28 23:18:43 +0000 UTC
