~The Hobbit: Thorin Oakenshield X Listener SFW: Not Alone~{Patreon Exclusive}

You don't have to suffer alone.

Contains: Comfort, Anxiety Aide, Encouragement

Part of the theme/subject matter of this audio comes from my own experiences in how I've come to understand how I process things, and trying to remind myself that I'm not required to work things out on my own, and that the people that care about me will want to help any way that they can. I hope this audio helps and/or reminds people that you're not alone.

~Audio Transcript Below~

Thorin: I thought I'd find you here........

*pause*

Please don't try to run.........

*long pause*

*hushes*

*softly*

When I told you that I would always be there for you......I was not saying it in jest........

I meant it with every fiber of my being.....

*pause*

The ones who care about you cannot be there if you do not let them.....

*sighs*

I know that the idea of being perceived as anything more than.....functional and content.....is a terrifying prospect for you.....

You prefer to work through whatever is bothering you internally......perhaps because you don't want to waste someone else's time talking it out......don't want to waste your own time......

I understand that feeling intimately......

*pause*

It would not be a waste of time to me......even if you can't articulate in the moment what is causing you stress or strife.......

*long pause*

I know what it feels like to try to handle everything on your own.....to have what feels like the entire world rested on my shoulders......but keep it inside because of my need for others to....perceive that I'm strong.....

Because I am the one many of them look to......*huffs a laugh* I am a King after all........

If I'm not alright.....or I show weakness......how can they depend upon me? I'm supposed to be the one who's alright......

All of this sound familiar?

*pause*

I thought so.......

*pause*

Letting others know that you're having a hard time is not a show of weakness......

Your worth is not determined by your strength.....or by how content in your life you are perceived to be. You are allowed the full gambit of emotions that the race of men experience.......you are not lesser if you express them......

And you are not better because you don't.......

I know it's terrifying....to allow those who you care about see cracks in your armor......

You've been taken advantage of in the past.......and treated poorly for being anything more than content.......

*pause*

It's alright, you don't have to talk about that......

I can see it.....is all......

It's because I know......

And you're terrified that it's going to happen again......that a person you care for is going to abandon you because it turns out that you're not as strong as they thought you were......

*pause*

If someone cares about you for nothing more than your strength that they can use for themselves......that is not someone worth your time......

You are worth more than your strength.......

*long pause*

I could not have reclaimed my homeland on my own......I would not have overcome dragon sickness on my own.......

If I had not placed my trust and my.....love......in those who offered their own selves......I would have died long before I reached Erebor.........

And even if I had......I would have been consumed by the same sickness that took my grandfather......

The ones who cared about my wellbeing....physically and mentally.......made it possible......and saved me from myself........

You included.........

Think about it.......if you were in the same position as I....in this moment......would you call me weak or pathetic or unlovable....or whatever else is going on in your head simply because I'm expressing or even feeling anything more than contentedness?

*pause*

You wouldn't......

So why are you not offered the same courtesy?

And before you say, "Because I'm supposed to be the strong one," ask yourself this:

Who appointed you that position? Who said that you had to be the strong one? 

*pause*

What seems a mound of dirt to some.....is an entire mountain to another......

Trying to shoulder everything on your own isn't feasible.....in the long run......

The gods made us to be social creatures.......to live and to love and to share triumphs, struggles, defeats.......

Together.....with those who love you and care for you.....who truly do......you can.......navigate.....and perhaps even overcome the strife within you......

No one will grant you an award for suffering in silence.......

*pause*

*deep sigh*

I know.....it is hard to know who to trust.....who will not use you.......

But I can say with as much honesty and truth in my heart that I care for you too much to throw you by the wayside because you're sad......the very idea......*grunts angrily*

*sighs*

I am here for you........in whatever capacity that you need......

I am not expecting you to be miraculously cured of your trauma just from one conversation with me......however I hope that I put the idea in your mind that you are not alone.....you are not a burden......and you can come to me with anything......and I will do my best to treat your concerns with love.....with compassion......and as seriously as I can......because you putting your trust in me to share what's causing you strife......requires those things.......

*pause*

If you just want me to sit here and be a comforting presence.....I can do that.......you don't have to say anything more......

*long pause*

*softly*

You do not have to thank me.......I didn't find you and say all these things to be thanked........

But I understand where you are coming from.........

*pause*

You know......you are better off an open book and alive.....than a castle wall and crumbled.........

Anyone who truly cares about you can see that........

*long pause*