Witches Going Live 1.2

Sidequest completed, back to Coye next.

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Chapter 2 - The Imperalis Adventurer’s Guild

Leo descended the stairs two steps at a time, leaving his room on the fourth floor for the inn's dining room in a hurry. Most days, he would've already been on his way to the Guild, but his indulgence led to him sleeping in and falling behind schedule. Not feeling like wasting any more time, Leo aimed to make this breakfast quick.

When he got to the dining room, he was met with trouble.

"Come on, carrots. Don't be such a bitch. Breakfast is on me! A pretty little thing like you? I'm sure we could find a way to settle things after you've had your fill..."

A blond-haired, emerald-eyed young man a little younger than Leo was leaning over the table of a female adventurer with white hair and bunny ears was sitting. A beastfolk, assuming the ears weren't fake. Leo didn't recognize the girl but felt sympathetic that she was getting treated to a helping of the local hospitality first thing in the morning. At least the girl's partner showed up soon after the pickup line. Much to her delight, a male adventurer walked up to the blond from behind, grabbed him by the hair, and bounced his head off the table's hard edge in one smooth motion.

Considering the man had a fuck-off giant sword strapped to his back, Leo thought the kid should damn well be grateful he got off with only a concussion.

He took one last look at the kid before sighing and getting on with his business, working his way toward a window stocked where fresh baked goods shipped in from a local bakery were calling his name. "One," Leo muttered under his breath.

"What's that, hun? Gonna need ya to speak up if I'm expected to hear ya!" The woman at the counter spoke loudly over the din and clatter of cooks hard at work back in the kitchen. She was all smiles, frizzy-haired and middle-aged, but in a motherly sort of way.

"Sorry about that, just thinking to myself. Nasty habit, y'know?"

"Oh, so you're one of them fancy big-brain types I've heard so much about, are ya?" The friendly woman started laughing in an overly boisterous manner for such an early hour. "Don't let all that thinking get ya into trouble, kid!"

"Might already be too late for that," Leo gave her his best charming smile. "But I'll see what I can do. In the meantime, how about you get me one of those blueberry muffins with the huge-ass sugar crystals and a nice fat breakfast bagel loaded with extra bacon?"

"Youuu got it, sweetheart," she said, drawing it out as she scribbled his order on her notepad. "Cash or tab?"

"Room 425's tab, if you don't mind."

The kitchen lady bobbed her head in affirmation and added more unintelligible scribbles to her notes. Then, she saw that his requested pastries were pulled from their cooling racks and passed over the counter to the appreciative young man. Leo gave her a nod and went on his way, holding his muffin in one hand while chowing down on his bagel in the other.

He was already done by the time he stepped out the front door, emerging from his home base onto a busy side street of the biggest city in the entire realm of Karnalle. This cobblestone road was one of the older ones in the district, and while it showed its age, the wear and tear was maintained well enough by the novice geomancers on the city's payroll.

Leo's job saw him jogging around all over town, and he'd been down nearly every street in Imperalis as a result. As far as Lazing Lane went, he liked its character. It was a laid-back section of the adventuring district serving as home to many popular inns and eateries. The architecture around him was a mishmash. Like most of the city, it was a melting pot of influence from other realms.

Across the street from his own Inn Between was an honest-to-goodness halfling-operated bed-and-breakfast by the name of Furthest Farthing, and beside the artificial hill it was dug stood a mushroom as large as a building. Of course, the reason it was so big was that the mushroom was a building- a popular gnomish delicatessen serving the realm of Vippa Blonrap's quirky cuisine. The variety of how well it all meshed together and felt like a cohesive unit gave Lazing Lane a certain charm that more recent sections of Imperalis didn't have and some of the older sections would never have again.

Leo stepped out into the quickly moving flow of foot traffic, flooded even in the early morning as people went to and fro on their business. His destination was the same as it always was this time of day- the Imperalis Adventurer's Guild. While petitioners could access Guild terminals across the various city districts staffed by receptionists who would take down the details of their quests and send them to the main office, the adventurers had to drag their asses to said main office to be matched with those same quests.

He'd traveled this route hundreds of times over the last two years since the beginning of his adventuring career when he'd first checked into a first-floor room of the Inn Between. Unlike the newbies Leo noticed sticking out like a sore thumb, he wasn't interested in any of the bells and whistles strewn around the place. Given that the Association of Adventurers essentially owned this entire district, they commissioned an unending stream of public works as a monument to their most famous heroes of past and present alike. On every street corner was a statue of some famed adventurer, murals depicting exhilarating battles were plastered where everyone could see, and plaques adorned with notable quotes or endorsements were displayed in front of nearly every building.

While the average tourist might find it interesting that Hrrahgrag Blood Eater was overly fond of Sweet Meats and Other Treats and recommends you eat there, none of it had the same appeal to Leo as it did when he first entered this brave new world of overcommercialization.

Occasionally he would stop and inspect the marketing displays put on by Wraithmail Armories and the Adamant Tortoise- two rival smoothies that were something of a local entertainment. The two businesses were locked in an ever-escalating advertising war to secure the sweet, sweet customer retention that came with converting a newly-minted bronze-ranked adventurer into a lifelong fanatic of their brand. It didn't even matter to them if the adventurer was so green behind the ears that they didn't even have a solid combat style or preferred weapons and armor types- fresh meat was fresh meat.

Leo slowed down as the throng of traffic stalled in front of the two impressive sales displayed on opposite street sides. The place was teeming with eager adventurers and even more eager sales representatives.

"Looking for a fresh new kit, are you? Well, you've come to the right place, lass! Garharhar!" A stocky dwarven man working at Wraithmail bellowed mightily to a young, blonde-haired girl wearing cheap leather armor, who until then had just been window shopping. All it took was a moment of eye contact from her emerald eyes for the man to focus entirely on her, launching into a whole tirade that wouldn't likely end until she'd spent some gold.

"Two..." Leo remarked.

"You say something, boy?" A three-foot-tall gnomish man with goggles, a massive tool belt, and a smile that could sell you a vacation home in another realm jumped onto the table to Leo's right. "Because if armor is what you're after, remember, trust the tortoise!"

Shit. Leo thought he was careful not to attract the attention of any thirsty sales reps, but he guessed you could never be careful enough.

"Quite right, sir. Quite right. I always make it a point to trust tortoises whenever it's appropriate. Why wouldn't you? Incredibly trustworthy creatures, tortoises. Don't even think they're capable of lying, though not being able to talk might have something to do with that." Leo started talking fast, conjuring up another roguish grin that didn't reach his eyes.

Trying to distract a gnome through friendly conversation was like trying to kill a fish by drowning it, but Leo was adept at maneuvering out of awkward situations. As he talked, he continually stepped back into the crowd until rejoining the stream entirely. From the gnome's perspective, Leo was gone like dust in the wind after only a blink.

Leo sighed as he drifted away. He didn't have any patience for aggressive sales pitches today. Besides, even if he had a mild interest in their wares, it's not like he'd ever really be counted among their clientele.

All that was just as well. Leo was almost at his destination.

The funny thing about the Imperalis Adventurer's Guild was that despite being nestled in the center of a district filled with tourist traps, ostentatious monuments, and dozens of stores selling AoA-branded merchandise, it still somehow managed to stand out as the single most brazen display of the Association's obscene wealth.

While the Guild wasn't all that tall, only standing three stories above ground level, it covered a vast area and would've given off an overly broad appearance if it weren't for the specific way it was constructed. It managed to maintain an imposing visage by sitting at the apex of a man-made hill- a three-terraced ziggurat. Each of the three terraces was treated with metal detailing corresponding to the three most common adventuring ranks- bronze, silver, and gold. The Association prided its Imperalis location as the primary home of gold-ranked adventurers, displaying that pride in a symbolic climb. To reach its doors, any visitor had to climb past the bronze and silver terraces to stand atop the gold. A central series of white granite stairs designed for a massive influx of traffic split into an entrance and exit side by an ornate handrail added pleasing symmetry and a dash of elegance to the overall design.

Each of the three terraces covered a considerable amount of ground, containing lush gardens, benches, picnic tables, luxurious fountains with imported koi from the realm of Ikkuni, and further indulgences. It was a lovely place where adventurers enjoyed each other's company, idling their time and enjoying the facilities before setting out on yet another long journey.

Atop the gold terrace to either side of the entrance were small gardens dedicated to surprisingly humble shrines of the twin goddesses of Karnalle. On the side of descending traffic was a shrine to the goddess below, Tenebris Primis. It was hidden from immediate view by a massive weeping willow, sheltering the visage of the goddess's statue and a subdued garden of shade-loving plants from the harsh sun of her younger sister. Said sister's shrine was over on the left with the incoming traffic, and one could barely see the tips of Lux Ultima's wings peering over a barrier of hedges. The surrounding shrubbery granted a modicum of privacy to anyone who gathered before the goddess above amidst a grove of radiant sunflowers housed within.

Leo marched past these shrines alongside dozens of other adventurers marching into the Guild for their business in the early morning. As he did, he turned towards the shrine of the goddess above and offered it a gesture of respect. Even if his life wasn't perfect, Leo wasn't so far gone that he couldn't see he had a lot to be thankful for. That was worth a subtle nod and a silent thank you in his book.

Besides, he would've caught sight of the third statue dominating the main entrance to the Guild if he didn't look off to the side.

Standing atop a two-tiered dais- the lower tier decorated to represent the platinum rank and the upper tier to represent the almost nonexistent orichalcum rank- was a colossal statue of the current king of Karnalle himself- Theostus Lundreame. The way he was carved made him look like the protagonist of one of the shitty novels a friend of his kept always lent Leo, what with his broad chest of rippling muscles, heroic beard, flowing cape, and the massive sword he held above his head in a symbol of otherworldly power.

Whereas the statues of the goddesses were tasteful and artistic, giving a relaxing atmosphere for patrons to pay their respects, this depiction of the king was as overbearing as it was haughty. The fact that he was standing atop the orichalcum segment of the dais placed him above the very Guild's structure itself in a tier of his own, implying that his power was comparable to a demigod rather than a mere mortal like everyone below him.

The worst part of the statue wasn't even the king, honestly. It was the borderline misogynistic rendition of hordes of women clamoring to be by his side. Ten beautiful women of various races were included in the statue. Some of them were famous lovers of the king who were well known by the public, while others were allegedly women the king wished to be included in the statue if you believed the stories.

Notably, none of the women depicted was the queen.

The statue made Leo uncomfortable, and its presence was a significant reason he never enjoyed the terraces half as much as he would've liked. Basking in the shade of that specific shadow wasn't Leo's idea of a good time- beautiful gardens and scenic fountains be damned.

Once he passed through the great statue's heroically spread legs, Leo entered the massive Guildhall. Whereas outside, the traffic flow had at least been orderly, inside, the vast open floor of the lobby caused the oversaturation of adventurers to spread out and become chaotic.

Everywhere Leo looked, there were famed heroes whose deeds were sung across the lands by bards of dubious skill. From a cursory glance, Leo noticed the Golden Knight- Gildaine Glorigold himself- prattling off a heroic pep talk to his party of silver squires. Just behind Gildaine was a trio of ominous occultists known as the Weird Sisters casually sipping tea and gossiping. Arrowsplitter Bernadh, the Fools in Motley, Bazzleby Dartricious, the Sisterhoodhood of Scarecrows... the list went on and on. These larger-than-life individuals were practically infesting the place, heading off to different destinations and mixing with the frantic clerks scurrying every which way pushing endless trolleys loaded with paperwork, quest items, rewards, proof of kill trophies, and so much more.

The lobby was home to hundreds of quest boards, some suspended magically in the air, others arranged into countless displays in the middle of the floor. If you couldn't be bothered to sort through everything yourself, it was recommended you check in with one of the dozens of counters staffed by helpful receptionists who were only slightly less thirsty to meet their quota than the smiths of the dueling armories. It was a tough job meeting the demands of the public as well as the expectations of upper management, but it paid well as long as you met those quotas and had good mental resilience. A lack of shame didn't hurt, either.

Leo pushed himself toward a row of desks built into the backmost wall, a section split between service counters on the left and registration desks for new adventurers on the right. This unfortunate location meant that these counters saw low traffic throughout the day. Most veteran adventurers had no reason to come back so far when one of the endless desks closer to the entrance could fix them up all the same. Instead of being packed shoulder to shoulder like fish in a net, Leo had a few arm's-lengths of personal space to himself there. It was enough breathing room to trade some casual greetings with some of the staff and a few adventurers on the way to his desk of choice.

"Sup, Leo..." a tired, orange-haired catfolk boy yawned at him after momentarily blocking his path with an oncoming trolley.

"Garth, hey. Hang in there, am I right?"

"Another hard day of work ahead of you, Leaping Lion?" A grizzled, gruff, yet friendly spearman in black-plated mail asked.

"Long as my paws don't give out on me," Leo shrugged, then mentally cursed himself. He'd been trying to ease off on that joke.

"Safe travels, Leo."

"Weather's good for running. Stay safe out there."

"Hey, Leo."

Leo met every exchange with a platitude of his own, but he never liked this part of the job. None of these people were his friends. They were acquaintances giving the kind of greeting people gave to someone whose name and face sparked recognition- but not recollection. Leo had trouble admitting why exactly that bothered him, but it did.

He sighed, thankful to be done with the worst of it now that he was approaching his favored desk. Then, the man behind the desk gave Leo a new reason to sigh.

"No, really! It's a great bar. You got good drinks, chicken wings like you wouldn't believe, and this warm, friendly ambiance to the place that you just won't find anywhere else. If you still don't believe me, how about I take you there and treat you to a few drinks?" The man proposed, running a hand through his shaggy brown hair. Then, he leaned in closer to the pretty half-demon rogue he was chatting up.

Despite the odds, she was the least suspicious-looking of the two.

He whispered something to the girl that Leo couldn't catch over the noise of the bustling hall before making eye contact with Leo and returning to an upright position. "But hey, there's no rush. I'll be here, same as ever. You know where to find me, yeah? In the meantime, the king of fetch quests is here, and I need to help polish his crown."

Somehow, that got the cute girl to laugh pretty hard. She grabbed the slip of paper the man slid subtly across the desk to her, sauntering off with a teasing waggle of her fingers, serving as both a casual greeting to the king himself and a flirty farewell to the bold receptionist. Now that it was just the two of them, Leo leaned over the desk and shook his head.

"How?"

"Afraid you have to be more specific, bro."

"How can you say stupid shit like that and still snag a date?"

"Leo, Leo, Leo. Haven't I told you? Chicks love it when you break out the sarcastic gay innuendos. The gayer, the better."

"Cut the bullshit, Dev."

"Alright," Deverall Grell laughed and threw out a cheaper and more sincere smile than Leo's. "I guess I'm gonna have to break this to you nice and slow so you really get it this time around, but when you have this little thing I like to call confidence, well... sky's the limit."

"That so?" Leo raised his brow in mock surprise. "You know, if you were half as passionate about your job as you were about chasing pussy then you wouldn't need to make sure my crown stayed polished."

"What, and miss out on our daily scheduled bronding time?"

"I thought I told you not to call it that?"

"Sure, but bro-bonding is so much clunkier..." Dev inhaled through his teeth and shook his head. "C'mon on, your Majesty. Let me have this one."

Leo's tension eased after a short moment of silence. After, he gave his friend the first genuine smile of the day. "Fine. But if my crown isn't shining by the time you're done with it, it's your ass on the line."

Dev responded with a smarmy laugh, always happy to see Leo break out of his shell. "Hey, hey! Keeping the Leaping Lion ship sailing is in my best interest, too, y'know? The only reason I can live a carefree life of flirting with the occasional young woman who finds themselves at the desk of a skilled, thoughtful, and charming man such as myself is all because of you. Every damn day you're out there doing the work no one wants to do better than anyone else who's ever done it, my man!"

"Well, when you put it like that... I feel so much better knowing all that thankless work goes straight into funding my dearest friend's debased, consequence-free lifestyle."

"Well, if you don't think I'm grateful enough, I could start swapping out 'oh, gods, that feels good' for 'oh, Leo, that'-"

"Shut the fuck up, Dev..." Leo laughed even harder, unable to keep a straight face around that bastard no matter how hard he tried.

"Besides, are you really gonna try and tell me I'm the only one who knows how to have a good time? Why don't you tell me why you're so late today? Huh? Did someone have some fun last night, or was it just me? Wait, you didn't finally score with that cutie of yours you're always talking about, did you? You know the one, uh... what's her name..." as he feigned ignorance in the hopes of getting a confession out of Leo, Dev adjusted his square-rimmed glasses and pushed them further up the bridge of his sharp nose, oozing smugness as he did.

"I don't want to hear a word about my late start from you, of all people, you shaggy-assed vagrant. You look like you fell straight out of bed and landed at your desk." Leo dodged Dev's probing question with a playful insult.

In the two years they'd known and worked with each other, Dev always had a look to him look that Leo could only describe as calculated sloppiness. His hair was just tussled enough to not look unprofessional, his white button-up dress shirt and black suspenders were just loose enough not to suffocate him, and his permanent stubble was trimmed just enough to imply he put in some minimal effort. It was a style Leo couldn't imagine himself pulling off, and he was more than a little jealous over just how easy Dev made it look.

"Not to mention it's your fault I'm so late. Ever since you talked me into getting that smart-orb a year and a half ago, it just keeps taking more and more control over my life... I swear, it's like my brain's hardwired to compulsively check my messages every morning, and there's nothing I can do to stop it..." Leo deflected.

Dev nodded sagely but didn't drop his grin. "I feel you. Hell, I don't even blame you! No doubt your inbox is just bursting with notifications from hot single ladies in your area who are down to pound."

Leo couldn't deny Dev's assessment in good conscience, not when taking the three girls he was messaging that morning into account. He did the next best thing and changed the subject, giving Dev an eye roll and a gesture of his hand, telling his friend to speed the hell up. "Yeah, yeah. Are you gonna tell me what's on the slate for today, or what?"

"What's on the slate? Why, Leo, my good man... what isn't on the slate?" Dev pulled out a hulking stack of quest forms somehow held together by a clipboard and slid it across the counter for Leo to take and scan at his leisure. "You'll be going all over the city today, and there are a few tasks you gotta do on the outside, but the good news is you'll be ending up at Grimme's Grotto by the end of it. Your friend put in a request for you again- Liriene Cardaign, right? That's the one! Just make sure not to make your partner jealous when you stop by and visit that magical cutie of yours. You feel me?"

Leo closed his eyes. Of course, Dev hadn't forgotten Liri's name- she was the only girl Leo ever mentioned, and Dev teased him over that as often as possible. As for the partner Dev referred to, Leo didn't have such a person. He was referring to a particular acquaintance who was almost certainly standing right behind him at that very moment.

"Morning, Vana," Leo greeted his fellow adventurer without even turning around to confirm she was there. "Guessing today isn't the day where you finally stop sneaking up on me and start saying 'hi' like a normal person, is it?"

"Wasn't in the cards, no," a weary-voiced girl answered. "But the future isn't set in stone. I'll keep you updated."

Leo turned and took in the sight of Vana Mirralinde, a silver-ranked adventurer about three inches shorter than he was, whose dark skin was barely visible under the hood drawn over her face. Leo always had trouble reading the mood of this subdued seer. To be fair, it wasn't entirely her fault. Vana suffered constant splitting headaches brought about by her tendency to receive strenuous and unwarranted visions of the future, which rendered her listless and devoid of energy. Even on her best days, she wasn't very emotive, and her choice of attire didn't do her approachability any favors.

Vana wore a big, bulky purple robe with a hood big enough to conceal from the light her unruly shoulder-length blue hair and brilliant teal-colored eyes. The robe stopped just short of her thighs, where a small gap of skin was visible before being concealed by her fanciful, embroidered thigh highs that trailed into a pair of pointy-toed calf-high red boots. Her stockings and sleeve cuffs were patterned with stars, she had a silver chain around her neck and a silver eye-shaped brooch in the shape of an eye holding her cloak in place, and a belt carrying a large pouch hung off her side.

Fitting of the fortuneteller she was, Vana's dress and demeanor created a mysterious air about her that was intriguing and offputting simultaneously. Leo liked her well enough, but he wouldn't call her a friend. He didn't do well around people like her- people who knew more than they let on. It always made him paranoid about how much Vana knew about him, and he didn't always appreciate that she seemed to be just around the corner with suspicious timing.

She was friendly, though, and like DireFuture, Vana often offered Leo decent advice. If only she could learn to deliver it more straightforwardly. Her endless riddles were too vague to be of any use a lot of the time, and he'd usually only figure out what she meant after it was relevant.

Dev mistook the relationship between them and always enjoyed teasing Leo over Vana. Smiling at the pair, he offered, "You know, if you ever want a lowdown on the best inns over at Farissa's Delight, I could score you some free rooms. You better believe I got connections, bro!" He laughed at his joke while Vana made a sound that might've been either a laugh of her own or a sarcastic parody of one.

"No thanks, bro. It's not like that." Leo shot him down, turning away to hide his flustered face. He missed the moment when Dev shrugged his shoulders and smiled apologetically at Vana. After doing a quick thumb-through of the clipboard, Leo stuffed it in his personalized vastbag and decided to be polite by making light conversation. "Gonna be heading out soon, Vana. How about you? Any plans for the day?"

"Mn," the hooded mage paused, seemingly deep in thought. "Depends on which side the coin falls, same as ever. If my headaches prove stable, I might see if anyone needs a temporary seer in their party. Otherwise, I suppose I'll return to my inn and take the edge off?" Vana phrased that last bit almost like a question. Or was it an offer?

...No, wait. That wasn't the case. Leo's imagination was getting the best of him. He'd spent too long flirting with girls on the orbnet that he was interpreting Vana's expressionless voice to have suggestive connotations when none were implied.

"Yeah? Sound rough." Leo casually nodded his head out of sympathy. "I'd love to stick around and chat, but-"

"The Leaping Lion waits for no man," Vana nodded back at him blankly. Whenever she said his misaligned epithet, it always sounded a thousand times more sarcastic than anyone else. "Understandable. No worries. There's always time for pleasantries later. You'll see me again."

"Is that a fact?"

"Signs point to yes." Vana shrugged and left it at that.

Before Leo could see himself out, Dev snapped his fingers and throughout a sudden offer. "Oh, hey. Real quick, bro. You gonna be busy with your chick later, or do you want to head out for some drinks?"

Leo made a funny face at him. "Dev, you asked some girl out for drinks tonight when I got here."

"Yeah," Dev smirked. "But it's been over a week since we've hanged! Besides, ladies love it when you keep them waiting- isn't that right?"

Leo could've sworn Vana seemed unamused, but for the life of him couldn't understand why. "Wouldn't know."

"Well, hey! Guess there really is a first time for everything!" Dev laughed, then looked expectantly at Leo.

He paused briefly, considering his options before shaking his head. "Nah, not tonight. Soon, though- ask me again in a day or two. I got the distinct feeling I won't be in the mood for much else after I finish everything I've got on my plate for today. Think I'll just hang with Liri."

"No worries, I gotcha," Dev clicked his tongue and winked, teasing, "Now get out there and make yourself and ol' Dev some fat stacks of gold, your Majesty."

Just as Leo was in the midst of sighing and turning around, Vana unexpectedly grabbed his hand and stopped him. The sudden physical contact with a girl shocked him, but before he could process it, she dropped her latest slice of vague mysticism for him to dwell on.

"Six and six do not make twelve. Always check twice before you delve..." Vana's voice took on a more serious tone, and a shining white light could be made out from under her hood until it faded.

Leo was quiet for a moment afterward, giving her a chance to elaborate, but the shorter girl merely let go of his hand and stared. "Cool, yeah. Just drop that on me, I guess. Is there any chance I could get you to put that in a way that makes it easier for me to tell what you're trying to warn me about? I mean, I don't want to sound like I don't appreciate your little prophecy, especially given your headaches, but I feel like ninety percent of the time, I never understand what you're hinting at until it's way too late."

"Story of my life," Vana remarked quietly under her breath. "Just keep it in mind, okay? This one should be pretty easy.

"If you say so. Guess I'll figure it out myself," Leo shrugged, then recalled his friend's words from earlier that morning. "Or I won't. See you guys later."

Now in a somewhat decent mood after having spent some time with his friend and having enjoyed a pleasant encounter with a mysterious colleague, Leo departed with the intention of getting his workday started. That he couldn't stop thinking about how soft Vana's hand felt in his own was a secret he kept close to his embarrassed heart.