Luxy Chapter Rewrites Part 1

I have begun working on the intensive re-writes. Rather than the early chapter rewrites which are basically just me polishing and rephrasing things much better and making minor changes, these ones are much, much different. Because the changes are so huge, I won't be releasing them publicly till all the chapters are done because they'd contradict each other.

If anyone wants to compare, this chapter was 'The Golden Goddess', but now it's long enough that I'll be splitting it into two distinct chapters when made public. You can read the original while it's still public here. 

I am still working on new chapters though, so don't worry about the story not progressing while I work on these.

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Breakfast’s as lovely as it always is whenever Opalina’s in charge of the kitchen. The kind, motherly woman left me a deliciously seasoned omelet, buttered toast, crisp, spiced sausages, and a damn good cup of coffee. Unfortunately, none of the girls had the same courtesy as the Doctor, so I have to wash up all the remaining dishes scattered about the place.

However, it sounds like I might not be the only one who cleans up around here for much longer. Thank the Gods for that.

Finally, the Breeding Tribe has arrived in Dewhurst after weeks of waiting. I’m ecstatic, and not just because it means I’ll be able to offset the chores to someone else.

Getting some actual cleaning staff will be the gateway to lots of improvements. Once this disgusting place is free of dust, cobwebs, and spiders, we’ll be able to hire Gwin’s family to make renovations... at least, that was the plan before this whole cold war against the Duke of Dewhurst began.

I have to focus on the positive. There’s no time to waste dwelling on negativity. The important thing is that there’s very little chance the Breeding Tribe is in the Duke’s pocket. Beastfolk are sincere people, and even if they weren’t, they aren’t Dewhurstians, so I’d doubt they’d refuse me service just because some local thugs pressured them not to.

The strength of the Beastfolk is not to be trifled with. They could likely handle any sort of thugs that the Duke could throw at them.

After cleaning up the dishes, I head into my office and take a long, unsteady breath of dirty Guild air. There’s no use denying it, I’m beyond nervous, and the cause of it is sitting right there on my desk. The sparkling bottle of beautiful, golden ambrosia looms over me, beckoning me closer to its unearthly brilliance.

According to Nikita, when I make an offering to the Goddess, then I’ll have an audience with her. She didn’t give me any details about how it’d go down or whether the Goddess would come here, or if I would go somewhere else to meet her... so there’s really no way of knowing how this will go. I’d imagine it works differently from God to God, but I really should have asked the Grekkan more about what to expect.

Needless to say, I’m very skeptical of my mysterious benefactor’s intentions. I need to approach the oncoming situation like a psychological battle between myself and her. Thankfully, such battles are the only kinds I have any chance of winning.

I have three weapons I plan to use against her during our meeting, and each weapon is sharper than the last.

My first weapon is a very small shot glass that I brought from my collection. When I say it’s small, I mean it’s outright tiny. It’s only to be used for ridiculously powerful shots of the most potent spirits known across the Realms, which seems fitting enough for the godly offering.

My second weapon is powered by the first, though that’ll make sense later on. It’s a list of questions that I wrote after thinking long and hard. From my interactions with the Goddess thus far, I feel that she’s an insufferable brat and that she’ll be far from cooperative with me throughout our meeting. Even if less than half of the questions on the list end up getting answered, that’s still much more info than I’d have started the conversation with.

As for the third, well, I need to test it before I know if it works or not. But if all the context clues point to what I think they point to, then it’s my greatest bargaining chip against the Goddess if I manage to get on her wrong side.

After gathering my courage and pushing down the anxiety brought on by my oncoming first meeting with the divine, I approach my desk with a heavy heart.

I’ve never been very religious, but I’m far from a heathen.

I recognize that the twin Goddesses of Karnalle exist because it would be naive of me not to. They’ve both directly affected the ebb and flow of the realm’s history more times than I could count... but I’ve never had too much to be thankful for, so... I’m not sure how to make this offering.

I guess I’ll just go with my gut.

Reaching out to the heavy bottle of magical liquid, I pop the top off and smell a heavenly scent waft out from the opening, cleansing the Guild of its rank air. All at once, every sweet smell that’s ever existed pours into my nostrils simultaneously. Never before have I been overtaken by the desire to guzzle down an entire bottle of spirits all in one go. As somewhat of a self-admitted alcoholic, that’s saying a lot about the quality of this drink here. It takes all of my willpower to fight back and force myself not to drink it.

The ambrosia isn’t for me, no matter how badly I’d love a sip. Besides, if I drank it, I’m almost sure I’d end up in one of those situations where I’d spend the rest of my life knowing every other beverage I drink would taste like piss in comparison to my one taste of ambrosia. I’m not about to ruin my simple, mortal taste buds over a whim like that, but the pressing desire is definitely there.

Pouring it out into the tiny shot glass doesn’t make it any easier, but I manage to resist, and I take the cup in my hand. Glancing upwards into the unknown, I raise the glass and clear my throat. “I present to you, my patron deity, a small taste of the offerings I have to give. Let us have an audience and discuss what must be discussed.”

At first, there’s nothing- not a word from the heavens or otherwise.

Then, suddenly there’s incessant laughter ringing out from within my heart. ‘That was lame as hell! Seriously? I know you pride yourself on acting like one of those stuffy butler types but dude, c’mon. Chill a little and gimme a few. I’m doing my hair.’

Gods still have to do their hair? Maybe it’s a hobby. I raise my eyebrow and shake my head. “I do have other things to do today, you know. Please, finish up within five minutes.”

‘...Excuse me? I’m sorry, but my divine ears seem to have betrayed me. I could have SWORN you just ordered me around like some sort of common serving wench. Surely you didn’t just make a demand of me? A Goddess?’

“I did, and I’m waiting.”

‘...Wait just a moment longer, then.’ The Goddess takes on a fierce, defiant tone, like an uppity child.

Sure enough, five minutes pass by while I continue to hold the cup skyward. Just as my poor arm starts to get tired, the world around me phases out of existence in a warm, holy light. Rather than blinding me, it actually feels comforting. Almost as if the light is the collective physical manifestation of everything good and right. Like sugar, puppy dogs, and the laughter of children all rolled into one. I feel safe within it... calm, collected, and totally at peace.

When the light fades, I realize I’m no longer in my office. I don’t even think I’m in Karnalle anymore... or any of the mortal realms, for that matter.

I find myself on what looks like a spacious gazebo high in the sky. The structure is wondrous, floors made of the purest and most white material I’ve ever seen. The pillars and the roof look as if they’re made entirely of light, but if light were somehow solid. I’ve never seen anything like this before— particles of mystical illumination float about, bending and reflecting the world like a million tiny crystals. As far as I can see, fluffy clouds spread across the bright blue sky in all directions.

Further off on the horizon, there’s a city styled in the same magnificent styling and manner of the gazebo. Looking around, I see that this city stretches in a complete circle around my current position. This makes me think that this single gazebo in the sky is actually the centerpiece of the entire floating city, perhaps where the Goddess typically holds her meetings?

I may not be religious, but I know damn well where I am. This mystical realm of splendor and shininess can only be the Supernal Skies of Serenity, where the devout and pious of Lux Ultima’s worshippers are laid to their eternal rest. Or rather, they live in that big city in the sky for all eternity, I guess.

That verifies the identity of my mysterious benefactor. There’s no longer any shred of doubt. My magical pimp-slash-wingman has been the better half of Karnalle’s creator deities this entire time. Then...

If she really was Lux Ultima this entire time, why in the hell couldn’t she have just said so? If she were more honest and just told me she was the Goddess of the Last Light, I would have likely been much more receptive to her particular brand of aid. But no, she had to drag this mystery out and make it vastly more complicated than it had to be.

I suppose that’s the divine, for you... just another reason I’m not very fond of their ilk. Much too spontaneous for my tastes.

Before I can linger on these thoughts for even a second more, a brilliant column of regal light shines down onto the center of the gazebo upon which I stand. This shining ray somehow outdoes the one I arrived on, looking even more fantastic in its sparkling beauty.

Even just a slight glance at the beam compels me to bend my knee, cast aside all my numerous sins, and beg for forgiveness for every wrong I’ve ever committed. My knees buckle in the wake of this divine ray, and I fall to the marble floor while carefully clutching the bottle of precious ambrosia to my breast. It takes all my willpower not to suddenly spill the shot glass held aloft in my hand.

The circle ceiling of the roof begins lowering itself down as if triggered by the light, becoming a raised platform and carrying upon it a single shrouded figure. The white shroud, glimmering with beauty and almost incessant sparkles, is held aloft by two beautiful doves. They swirl about their heavenly mistress, flapping their wings and scattering splendid feathers about the place before the figure snaps her finger. At once, the two white birds let drop the flowing cloth and reveal to me a vision of pure magnificence, entirely unlike any other woman I’ve ever laid eyes on.

So this is what a Goddess looks like, huh?

• Chapter Split 

My first glance at the divine being known as Lux Ultima is bewitching, and I find it hard to take my eyes off of her undisputable majesty.

Upon her head is a glowing, golden halo with tiara-like protrusions at the top. She has long, flowing blonde hair that trickles off into wavy, impossible-looking thick curls like the flowing locks of a beautiful maiden you might find in a masterful painting. Her hair splits off into two distinct major strands, which looks to be a magical effect. I don’t think that the look could be replicated naturally, no matter how much hair product was used.

She wears a rather skimpy golden bikini that reminds me of Sam’s armor, if not just a little classier thanks to the fact that both the top and bottom parts give way to a white, gold-trimmed skirt that covers her up much more than my beloved Princess.

The Goddess adorns herself with beautiful golden bracelets and anklets, each one set with numerous shimmering blue crystals so brilliant that I’d wager selling even just one would allow you to buy an entire castle all to yourself. My greed rears its ugly head, which I’m sure she can sense, but she allows me to get away with it. I can’t help it. I would kill for her jewelry. Oh, the things I could do for the Guild with that kind of Gold...

Her body is tall, curvy, and busty. Physically, she doesn’t look too dissimilar from Sam, if I’m honest. They have very similar proportions and even facial proportions. The legends do say that the Goddesses created House Lundreame to always protect and lead the people of Karnalle, so perhaps I shouldn’t be too surprised that Lux Ultima might have used herself as a reference.

The only significant difference between Lux and her creations is that the Goddess doesn’t possess the famed green eyes of the Royal Family. Instead, her own eyes are a shining, pure blue without any pupils.

Every single part of the Goddess is shining in that same warm light that transported me here. Looking at her makes me feel at ease in her presence, but I catch a faint flicker of something... off. She reacts to the slight shimmering of her aura but disregards it without noticing that I caught it happen.

Our eyes meet, and I feel free of the imposing sensation that overtook me upon seeing her. Suddenly, I can loosen my posture and stand up once again.

At long last, the platform touches the floor. It dissipates into an uncountable number of shimmering particles that circle and dance about the sky with refined elegance.

We now stand face to face, and a single bead of sweat forms on my brow as we bask in the unnerving silence. Lux Ultima raises her chin as if to look down on me, and she raises her hand. “Why do you not bow before me, Mortal? Does your arrogance truly reach such levels that you can’t even show proper reverence to the creator of your everything?” Her voice is much deeper and silkier than it ever sounded when she was speaking in my head.

Her aura flickers again, and once more, her expression briefly changes to one of total panic. She mistakenly believes I couldn’t have noticed this. This leads me to presume that the Goddess is polite enough not to read my mind during our meeting, although that may be a significant assumption on the integrity of her character on my part...

Regardless, If she didn’t want me to notice such things, then she shouldn’t have given me amazing, magical eyes that can detect almost anything.

Sensing that she isn’t being honest with me, I test what I can get away with by making a power move. “If you’re not going to take this seriously, then I’ll walk straight over to the railings and dump this entire bottle into the clouds.”

“WHAT?! HOW DARE YOU, YOU FUCKING-” The sky goes blacker than oblivion as Lux Ultima raises her voice at me. Once tranquil and pleasant, the clouds now distort into a growing maelstrom of wrath and uncertain terror. Lightning rains down like a terrifying arrow onto the heavenly city, and I hear many a horrific scream off in the distance. It tears down buildings and creates terrible fires stretching out into the horizon, ruining the beautiful vista laid so serenely in the surroundings mere moments ago.

I watch, dumbfounded, as I realize that this Goddess just wholly destroyed most of her own heavenly Realm in the blink of an eye. If I wasn’t drunk on my own courage right about now, indeed, I would be facing a mighty existential dread upon realizing that she could likely do the same thing to Karnalle at any given moment with no warning whatsoever.

Summoning more of that bizarre courage, I walk over to the edge of the gazebo just as I promised, and I extend my arm over the railing. I barely even have to pretend to start pouring it before Lux Ultima races to my side with all the grace and elegance of a drug addict looking for her next fix. Being a native Dewhurstian, it’s a common sight to me... “WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT STOP DON’T NOOO-” She screams in vain.

“Stop pretending from now on and play along. If you do, you’ll get the entire bottle. That’s what you want, yes?” If she’s going to try working with me here, I want to be on the same playing field.

She looks at me warily and tries to scoff at me disingenuously. “Look, look. I’m sure you’re upset and all that, but I’m not pretending about anything! Look at me, I’m the fucking Goddess of the Last Light, for fuck’s sake!”

I pour the tiniest droplet of ambrosia out into the clouds, and she shrieks like a petulant little child. A bright aura explodes from the tall, busty goddess in a single instant, and she turns into a much smaller and younger-looking version of the same girl. Now, the Goddess is about as tall as Zutiria, if not a little bit taller- although that may just be her gratuitous, crown-like halo.

“You bastard, I can’t drink any of that shit if you don’t directly offer it to me!! Agh! Good fucking job, you worthless pencil-pusher, that’s the cloud’s ambrosia now!!”

“That’s the idea,” I sigh, thinking to myself just how much pain this little interview is going to cause my poor brain. “You should have listened to my warning. For what it’s worth, I’m sure the cloud is very appreciative.”

“Oh, you’re just asking for me to smite you, aren’t you?” The Goddess of Light crosses her arms, her face contorting into a decidedly unholy-looking scowl.

“Go ahead, might as well save the Demon Lord some trouble, right?” I bow before her and mockingly spread my arms wide. “Or rather, you can’t afford to let me die... can you?”

“Erk-” Luxy cringes, stepping back and freezing in place while a comically large bead of sweat appears on her brow.

It’s here that I decide to test my third and final weapon. I reckon that I have a lot more power over her than she wants to admit, on account of the whole magical destiny thing. She can threaten me and get grumpy over my actions, but as far as punishing me? That would be entirely counterintuitive for her agenda. Knowing this simple fact allows me to be far cockier than I might otherwise risk.

Her silence speaks volumes, and I allow myself a slight smirk knowing that I was right on the money with my educated guess.

“T-that’s irrelevant!” She stomps her foot on the ground, deigning to break the silence by further shoving her foot in her mouth. “Do you WANT me to visit my divine armory and look for something to make your life harder?”

“By all means. Personally, I’d much rather we just have a polite sit-down where I carve as much information out of you as possible. When we’re done, you can go about your godly way and do whatever holy things you do as per the usual. Does that sound alright to you... Lux? Can I call you that?”

“...You don’t gotta be so formal. You can call me Luxy, Mortal.” She sighs, putting her hands on her hips. “Since I assume you aren’t going to be paying me the proper respects anyway.”

“Very true. I was never very religious in the first place- you have to understand.” I give her a polite smirk.

Luxy has herself a laugh at that. “You know, in a way... you amuse me. You really aren’t intimidated by being face to face with a God, are you?”

“Not when that God is you, no. Why would I fear my mysterious benefactor? Thus far, you’ve worked primarily to get me laid, and you made my dick bigger. While I do have a lot of questions we’ll no doubt discuss during this audience, surely the great Lux Ultima in her infinite wisdom can do no wrong, and she wants what is best for all her children.” I do my best to subdue my sarcasm, but plenty of it drips all over the place.

This amuses the shining Goddess. Luxy snorts in a way similar to Sam, again drawing even more parallels in my mind between the two. “And here I thought you said you weren’t very religious.”

“You know that I read a lot. I’ve skimmed the holy texts a few times in my life.”

“Between furiously masturbating to erotica,” She adds, not untruthfully.

“...So are you just going to passive-aggressively use my secrets, bad habits, and hobbies to humiliate me whenever I get too smart with you?”

“Pretty much,” The cheeky Goddess smiles. “You got a hell of a lot for me to choose from.”

“Yes, about that. Am I to just take it that you sit around watching my life unfold and that you just constantly read my thoughts? Before anything else, I’d like to know your level of... ‘involvement’ in my life.”

“You think I don’t have better things to do than watch over an alcoholic chronic masturbator all day every day?” The Goddess scoffs, putting her hand on her hips and raising her nose, trying to look down on me despite our clear height difference.

“Ex-chronic masturbator. I’ve transitioned into a full-blown sex addict, thank you very much. Although I have you to thank for that, I suppose.” The ethics of how my partners are selected from on high will come up very soon, but I’m still in the process of the initial back and forth— an essential stage of any business encounter.

“Right, you’re welcome. We both know you needed the help.” Luxy laughs, showing off that she can be a little cute, I suppose... “For your information, I only check in on you every now and then. I’ll give you that one for free, but any other questions past that, and you’re going to have to provide me with some of that succulent ambrosia.”

“I suppose that can be arranged,” I step forward away from the railing, determined to kick things off. “Let’s get this strange meeting started then, shall we?”

“Don’t tell me what to do, mortal!” Luxy stomps her foot at me before initiating an awkward silence. “...But yes, let’s get started.” She sighs, acquiescing to my demands.