a guide to flaming out: say "no" more
Added 2025-11-20 19:52:31 +0000 UTCfootage from Say "No" More!
I have realized that "Guide to Flaming Out" abbreviates to GTFO
Comments
sometimes a healthy boundary *does* let someone down
Ian Danskin
2025-12-07 14:53:16 +0000 UTCSorry I'm a bit late to this, but I'm struggling somewhat reconciling this with GTFO: State of the Universe and figuring out when "No" shifts from "setting healthy boundaries" to "letting someone down and losing trust". How to balance wanting to help more (and being able to), without wanting to be open to be taken advantage of - especially if that isn't happening yet.
Adam S
2025-12-06 22:20:04 +0000 UTCI feel like this is group therapy. Thank-you
Gordon Chamberlain
2025-11-24 04:07:17 +0000 UTCCongratulations!!!
Ace
2025-11-23 03:54:13 +0000 UTCI needed this today... I need to say no today
Elizabeth Chacon
2025-11-22 16:26:48 +0000 UTCSometimes I still feel guilty for quitting my shitty call center job without something new lined up, even though it would have killed me, and I'm doing a lot better now (even lined up a new job!)
Tom S. Tea
2025-11-22 13:37:23 +0000 UTCi cant explain how important GTFO is becoming to me
Daniel Osswald Claro
2025-11-22 11:21:43 +0000 UTCI'm not sure if I consider this a spoiler but it still makes me want to play the game. Thanks, Ian!
Florian
2025-11-22 11:21:29 +0000 UTCI joined Nebula on your referral a while back and enjoyed it, but only got to "Lady Eboshi is Wrong" last week. I think it's a good dual to this, where "Saying No can be kindness and loving in its own way" maps a bit with "we can understand and appreciate Lady Eboshi's motivations, skills, and achievements, and still take the side against hers." I also got mad at YouTube and Ghibli, because it's an amazing video.
Pablo Meier
2025-11-21 23:14:12 +0000 UTCThis video feels a laser-guided orbital strike aimed precisely at me, specifically. I have enormous problems with saying "no" and this hits very much close to home.
Zoe Storm
2025-11-21 17:43:07 +0000 UTCGTFO? NO! I mean, YES! Damn, this is confusing.
PC Escobar
2025-11-21 17:39:28 +0000 UTCok it sounds like you should definitely not bump your Patreon pledge
Ian Danskin
2025-11-21 11:19:00 +0000 UTCFuck you, Ian. Fuck you so hard. I don't make much, but I make enough. I live a paupers life because when people ask... I say yes. I solve the immediate problem. I don't think about it. I make barely $60k a year. I live in a rundown, spider-infested, converted attic. I have shitty clothing that doesn't fit.. and this year, 'yes' came to $24,580. So far. I know it's a goddamn problem. I know... I'll never see that money. This has been weighing on me for MONTHS or I wouldn't know that fucking number. I know 'no' is a valid, real answer. And yet, here I am. That number has only gone up since I realized the problem. I'm gonna have to confront this. It can't continue. I know that. Doesn't mean it won't hurt. Sometimes the only way out of pain is through. I didn't want this, not now. Not ever, really. And here you go, making me question myself - not for the first time with your damned videos. How dare you make me force myself to be a better person. Twice. Asshole. I'll have to bump my patreon amount if it works. Damnit.
SilentDis
2025-11-21 06:13:52 +0000 UTC"It frames boundaries as... Kind." You've unlocked something in me, Ian. You found something I didn't know was there and you gave it permission to be. I'm so glad that you decided to keep creating, because the things you make are one of a kind.
The Wizard Sexy
2025-11-21 02:40:35 +0000 UTCI cannot wait to share this with all my friends who are not smart or rich enough to join your Patreon
Brian Moon
2025-11-20 22:26:43 +0000 UTCWAS IT THO
Ian Danskin
2025-11-20 21:15:13 +0000 UTCIt was okay to do that.
Zylla's Athenaeum
2025-11-20 20:47:39 +0000 UTC
