INTEMPERANCE VI - Chapter 9, A Dish Served Cold
Added 2022-04-18 03:24:12 +0000 UTCThis is a little bit longer of a chapter because there was a lot of story to tell in this one. If you're one of those readers who does not enjoy the story of Hopple the accountant and what becomes of him, you might consider just skipping everything after the first scene, as this is where the Hopple situation is pretty much resolved. As always, let me know how I'm doing. Info only, my union is going on strike tomorrow and we'll be locked out for five days after that, so I will hopefully be able to put out another chapter with all that downtime. No promises though.
Comments
I get it. Nobody wants to math when they don't need to. Maybe an easy way to see what I'm going on about when you get to it is to come up with the totals for all four accounts. That should help to point out which is the smallest.
Ken Chambers
2022-06-13 22:19:11 +0000 UTCToo much for my brain to process right now. But I will review the section and fix it if need be when I do the edit prior to Amazon publication. Assuming you are correct (I'm sure you probably are), thanks for pointing it out.
Al Steiner
2022-06-13 22:13:03 +0000 UTCThe total isn't the issue. What I'm talking about is that Hopple intended to give the Brazilian cops the smallest account he had. But if it held 11 million and the other three totaled 20 million, it couldn't be the smallest. The other three would have to total over 33 million for 11 mullion to be the smallest of the four.
Ken Chambers
2022-06-13 22:08:47 +0000 UTCKeep in mind that Hopple stole from multiple people, not just Matt, and that he has already spent a good portion of the total that he stole.
Al Steiner
2022-06-13 20:54:57 +0000 UTCLoved the chapter. I did notice a bit of a problem. Hopple first told them about the smallest account which held about 11 million. There were three more accounts totaling about 20 million. That math doesn't add up.
Ken Chambers
2022-06-13 15:40:57 +0000 UTCYou know, I kind of like this idea that more I think it through. Let me see if I can put in some version of it during the recording process.
Al Steiner
2022-04-19 03:04:38 +0000 UTCI hadn't really considered the effect of Bill's response, but completely agree that it works well. As to my little fantasy, well... there's still a chance Bill might backslide a little when it comes to the actual recording session!
Robert James
2022-04-18 23:30:09 +0000 UTCYeah, that would have been kind of funny and I could have pulled that off. I did, however, want the Nerdlys to be immediately impressed by what they heard. And Sharon's comment about their sound check and volume projection seemed to be in character for her.
Al Steiner
2022-04-18 23:23:47 +0000 UTCYet another excellent chapter. I confess that I saw the potential for some low comedy that, alas, did not emerge. Specifically, I pictured Nerdley being his normal intractable self and making several cutting statements to the students about their perceived musical shortcomings (statements the students did not truly understand, due to Bill's verbosity), only to have his (or Jake's) mother literally drag him from the room by his ear and administer a spectacular maternal attitude adjustment! True, it wouldn't have advanced the plot in any way... but it could have been entertaining!
Robert James
2022-04-18 22:29:36 +0000 UTC
