MAY BONUS EPISODE
Added 2022-05-29 01:41:49 +0000 UTCHere is the bonus episode for the month of May :) We did a variety of stories that are from themes I've been considering lately. Tell me which ones you'd actually like to see make it into a full episode.
Comments
The pick me girl story sounds like OP was projecting…
Talia
2024-09-23 16:31:31 +0000 UTCgoing back and listening to old episodes and it’s so interesting to see these comments upset with justin over the ‘pick me’ thing because from a sociological perspective i do tend to agree with him. what functionally is the difference between a ‘pick me’ and a job applicant? obviously a lot of people baulk at that because they think well there’s clearly a difference, but they maybe struggle to clarify what that difference is? in both cases the behaviour is validation seeking. women seeking male validation is seen as embarrassing while individuals seeking the approval of hirers is respectable. is this because capitalism asks this of all of us? but does patriarchal society not ask women to gain male approval? is it about what we gain from said approval? getting a hirer to like you equals money, but getting a man to like you will just get you…. a man. not really the most incredible prize. so is the difference in that it’s a silly thing for women to want? because a lot of heterosexual women do want a man, but it’s just not cool to be obvious about it. is that what it is? i personally do find it embarrassing when i see women doing things for male approval, but i also recognise that this is easy for me to say as a lesbian who really has no men in her life whatsoever that i would ever care to impress. while i do think that morgan’s distinction of “it’s whether or not they’re putting down another person” is important in terms of clarifying whether somebody is an asshole or not, i don’t think it is always a good indicator for ‘pick me’ behaviour. i’ve seen people be called pick mes for criticising people’s questionable behaviour (things that could be seen as misogynistic or racist), and often the rationale is “you’re being a hater, you’re putting them down to make yourself look better, you’re virtue signalling that you’d never do that, you’re a pick me.” on the flip side, the woman in your story who was loudly saying in front of all the guys that she loves being eaten out could do so without putting anyone else down (like, without implications that all the other women don’t like this, and therefore she’s better) and she may still be seen as a pick me simply for saying sexual things in front of the guys. similarly, morgan likes to go to strip clubs and was called a pick me for that because she happened to talk about it where men might hear and approve. it’s so bonkers how much of this ‘pick me’ stuff seems to hinge on the question of whether or not a man/men will approve of something, and whether or not a woman is doing something for that approval or not. does morgan like going to strip clubs by herself? does she like going with other women only? or is an activity that she only enjoys with her boyfriend? does seeking the approval of your boyfriend count as seeking male validation? does it matter? does anyone care? oh my goddddd. you see what i mean lmfaooo. anyway i’ve typed way too much, sorry, but i really do find this equal parts interesting and frustrating, and i totally get justin’s confusion. i think he’s right to question it and honestly everyone should be questioning these socially constructed terms a lot more before using them against people left and right as if they’re written into law. edit to add: i love that immediately after i finished typing this out and hit play again it was just justin eating a gnat. and then immediately after that morgan specifically pointed out that the whole pick me girl thing is misogynistic. thank you lol
beth semane
2024-09-19 02:08:10 +0000 UTCAs a foster kid at different points in my life and until I became an adult, packing your stuff into garbage bags because they didn't provide suit cases or anything. Losing all your stuff sometimes in a move. Being picked up from school bt a social worker with whatever they collected to call yours in a black trash bag.... so yeah when I had a car my belongings stayed in the trunk
Amanda
2024-09-11 11:28:00 +0000 UTCIt’s pronounced gren-itch
Taylor Baldwin
2024-08-06 15:59:12 +0000 UTCJustin I love you and your takes on the whole pick me thing cause SAME
Anissa Jasper
2024-07-02 06:50:14 +0000 UTCI’m new to this platform but ughh Justin stop. I had to skip Justin’s rants about the whole pick me thing. I’m just trying to hear the stories
Diana -
2024-07-01 17:30:06 +0000 UTComg the pick me argument ahahah hilarious
Asiayana
2024-06-03 20:44:07 +0000 UTCJustin’s defense of pick me’s in this episode is so frustrating I couldn’t even finish listening to it lol
Charlotte Rice
2024-05-15 19:54:57 +0000 UTCJustin was extra funny this episode omg
Cedar Kenny
2024-04-07 22:04:04 +0000 UTCjust became a second tier member and i’m binging all the bonus episodes, in regards to the first story, they aren’t going to visit the husband in prison? like that’s so strange to me. considering she continues to call him her husband implies that they are still together…she’s not visiting him? or letting her kids visit their dad? i had friends growing up who would go visit their parents in prison and they were so excited to see their parent. i think that’s so weird.
Elizabeth Diedam
2024-02-19 18:27:53 +0000 UTCWhy is Justin so mad at the term pick me 😅
Andy Silva
2023-12-29 21:25:06 +0000 UTCI'm catching up on old episodes and tickled by how disgusted Justin is by the concept of 'pick me people'. What a doll!
A.B.C.
2023-12-09 11:45:32 +0000 UTCMy dad left me on the side of the road when I was 15 because I accidentally over drafted my bank account once and I had to walk 13 miles home. It was super scary. I’m 33 now and I’ve still never forgotten 🥴
Kelly Minear
2023-10-07 12:43:24 +0000 UTCI hope that dad’s post got crossposted to r/amithedevil
Christy
2023-08-29 01:09:03 +0000 UTCohh my gosh this reminds me of when my mom left me on the side of the road when i was 16 because i missed a few days of my medication. there was a barely any cell service and she never told me if she was coming back. i called my dad and eventually she came back. i can also say these are NEVER isolated incidents.
evian🪼
2023-08-28 16:52:30 +0000 UTCi think “pick-me” definitely can be over-used and was used wrong against morgan in that comment, but it definitely merits “being a thing” because what most women are referring to regarding “pick-me” women is internalized misogyny that is being weaponized against other women in order to be held in higher esteem by men (at least this was how it was originally being used until ppl diluted its use). look at someone like pearl who has made a large internet platform by regurgitating incel talking points. like i will call her a pick-me because she actively says i as a woman don’t deserve the right to vote so she can get money and a platform from men. it is highly linked to uplifting the patriarchy.
Kennedy W.
2023-08-17 06:02:27 +0000 UTCI understand the confusion around what a pick me is and why Justin thinks it’s not a big deal. I can definitely see certain instances where people showing pick me behavior isn’t a big problem, but you shouldn’t discredit that there are certain pick me’s can do really toxic things. I used to be friends with a pick me, and her favorite way of putting other women down was to become friends with men who she KNEW were abusers. She had no interest in befriending a man who violently abused me, but after I broke down and told her what happened to me she made it her life’s mission to be his best friend. She later did the same with one of my fiends ex’s who was abusive and EXTREMELY violent towards women. Sometimes pick me’s are just petty or annoying, but you can’t discredit that there are pick me’s who are horrible to other women just for the sake of getting men’s attention.
Anna
2023-04-17 01:33:43 +0000 UTCI am so late this but a good definition of pick me is someone who dims someone else's candle in order to make themselves appear brighter, usually to gain favor of someone of the opposite sex. It's a form of gatekeeping. I have seen this among the gaming community. I have seen girls in co-ed, male dominated gaming spaces saying things like "I don't hang out with other girl gamers because I am not like them. They play games like Animal Farm or the Sims. I play real games like Call of Duty or Metal Gear Solid." All that is unnecessary. She is basically discrediting someone else so that she can look better.
Christie
2023-04-05 23:21:22 +0000 UTCMy first time renting a room was a nightmare because the owner was like the military dad. I PAID to live there, (and signed a lease) but he kept adding rules. I wasn’t allowed to eat in my room because he wanted me to socialize with him and his friend, He didn’t want me to have my boyfriend over without his permission even though we werent intimate yet and we only hung out in my bedroom, and there was a few other things. He was also in the military in the past. I had to move out within 3 months.
Gabriela Guevara
2023-02-27 22:28:16 +0000 UTCYea it’s so sad I am also mad at the whole “ my kids learned hot to pick up after them selves by kindergarten” comment. It’s like yea dude you taught them to do that. They didn’t just do it on there own. She might have not had parents at that time teaching her these things.
Laura Mcdowell
2022-09-15 13:14:04 +0000 UTCOkay so when you gave the example of a pick me and used the name Laura I was like what MEEEEEE. LOLOL
Laura Mcdowell
2022-09-15 13:11:09 +0000 UTCThe pick me story is so weird like wtf 🤣 It was so unnecessary and a weird way to get attention . She would hate my playlist.
Nia Violet
2022-09-12 12:46:17 +0000 UTCi love justin but idk how u didnt strangle him while explaining pick me
Mary Hallaren
2022-08-27 18:15:20 +0000 UTCHiii!! Okay so the things about the wife having been in the foster system, while that may not be a reason for her being messy (although who knows, maybe it is a trauma response to never being allowed to have or accumulate belongings), putting her shit in trash bags is DEFINITELY triggering of that time in her life, foster kids often get treated like lower class citizens, especially older teens about to age out of the system, and often times all their stuff IS just tossed in trash bags and left at doors. Heartless. This man has too much army in him not enough dad.
Jamie-lee Deschenes
2022-08-15 11:39:53 +0000 UTChey Greenwich is in England ❤️ but the line is throughout several countries. I also would love a pick me ep I had several bad incounters with those and would love to hear how did other people handled them..
Avigail4070
2022-05-31 10:58:47 +0000 UTCI would love a "pick me" episode! Reading the stories isn't being a pick me because you and your guest host will not be putting down anyone to elevate your self.
Blue8Angel6
2022-05-29 22:38:25 +0000 UTCOP #2 has my blood boiling. DIL may have felt zero personal security and control in the foster system, which she's barely out of. It may be why she wants to see all her stuff at once. She's now traumatized enough to see her car as the only safe space in which she won't lose what personal things she has... Like, what the actual fuck?
Belinda B
2022-05-29 13:10:56 +0000 UTChahaha should be a good time
Two Hot Takes
2022-05-29 02:00:00 +0000 UTCListening to this after the edible kicking in hard 😂
Kelsey
2022-05-29 01:45:05 +0000 UTC
