Big on Broadway: Chapter 1

“Oh my god, it’s Riley and Roger! I follow you guys on instagram! Can I get a photo?”

Riley and Roger were the darling gay couple of the Broadway world. They’d been an item for three years, living together two years, and Instagram famous for one year. Each had a prominent role in different Broadway plays and were considered up and comers on the scene. Unlike the generations before them, Riley and Roger elevated their status through social media. They had a following of lusty gay men and teen girls who fawned over their tight bodies and dashing good looks online.

They posed for the photo with the young female fan before heading into their apartment building. The mood was a bit more grim than usual, for the prior evening one of the stage techs on Roger’s play was badly injured and an investigation was underway to determine if the old stage mechanics were up to par. The threat of the show getting pulled was looming.

“How about I whip up a pizza from scratch and we crack a bottle of wine to distract ourselves from this?” Riley suggested.

Riley was a phenomenal cook and pastry chef in his spare time. He grew up in a family of cooks and cuisine came naturally to him. For the most part, he cooked the majority of the food for the two of them but had to be careful about making things too fattening. Both men were prized for their physique as much as their talent and couldn’t risk putting on any weight. In the past, this was difficult for Roger, who was a chubbier as a kid. However, he now had a highly choreographed and physically demanding role that kept him shoveling down calories to burn during the show.

“That sounds phenomenal, hun,” Roger replied.

Naturally, the pizza Riley cooked was delicious and gained a few thousand likes on Instagram while the two had a lovely evening chatting and watching a movie at home together. The next morning the couple woke up a bit hungover from the wine. Roger looked at his phone and his stomach dropped. A text message from a colleague informed him that all shows were cancelled indefinitely while an investigation was underway.

“It’ll be fine, Roger, this is just a PR move and you will be back on the stage in no time. Don’t worry about it.”

“But what if they just cancel it outright? It’s a pretty rickety production, honestly, and that building is so old. I wouldn’t be surprised. I could be out of a job before we know it.”

“Let’s calm down and ride things out. We’re hungover and jumping to conclusions. Why don’t I whip up some chocolate chip pancakes and hash browns to soak up the alcohol?”

“Might as well!” Roger replied exasperated.

~

After a week of no shows Roger was becoming increasingly worried. Not only was he looking at the prospect of losing his first big Broadway gig, but he was also growing concerned about his waistline. He had been stress eating everything in sight and without nightly performances to burn it all off, Roger could tell that the weight was beginning to stick.

Like most mornings, the young actor awoke to delicious smells wafting into the bedroom and noticed Riley was not in bed. Feeling bloated from drinking and overeating the night before, he went to the bathroom to pee. As he stood before the toilet he eyed the scale in the corner. He didn’t want to, but he knew he had to do it. Nervously, Roger stepped onto the scale to discover he’d gained four pounds in just a week. Still groggy and naked he walked to the kitchen to see Riley slaving over the stove whipping up something delicious.

“Babe, you can’t keep doing this to me! I’ve put on four pounds already. I can’t eat whatever this is…”

“Four pounds is nothing! You can sweat that out at hot yoga tomorrow. Plus, it’s our anniversary mister! I made this all for you!”

Roger sighed and acquiesced. He couldn’t turn down Riley’s cooking on their anniversary. Plus, it smelled and looked delicious. First up was an omelette stuffed full of cheese and vegetables with a side of rosemary hashbrowns and some fresh fruit. After that was a small parfait and then a dessert of cinnamon raisin french toast. Riley had really outdone himself this time and went overboard on the portions. Still, it was so delicious that Roger gobbled it all up, leaving no leftovers. His counterpart, on the other hand, only ate about half of each serving.

“Babe, I feel fucking pregnant. Why’d you do that!”

“I just wanted to make something nice for us is all! Besides you better make room because we have a very nice dinner reservation this evening.”

“Oh lord, okay… after today I’m going on a diet. But first I think I need a nap.”

Roger slept off his food baby and woke up feeling refreshed. The boys skipped lunch and went for a romantic walk through central park with coffees from their favorite spot in town. That evening, they got all suited up for their fancy dinner. Although the restaurant’s portions were tiny, Riley had ordered the chef’s special which was a six course meal costing hundreds of dollars. Inevitably, everything tasted delicious and by the end of the meal both boys were pleasantly full.

“Are you excited for Fran’s birthday party tomorrow?” Riley asked on the way home.

“Oh god, I forgot. What is he doing again? A beer garden?”

“Yeah a beer garden at Lucy’s.”

“Christ, well I guess my diet starts the day after tomorrow.”

“Well, the day after tomorrow we’re visiting my mom, remember? And… well… you know how she likes to feed us.”

“I really cannot catch a break, huh? I’m setting up a personal trainer starting next week.”

Fran’s party was a huge success with delicious beer and gourmet local pizza. Everyone had a blast, including Roger and his voracious appetite. While he was trying to keep a cap on his consumption at four beers, he quickly lost count and the night became a blur. He didn’t even have a clue as to how much of the pizza he ate, but could tell it was a lot from how bloated he was the next morning. Riley, on the other hand, did not go overboard and feigned ignorance when Roger sought answers as to how much he consumed.

Not surprisingly, the boys’ visit to Riley’s mother’s place in New Jersey wasn’t much different. She had spent the whole day prior baking an expansive spread of homemade treats and supplemented them with charcuterie and expensive wine. Roger couldn’t help himself and filled up quickly on cheese and meats while sipping wine. Even as he reached his own capacity, Riley’s mom continued to push the baked goods on them. She would accept Riley’s refusals but knew that Roger’s constitution was weak, and continued to guilt trip him until he had tried two servings of everything she’d concocted. Once again, Riley chauffeured a drunken and stuffed Roger home.

By the time his appointment with the physical trainer arrived, Roger had completely forgotten about it. He was busy at home eating a McDonald’s breakfast he had delivered. He never bothered to book another appointment.