Combat Healer Ch. 66
Added 2024-10-07 02:35:47 +0000 UTCOctober 6, 2024
NOTE: This chapter is a fairly pivotal moment, in terms of ‘reveals’ are concerned. Hopefully you guys enjoy it.
<< Chapter 65 | Ch 1 (Book 1) | Ch 15 (Book 2) | Ch 29 (Book 3) | Ch 43 (Book 4) | Ch 57 (Book 5)
- CHAPTER 66 -
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FEEDBACK: Thoughts?
So yeah, not sure how jaw dropping of a reveal that was, but hopefully you guys enjoyed this chapter. I am 'hoping' that how the MC supposedly got his name doesn't seem dumb.
1. Was it 'just okay,' or better than that?
2. Thoughts on the goddess?
Chapter 67 >>
Comments
I understand the distinction you are making, and I appreciate your desire to give readers the thoughts of your character so they can understand the motivations and struggles your character experiences. I agree with you that it is a balance. However, I feel you may have been running down the rabbit hole of minutia more than usual recently. I enjoyed the general thrust of what you have been doing with the storyline.
Florida Reader
2024-10-14 23:34:26 +0000 UTCYou mentioned writing 'stream-of-consciously' and I thought I'd just clarify that I personally am not writing stream of consciously. As in, I'm frequently not writing everything down in one go. Often times, I will write something that is basically the bare bones of a scene, and then I'll go back and consider what the MC might be thinking, and what might need to be added for clarification. The reason I do that is because, even though people sometimes complain about the thoughts, I've had so many more people complain that they either don't understand why the MC made the decision he made, or else I'm having the MC 'remember' relevant information to work through an issue because reader's forget that relevant information. And I've had people say, "Hey, trust your readers, we remember stuff" and for every person who says that, there's like a whopping 50 people who don't remember something that happened two chapters ago. Which makes sense if they are reading a bunch of other stuff, but only reinforces why I add in so many details. Now, because of the complaints of 'too much thoughts' I have made an effort to try to make it somewhat more concise, but it's difficult to find that balance point. That being said, I am not personally writing stream-of-consciously as if I'm just regurgitating my own personal unfiltered thoughts. Even though I write in first person, every character is a main character to me. As in, I could grab Miriam's character, or a side character like Nick or Mr. Copeland, and start writing a narrative where they are the main character. And in doing so, they would have different thoughts and a different 'stream-of-consciousness' and yet I could do that switch on the fly and have it truly feel like a different character, with different ways of thinking and different motivations, etc.
Author Kaizer Wolf
2024-10-12 19:35:18 +0000 UTCIt’s not that I dislike the story. In all honesty Combat Healer was the only reason I joined your Patreon. I didn’t even know about IDH. I did read it and it’s enjoyable. However the extremely slow build of a story just isn’t my thing. I don’t mind a long story. I actually prefer them more. Your earlier arcs as you say sped by faster. Encompassed more per chapter. As you’ve gotten deeper into the story your way of writing IDH has bled over to Combat Healer. There’s a lot of meat to a chapter. But if you took out 2/3’s of the words you wrote I would still get the gist of what the whole thing said. That’s my main complaint. You don’t always have to add a couple hundred words that you only need ten to say. Do you get what I’m saying? I’m not trying to be an asshole here about this. It’s one of the reasons I usually don’t read IDH until you’re about ten or 15 chapters ahead of where I last read. Usually just skim through till I see some meat.
Dem0n Hunter
2024-10-07 22:45:16 +0000 UTCI thought the concept was not unoriginal, at least in this context. It was unexpected. It certainly opens up a whole new range of possibilities for the story.
Florida Reader
2024-10-07 20:34:01 +0000 UTCThanks! Glad you enjoyed it!
Author Kaizer Wolf
2024-10-07 18:47:07 +0000 UTCGlad to hear it!
Author Kaizer Wolf
2024-10-07 18:47:00 +0000 UTCI just realized it should be Marielle, not Marcelle. Although, not sure what you mean in your first comment 'Marcell's father, she?' -- Are you asking if it's a girl? And yeah, I know the premise is not original, but I wanted a way to explain why he is 'special' but not 'unique.'
Author Kaizer Wolf
2024-10-07 18:46:28 +0000 UTCBeing in constant pain, especially when it's a constant strong 'aching' pain, can definitely make one very irritable. So to your description: 'mercurial overpowered toddler and desperate pain addled schizophrenic' - I would say...Yes. Basically. As to the Adapt skill replacement, I have an idea of what I want to do, but I'm a bit uncertain of how everyone will react to it being a bit too overpowered. Not in the sense that he can 'one-shot' defeat an enemy, but rather in ways that would make his capacity to fight and survive far exceed the average person.
Author Kaizer Wolf
2024-10-07 18:43:52 +0000 UTCIf you are struggling to enjoy the story, then what are you looking forward to, or wanting to see, that you feel like is being delayed? Is there something you specifically want to see happen soon?
Author Kaizer Wolf
2024-10-07 18:29:28 +0000 UTCYeah, I know the concept definitely isn't original, but I felt like it was the best way to explain how he was 'special' without being 'unique.'
Author Kaizer Wolf
2024-10-07 18:28:23 +0000 UTCI've sincerely given this comment a lot of thought. It's made me think about the pacing and how I might speed things up a little again. However, I also sort of did a skim of previous chapters/books, and feel like the pacing has mostly been the same. Each 'scene' is often 3-5 chapters, and then there might be a summation of anywhere between a few hours to a few days. Each 'arc' has been roughly 15-20 chapters. As an example, being in the Engulfing Dungeon was an 'arc' (getting there, getting stuck in Dungeon, the fight with the Spider monsters, meeting Wren, rescuing the Top Team, getting out, meeting the dark elf Alyssa, etc.) and then visiting the Ryfle kingdom was also an 'arc' (meeting the king, meeting Blake, rescuing the princess, discovering more about the enemy, getting summoned by Blake's mother, saving princess Marta, saving Hailey, and finally getting back to the Queen's castle, where we are now in the story). The majority of the story involves people talking. This chapter in particular is like 80% active talking and/or interacting between Allister and Beatrix. The other 20% is Allister reminiscing 'just enough' on the past (all new information) so that the reader understands what happened when he was younger. If this was an IDH chapter, the recollection of 'his childhood' probably would have been an entire chapter by itself. And then everything leading up to Beatrix biting him would have been a separate chapter (I would have had a chapter split between him losing consciousness and waking up again, so that the chapter split itself helped establish that some time had passed). But instead of doing that, I tried to give the effect of him waking up and falling unconscious again, rather than saving the 'next part' for the next chapter. They were then in a seemingly new location (on the boat in a sea of stars), and there was more interaction and talking, which is what most of the story has been up until this point. I can't help but wonder if the reason why you feel like there wasn't any progression (or the progression was slow) is because almost no time passed for everyone else, but we will probably be 'skipping days' in the next chapter anyway, so I'm not sure that should matter much. We've already skipped a lot of days. We skipped days between 'exiting the Engulfing Dungeon' and then Allister getting back to the capital. We skipped days between 'becoming Ambassador' and getting to Ryfle. And then we skipped days on the trip back to Delanor (from Ryfle). That's been the general pacing so far, and I don't think it's really changed. Now, if you just aren't enjoying the story, just in general, then that's something else entirely. All I can say is that the next chapter will likely summarize several days of the aftermath, rather than focusing on every little interaction that happens afterward (as would be the case if the pacing was like IDH).
Author Kaizer Wolf
2024-10-07 18:23:43 +0000 UTCShe was 'officially introduced' in the last two chapters. She's the elf healer who was there when the Blue Oni Lesser Eldritch attacked Lyla and also killed an elf healer (who was Marcelle's friend). And...I just realized the problem. Her name is Marielle, not Marcelle. I will fix that!
Author Kaizer Wolf
2024-10-07 17:33:56 +0000 UTCSo, I liked the chapter, and I see how this storyline expands the universe of the possible for you to branch off from. We have a boy who was saved in a dungeon by a monster who then becomes this uber dude. We then find he is actually a boy who was on earth but magically got transported into this world, somehow went into a dungeon, almost died, and was blessed by a deity, only to get later stuck in a dungeon, rescued by a monster, and return to the land of the living with his love now years older and he orders of magnitude more powerful. It certainly opens up more storylines to explain away the crazy OP abilities he is accumulating. It gives some back story to this universe, potential origins of the eldritch and the oni, and hints at a new class of beings that we have not yet met. I do agree that you run the risk of getting sucked into minutiae once again, slowing the storyline to less than a crawl. This is a danger you run in your writing -- I think it is because you like to write stream-of-consciously, exposing us to every thought of your character. It can be overdone, as I have cautioned you in the past.
Florida Reader
2024-10-07 15:52:37 +0000 UTCEnjoyable chapter. But I liked this story when it was moving quite faster. You’ve taken this story and matched it to IDH in its slow moving style. Please speed this one back up and get away from the knats ass details. It was good how this started in the beginning. I can’t really enjoy it anymore now.
Dem0n Hunter
2024-10-07 14:58:03 +0000 UTCOK, interesting, but won't this just..... kinda aggravate the other demi-diety on the other side of the equation? Also, adapt has been literally the difference between life and death for Allistair, how on earth will that be compensated for? Additionally, who else here thinks that Vildread isn't going to outright start demanding Allistair's head after this latest incident? As to Lady Berserk, she seems a mix of mercurial overpowered toddler and desperate pain addled schizophrenic? (at least for now?)
Rhys
2024-10-07 11:47:47 +0000 UTCWho is Marcell again?
J Bone
2024-10-07 09:11:19 +0000 UTCGreat chapter. I figured there was something different about Allister. I wonder how he got taken from his world and placed in this magical one... I wonder what new power he was given. And why did the goddess kiss him? Does she find him attractive because she doesn't get any visitors...
J Bone
2024-10-07 09:11:10 +0000 UTCIt seemed like there was just no pleasing the goddess lol
Moi465
2024-10-07 06:29:53 +0000 UTCThe reveal, honestly, I've watched too much anime for the reveal to be surprising. Lol
Moi465
2024-10-07 06:27:36 +0000 UTCLoved the ending lines
Moi465
2024-10-07 06:26:16 +0000 UTCMarcell's father, she?
Moi465
2024-10-07 06:26:01 +0000 UTCOverall great chapter with lots of information on MC and goddess.
Reigningrajester
2024-10-07 05:54:21 +0000 UTCGood catch. I fixed it.
Author Kaizer Wolf
2024-10-07 03:57:22 +0000 UTCThat was a great and informative chapter. Keep up the great work
Tim Wininger
2024-10-07 03:34:12 +0000 UTCWell, i loved it🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻 all the unexpected surprises are what keep me on the edge of my seat waiting for the next chapter!
Camron Quigley
2024-10-07 03:31:45 +0000 UTCGreat chapter. I did notice a misspelling in the first sentence. Endless should be endlessly. "Seemed to be floating endlessly upward."
Thouz83
2024-10-07 03:29:17 +0000 UTC
