SubHuMANT

Content victim

Flop Job

Hide and go die

Sorry for not uploading anything last week, the heat was unbearable ... rendering simply was not an option ... :'(

Assisted Termination

Sex toy

Luxury service ride

Under pressure

In the thick of it

Unaware on the phone

Unaware subway stairs

Dangle under desk

Humiliating thirst

Passenger footrest

Joy ride

Discovered in patient's room

Second view of the scene, from another pov.

Medical Discharge

Final lick

Futa pleasuring

I'm back, been able to spit out a couple renders to kickstart the feed again ...

Sorry, starting off with something that probably not everyone will enjoy :/
Will be making more "typical" renders next.

Ok ... finally an update.

Where to start ... why not with me.

My own health issues, although not as bad as they were a few weeks ago, seem to have slowly been getting better ... my throat issue (swallowing & breathing) did get better, but in the past couple days I've had a few episodes of choking.
But I am identifying the foods and liquids that trigger such events, and have been avoiding them as best as I can (still sometimes get surprised by some foods that trigger it).

Now, my parents.

My mom got back from the convalescence clinic she was staying at (so no longer need to travel there and back a few times a week), and seems to be walking pretty well (considering the circumstances) and has become autonomous once again.

My dad on the other hand, has had some serious issues, leading him to sitting me down for the dreaded "if something happens to me, here is where all my papers are, and here is who to call" discussion.
Not going to lie, that kind of discussion hits very hard when it concerns someone you love.

I've had a few sleepless nights since (talk about a mental burden) ... but anyway, for anyone wondering, his hemoglobin count fell down to 8.8, instead of 12-18.

He got extremely tired, I found him slouched in places a couple times (before he got his blood checked) and he said he was tired (like, yeah, hindsight being 20/20, no shit sherlock ...).

I've been buying foods and liquids like beetroot juice that help boost hemoglobin, and he's seen the doctor who gave him some meds which seem to have him feeling better.

So, personally, with this looming threat of health issues in my family, there is still an excess of stress in my life.

My own issues have taken a back-seat, and it goes without surprise to anyone (I hope) that, well, "side projects" that I've done in my free time ever since I started have also fallen to the "non essential" "bin" in my scheduling of daily / weekly activities.

Things are getting better, from my ow understanding of what I've been told.

I do have 3 weeks of imposed "holidays" coming up, well, not really, it's what we call APLD in France, it's forced "stay at home time whilst being paid 84% of salary, time during which the company can call you with 3 days notice and you have to go back, for however many days (or hours) they need you.
And I'll still have my 5 weeks of holidays to place whenever I want (can, always depends on if they'll allow me to take it when I ask for it), of which 2 are automatically set for Christmas.

My APLD time starts on March 24.

I'll do my best, hoping things get better till then, to get some renders done and resume the upload schedule I had prior to all of these family / health issues.

Once again, I sincerely feel awful for not uploading for so long, or getting enough free time during which I even feel like making content, since I've just been exhausted, run dry on motivation once all of my obligations have been done.

Found myself sitting at the computer, looking at the screen of a video that had finished for minutes, not even thinking about anything ,just sitting there. In a comatose ... doing nothing.

So I once again can't thank you enough for the patience you've all shown, and the understanding that a few of you have shared with me. Warms my heart to think that there are people out there watching my content who truly appreciate not just the content, but the person behind, creating the content.

The moral support really does help, even if it's just a couple kind words.

So, thanks.

And as the Terminator said before: I will be back !!  (thumbs up, sinking into lava)

State of affaires update:

Hey, I'd like to start this update off by saying thanks to every single one of you, for your patience and understanding.

I'm not dead, I'm not gone ... and it looks like there's some light at the end of the tunnel.

So where am I at the time of writing this:

Home ... in front of my computer, duh xD

Ok dumb jokes aside, as I said, it looks like the fog of war is slowly dissipating in my life after this very hard first month and a half of 2025 ... I'm starting to breath again ... figuratively and literally.

In regards to my health, the medication has been working.

I've been able to start breathing correctly for the past week.

Swallowing is still an issue though, but it depends on what I eat or drink, as some food and fluids still seem to cause a production of excessive thick saliva which eventually get's stuck in my throat, leading me to gagging and vomiting.

So I've identified some of those foods and fluids and stopped ingesting them.

I've been working out, and many chest pains I used to have seem to have subsided.

Might be due to my blood vessels dilating due to the physical effort and need for more blood-flow. Either way I'll keep it up.

Now, my parents.

The prime reason I've had no time at all recently.

So, my mom is getting out of the convalescence clinic on Thursday 13, meaning my dad will have someone with him to help.

Obviously, just because she's allowed to return home, does not mean she's autonomous and fully capable, so I'm still "required" to keep up the care I've been providing my dad, I'll just be doing the same for my mom (though, to a lesser extent) and also helping my mom with stuff she's not yet fully capable of doing again.

My dad's condition on the other hand has gotten a little worse, not going to say what's wrong because that's nobody's business than my own and that of my family, but I'll admit I'm afraid that it's a repeat of my grandmother ... who was very well until she slipped and broke her hip ... dying 5 years later from the snowball it caused at age 98 (and to think she smoked like a fireman every day since she was 17).

He (my dad) does have me very worried.

He's overweight from past issues, and it's caused the issues he's currently afflicted by ... issue is, he's no longer in a condition where he can lose weight without going on a drastic diet, which is made even more complicated by the fact he can't eat certain foods. Much like myself, he is also heavily depressed, which further complicates things.

I'm doing my best, even giving him tough love sometimes when required.

But I can see a repeat of what happened to his mom (my grandmother, only one I knew, since both grandparents on my moms side died during WW2).

I am very sorry I haven't had free time, or had the willpower to work on renders these past few weeks.

I also recently went to see a barber, to find a solution to my balding, and, well he's an honest person ... I'm now pretty much bald (0.8mm cut), but he did magic to my beard, looks so much better than what I'm able to do on my own.

Balding ... yet another stress in my life, and to think I had a full head of hair to below my shoulders in my 20's.

Life isn't fair.

But yeah, sorry again for the lack of content.

I'll try to get back to rendering as soon as I can, I do greatly appreciate the patience though.

And, to be perfectly honest, I'd prefer to not upload rushed trash for the sake of uploading something, rather focusing on renders I personally like, think are decent, and want to upload.

I'm at 10k watchers now !!

Can't be uploading shit for yall, got a "reputation" to uphold ^^

TLDR: Sorry

Hey there ... been a while.

Ok, again I failed to do my "job" and keep you updated during "hard times" ... so here's be doing my due and informing you about what's happened recently.

Well, I had 2 weeks of holidays at Christmas which turned out to be hell for me ... and no holidays at all in the end.

First week of holidays I was unable to breath correctly, had to visit my doctor urgently and got administered "Ventoline" ... helped a lot as my throat was constricted.

Relief didn't last long as next week, I was unable to swallow, and my gag reflex (greatly enhanced since I choked on an ice cube when I was 6 yo) was going haywire ... was an infernal circle of me being unable to swallow, saliva and shit getting stuck in my throat, me gagging and vomiting ... after puking, trouble breathing again, then couldn't swallow rince and repeat for days on end.

Yeah, Christmas this year was no gift at all.

Finally got medication narrowed down to help, and I now have a fibroscopie scheduled for the first of April (ikr ... what a joke ... where I'm going to have to plead the person doing it to me to put me to sleep ... otherwise Imma be puking all over their equipment and room.

So, slowly "healed" thanks to the meds (did scans and echography's etc, nothing obvious came up, we're waiting on the fibro to learn more about what's ailing me), it was then my parents who fell "sick" again.

I just haven't had any time, between work and my parents.

My mother got operated on recently ,and has been in a convalescence home since the operation, and I've been doing trips to and from ever since, multiple times per week, and because my mom isn't home with my dad, who also has health issues and can barely walk anymore, I'm now doing laundry, cooking, shopping (which I already did for my parents), cleaning (which I also already helped with), and well, overall taking care of my dad whilst my mom isn't there.

For anyone wondering, they're both 78 years old.

And my sister, who has her own family, decided to split up with her boyfriend and daughter's father ... who's turned out to be an absolute trash piece of shit, as he's been "taking revenge" on her by not doing his duty and doing what he initially promised he'd do: fix her car ...

So, apparently, as the only "capable" man left in my entire family, it's been trust upon me to also help my sister financially and buy her a new car ...

I've lent her the money, as she's in the process of finding a new job because she was off work, taking care of the kid.

Also got an expensive surgery for my father coming up soon, for which I'm also going to be paying for it (although that will be 100% reimbursed by social security ... I still need to front the money first).

So, how can I put it.

I'm stressed beyond anything I've experienced before ... stretched in every direction for the people I love (which helps me actually accept why I'm doing all this), but yeah. Idk what to say.

I am sorry I have not been able to upload anything recently.

If I knew all this shit was about to fall on me, I would have never uploaded 2 renders a week before Christmas ... I'd have stretched my "buffer" as much as possible.

But hey, 10k watchers !!!

Sad I'm not earning anything significant from it ...

Ok sorry, that's unfair to say.

But all this "real life" that's thrust it's self upon me in less than a couple weeks after the new year ... was not expecting any of it, and I'm absolutely flabbergasted at how I'm the only one in my family who's now "somewhat stable" ...

Sure, I'm eternally single, unable to find love, or someone outside of my family who actually gives a fuck about me, I'd love to have someone to cuddle with after a hard day even if I'm used to it now ... and sure, I know I'm not the easiest to love, far from it ... I'm deep set in my habits. Those who know, will understand.

But damn, sometimes I wish there was someone.

And cherry on top ... I'm drinking again.

The sudden stress of what fell on me this new year crushed me, was not ready for it ... had a been from a "past reflex" to deal with "hard life shit", and now I'm drinking again.

I fucked up a 1.5 year record of abstinence from alcohol, and already put on 6kg.

So yeah, that's the state of things and why I'm currently not uploading.

My bad ...

I'll try to find some time to get back to it ... I do still enjoy creating these renders after-all.

And I need the little money it does bring in anyway here. Which is at the moment of writing 102€ a month.

(My earnings are public here on Patreon ... I don't see why I'd hide it)

Sorry for "unpacking" here in this post ... guess I needed to tell "someone" (it's not like I actually know any of you ...), to at least get something off my chest.

Fk it, who cares anyway.

TLDR: I'm sorry.

Under the sofa

10k Watchers !!!

If you wish to read the (belated) thanks, please consider checking DeviantArt where this achievement has been reached !!

Link below:

https://www.deviantart.com/subhumant/art/10k-Watchers-1138676638

Selling your Soul (Scat)

Made this a little while ago, never dared to upload it ... but to hell with it.
Won't be making any more of these (scat) renders, unless requested ... just had the models and thought it would be stupid not to use them.

Hope it doesn't trigger any sensitivities lol

Cruel Shoejob

Beneath her heel

Hanging on

Trampled

Last Light

Bobba Snack