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1900HOTDOG

1900HOTDOG

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1900HOTDOG posts

Extra Wiener 192 - MORE Bladesmen with Michael Swaim

Seanbaby, Brockway and Michael Swaim dive a little deeper into the insanity that is Craig Storman's vision of... squawk?


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Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 192, Bladesmen with Michael Swaim

Seanbaby and Brockway welcome special guest and fellow Cracked alum Michael Swaim to the DOGGZZONE to discuss what can loosely be described as a barbarian comic book but can more accurately be described as, SQUAAAAWWWWK!

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Teamworking Day: Project Nim Part 1

As we are pulled screaming through the cosmos by the whimsy of fate, impossible destinies collide. Such a collision has happened here, hotdoggers! Unlikely partners Dennard and Sissyneck have somehow found themselves sharing apes! Enjoy part 1 of this unexpected Teamworking Day.

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Punching Day: Dollman

I dare you not to smile when I describe the premise of the movie Dollman to you. The main character is a cop, stop, wait, come back. He's a tiny cop, thirteen inches tall, and his superpower isn't his smallness. This is not an Ant Man scenario. His superpower is that he owns the most powerful gun on earth, so even though he's teeny tiny, he still shoots people with the force of a ...

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Video Podcast: BIGFEETS - Episode 28, Psychic Bigfoot vs. A Polite Request

BIGFEETS has a video podcast now! Come watch our handsome faces as they actually form the words you love! This time we're talking about the psychic pedophile bigfoot finale! Those ones, those are the words you love.

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BIGFEETS - Episode 28, Psychic Bigfoot vs. A Polite Request

The Bigfeet Boys watch Season 2, Episode 8 of Mountain Monsters: The Bigfoot of Ashe County: AIMS Erupts. Psychic Bigfoot's feelings were hurt in the making of this episode.

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Hot Dog Store: The BIGFEETS Shirt

You have awoken naked in the woods, a victim of psychic bigfoot attack. Only one garment can hide the shame you feel...

Our BIGFEETS shirt!

Blocks ALL psychic bigfoot waves!*



*For novelty ...

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Hot Dog Store: Double Doggone Shirt

Buy the shirt, say you remember the classic Seanbaby and Brockway sprites from Hot Dog: Year One.

 

Choose your fighter! They have identical movesets and hitboxes, but Seanbaby's uppercut inflicts burning damage while Brockway's spit attack inflicts hepatitis.

2024-09-07 18:00:02 +0000 UTC View Post

Punching Day: True Police Cases

Men! Some hardy women! Get ready! For bullet-hardened cops and brasier-hardened bosoms! Prepare yourself! For shocking real facts from True Police Cases!

2024-09-06 12:00:08 +0000 UTC View Post

Learning Day: The Ugly Truckling

The Tesla Cybertruck: wait, stop, where are you going. Come back. I applaud your blanket aversion to CyberTruck HorseHockey. But look at this thing I found:

The Ugly Truckling: The Story Of My Cybertruck is a children’s book. It’s a children’s book about the Cybertruck, ...

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Fucking Day: Man2Man Alliance

Younger readers might not know this, but there used to be more than six or seven websites. People owned their own domains, and when I say "people," I mean human beings with names like "Steve" and "darklady89," rather than demented flesh golems named "Elon" or "Mark." They would open up Notepad, write some crude HTML, and put their unfiltered thoughts about Hostess Fruit Pies or bad children's a...

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Animated Podcast: Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 191, Vincent Gallo Merch

We have an animated podcast! Come watch us and Jason Pargin talk about the trainwreck that '90s bad boy actor/director Vincent Gallo's life became.

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Extra Wiener 191 - A Very American Book Game with Jason Pargin

Seanbaby is joined by American heroes Brockway and Jason Pargin to honor this great country by reading Gregory J.P. Godek's book, 1001 Ways to Celebrate America. This episode was originally going to run on 9/11. It had to be moved.

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Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 191, Vincent Gallo Merch

Seanbaby and Brockway are joined by guest, Jason Pargin, to rummage through the yard sale that actor/director Vincent Gallo's life has become. Deep discounts on his childhood memories, his racism, and his semen! WOW!

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Nerding Day: Pin-Up Pete

It’s 1952. You’re fourteen. Every nude shoulder makes your year. Then one day, your world changes. You find thirty pages of patriotic, navy-approved cheesecake…and its podcast.

The results have an alien charm. Pin-Up Pete serves at least...

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Learning Day: EGG 🌭

For a long time, I've wanted to cover an early 2000's teen magazine for this website, you know, the ones that were all about girl power! Which meant that girls power the economy by buying our patented anti-ugly bitch cream. While American magazines from this era were pretty nuts, they had nothing on what was going on in Japan, where egg magazine was publishing the latest in Gyaru ...

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Hot Dog Store: The Jimmy Jiggles Shirt!

You remember our mascot, right? His name isn't Jimmy Jiggles, we actually forgot to name or acknowledge him.

Now we're a little afraid to. Buy his shirt, maybe he likes that! We just don't know.

 

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Fucking Day: Nude Vampires

This isn't important, and I don't know why I'm opening with this, but "These ladies of the night are no tooth fairies!" is not a sane tagline for something called Nude Vampires.

Released in 1994 by the makers of 2024-08-30 12:00:10 +0000 UTC View Post

Learning Day: The Buttercream Gang

Alright maybe you remember when youd go over to a new friends house as a kid and there you are getting used to the new smells and carpets and wonderin: is there mom nice or mean? And you get to looking at their movies and theres the normal star wars and disney and stuff but you also see ALOT of ones like this:

2024-08-29 12:00:10 +0000 UTC View Post

Nerding Day: Zero Zero

This is not a LaserDiscs In The Rain column. God, how I wish it were. That would imply that my father showed me Mike Batt’s Zero Zero, on purpose, as a child, and then his soul would carry the terrible burden of that unholy transgression, rather than my own. But, alas and goddammit, I stepped in this one mysel...

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Animated Podcast: Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 190, Top Model Backwards With Dan McQuade

We have an animated podcast! Our two cartoon ghouls and guest Dan McQuade discuss the episode of Top Model where Tyra Banks inserts herself into the lyrics of a memorial ballad.

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Extra Wiener 190 - A Stupid Karate Book Game with Dan McQuade

Seanbaby has dozens of karate solutions for dealing with idiots, but are Brockway and Dan McQuade foolish enough to look for them?

YES!

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Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 190, Top Model Backwards With Dan McQuade

Seanbaby sets an impossible task based on his own vanity: Watch the episode of America's Next Top Model where Tyra Banks inserts herself into the lyrics of terrible songs written by models on half a lunch break. Only Brockway and g...

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Upsetting Day: Here Comes Whiteman! 🌭

Good morning! Ever read comics by the American Nazi Party?

Wanna see their spin on Superman?

Today, we meet Whiteman. No new slurs, bu...

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Video Podcast: Episode 27 - The AIMS Crew vs. Psychic Pedophile Bigfoot

Bigfeets has a video podcast now! Finally, you can watch our handsome mouths pronounce the words "psychic pedophile bigfoot" -- universally agreed to be the most aesthetically pleasing series of human mouth shapes.

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Nerding Day: Web Woman

Web Woman was, without a doubt, the worst superhero to ever do it. She was one of the Super Seven in the show Tarzan And The Super 7. Since she wasn't the title character, she had to be worse at saving people than a man whose superpower was jungle. The pitch for her powers was "Aquaman but with bugs," a power that's only good for mildly inconveniencing people so she ...

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BIGFEETS Episode 27: The AIMS Crew vs. Psychic Pedophile Bigfoot

The Bigfeet Boys watch Season 2, Episode 7 of Mountain Monsters: The Bigfoot of Ashe County: AIMS Under Attack. The sterling reputation of the Cherokee Devil was irreparably damaged in the making of this episode, and there will be legal act...

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Hot Dog Store: BIGFEETS - The Shirt!

You've heard the show, now wear the show! One day you might watch the show, but it is not today.

 

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Hot Dog Store: Crisis On Infinite Berks Shirt

In every universe there is a wolfchild who needs saving. The real tragedy is that not every universe contains the manimal, little person toy genius, or Hulk Hogan speedboat who can save them.

Commemorate all the wolfchildren gone too soon with this somber and dignified memorial shirt, featuring 2024-08-24 18:00:03 +0000 UTC View Post

Teamworking Day: The Austin Powers Collectible Card Game

Brockway: It’s shorthand for despicable hackery now, but in the late ‘90s the Austin Powers series was the biggest comedy franchise in the world. On paper, I don’t hate it. It was an original, high concept comedy whose premise was deeply personal to Mike Meyers. Austin Powers’ entire vibe was just a mash-up of every show he and his dad used to watch together ba...

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