1900HOTDOG

Upsetting Day: Clown Ministry Skits for All Seasons

Hi. Clown ministry. As someone who collects and writes about mistakes by maniacs, it's hard to maintain a perspective on "strange." And so I've ignored this 1990 clown ministry book in the clown ministry section of my library for years. It's called Clown Ministry Skits for All Seasons.

2024-06-14 12:00:14 +0000 UTC View Post

Hot Dog Appreciation Day: Day of the Happy Boys

Welcome, 🌭s, to your day of appreciation. We’re awesome. We know that. We know it so hard that we take turns riding in each other’s BabyBjorns.

But this isn’t about us. This is about you. Did you know you’re awesome? Because you are. We have proof!

First let’s check in on Sissyneck Corner, where anything can be a burrito if you put bean...

Nerding Day: Paparazzi Samurai 🌭

I've covered a number of different children’s properties created by Marty Abrams and his production company, Abrams Gentile Entertainment. They brought us, among other things, Dragon Flyz and Sky Dancers, 2024-06-12 12:00:10 +0000 UTC View Post

Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 179, Gorilla Flow Director's Cut with Jason Pargin

Brockway has found more Gorilla Flow, the hour long infomercial of pure madness. He is joined by fellow gorilla piss specialists Seanbaby and Jason Pargin to discuss what this new lore does to the established Dr. Leo Shub Goril...

Extra Wiener 179 - A Transformative WikiWhy with Jason Pargin

Brockway asks Seanbaby and guest, Jason Pargin, to play a leaf-collecting, forest disappearing game of WikiWhy - the fun bonus game with clear rules and plenty of winners!

Dogg Zzone Animated Podcast - Episode 179, Gorilla Flow Director's Cut with Jason Pargin

We have an animated podcast now! This week it's Jason Pargin, it's samurai ape duels, it's inexplicable Walken, and it's piss, piss, piss. That's right, we found more Gorilla Flow! Watch Episode 179 - Gorilla Flow Director's Cut here!

Nerding Day: Pokemon Black & Blue

I don’t know, Chimchar? Poké-recall is beyond me. I still need name tags for anything that can’t spam Blast Burn.

Christ.

Welcome...

Nerding Day: BratTV Charmers Sponsored by Starburst

Now that we’re all aware of Chicken Girls The College Years: Sponsored By Takis, I think it’s time to wade you into Brat TV’s less chicken flavored offerings. Three years ago, an executive at BratTV, who was probably a fourteen-year-old former Vine star now far past his prime, saw th...

Learning Day: You Can Ventriloquism 🌭

It was 3am and I heard a loud knock at my door. "Finally: karate," I thought. But my door opened only to an empty and unfamiliar street. "Darkness, this is not where I live," I told the wrong outside. As if to answer, an unmarked box sat on my porch, and inside was 132 copies of this book:

...

Punching Day: The Martial Artists Book of the Occult

Magic grifters sell spells and potions to frustrated men in vests, the kind of men who consider themselves poly but don’t have a girlfriend. Karate grifters sell pokes and death touches to men in American flag shorts, the kind of men who are overcome by bloodthirst but unwilling to do a pushup. Because I’m laughably naive, I assume both kinds of men are too mentally unwell to purchase a fir...

Dogg Zzone Animated Podcast - Episode 178, Rambo and His Titans

We have an animated podcast now! For reasons we can't explain! This week it's Dogg Zzone Episode 178, Rambo and His Titans with Patrick Reed - an insane 1990s Argentinian wrestling show about the Rambo cartoon toyline!

Learning Day: There Is A Genie In My Szechuan Sauce

The city’s dead tonight - cold and blue as a corpse on a slab, and fresh sorrow blowing from a muffled sax at the dive bar next door is all that mourns its passing. There’s no work across my desk that can’t be warded off with a few belts of scotch and an “I’ll do it tomorrow.” I should be writing, but my head’s full of bees and stale promises. In other words, it�...

Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 178, Rambo And His Titans With Patrick Reed

Brockway, Seanbaby, and guest Patrick Reed watch a 1990s Argentinian wrestling show about the toyline from the old 1980s Rambo cartoon. It is NOT about Rambo himself, NOT about the cartoon, it was ONLY an adaptation of the toys, ...

Extra Wiener 178 - Dreams Of The Witch With Patrick Reed

Brockway, Seanbaby, and guest Patrick Reed summon two demons using their favorite food - the dreams of witches! Will a naughty catboy and a war himbo love these dreams of banality and despair? Who can say? But probably not!

Learning Day: D.I.Y. Magic

We’ve met plenty of specialist frauds. One-trick posers. Liars with focused depth. But what about breadth? Imagine the Necronomicon for doing fucking nothing, in the name of art. The full power of an Atlantis writing workshop in your hands.

I wished that ...

Learning Day: The GIFTionary

Is it possible to have too much money? Yes, and today, submitted for the approval of the Hotdog Society, I have a book written by a woman who clearly does. Robyn Freedman Spizman has taken many names during her long career: "gifting expert," "super shopper," "Caviar Monthly's Dolphin Skinner Of The Year," etc. You might expect a book called The GIFTionary to be about affordable gi...

Episode 21 - Buck vs. Bigfoot Ghosts

The Bigfeet Boys watch Season 2, Episode 1 of Mountain Monsters: The Bigfoot of Central Kentucky. Bigfoot's ancestors were disturbed in the making of this episode.

Mascot Week: Volto From Mars 🌭

Mascot Week ends here, the only way it ever could: VOLTO FROM MARS.

Volto From Mars was created in 1944, a rocket age champion of man's imagination. He fell from the sky in soap, hunting the stars for cereal grains! And I'm not summing anything up; that's his full origin story. This is how the world met Volto:

2024-05-31 12:00:12 +0000 UTC View Post

Mascot Week: The Insane Tragedy of Rock'n Rollen 🌭

Do you know why people hold up JOHN 3:16 signs at sporting events? If you’re an idiot in Christ, like me, you assumed it was some Bible verse about sports. “And the Lord saw the goal, and it was good.” They’ve probably been doing it forever, holding up JON III:XVI tablets at the Colosseum right before getting demolished by a lion. But really the whole JOHN 3:16/sports thing only start...

Dogg Zzone Animated Podcast - Episode 177, Road House

We've got an animated podcast now! For reasons that are no longer clear to us. There's no logic to any of it. Things fall apart. The center cannot hold. Episode 177 of the Dogg Zzone is loosed upon the world.

Mascot Week: Izzy's Quest for Olympic Gold

What are the Olympics? Are they a celebration of the highest peaks of human achievement in athletics, a reminder of what dedication and hard work can achieve, a venue for friendly competition between the nations of the world? Or are they a corrupt institution whose visitations upon their host cities leave naught but ruin in their wake, an excuse for the freak outliers of human physical ability ...

Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 177, Road House With William Sellari

Seanbaby enters the octagon with Brockway and guest, William Sellari, only to get the holy shit beat out of them by the new Road House movie. WATCH ME PULP YOUR FACE.

Extra Wiener 177 - Thank You For Being A Friend With William Sellari

Seanbaby thanks Brockway and William Sellari for being such good friends, and the means by which he shares his gratitude is betrayal, betrayal most foul.

Mascot Week: Bernard the Bee Boy 🌭

Where are mascots born? A panicked boardroom at 2 AM, with none of the drugs AMC promised. Just a whiteboard with the dumbest shit ten former artists have said in their lives. In the back, a disappointed mentor pockets another call from home. Something about a birthday. He fires a pleading, imminently divorced look.

“Anything.”

You have nothing.

�...

Mascot Week: Supermodelquins 🌭

To kick off Mascot Week, I am bringing you not the tale of a single mascot but many, and they're all fucking. You asked for Mascot Week so I'm opening the dark door at the end of my brain hallway marked Supermodelquins, the 2008 mass delusion Old Navy used to desperately try and sell pants. Do you like celebrities but hate the warmth of humanity in their eyes? Then the Supermodelquins are for...

Teamworking Day: Muryo Waza

Seanbaby: "Sometimes from madness comes masterpiece," is not our website's slogan, but it should be. I think our actual slogan is "101 hamburger jokes." And today, the slogan that isn't ours has never been more true. We are talking about Eddie Vuittonet, an artist and scholar who does everything and can't do any of it. He accidentally hit print on a book about 2024-05-24 12:00:09 +0000 UTC View Post

Fucking Day: Miracle Beach

Alright there I was, bored and weary one night with only infinite content at my disposal and I came across this one:

And I saw Dean Cameron was in it and I dont know who doesnt have fond memories of him in Summer School.

2024-05-23 12:00:05 +0000 UTC View Post

Nerding Day: Mr. Stitch

Although it has long been known that the swirl of individual galaxies is the product of black holes at their centers, it was only recently that physicists came to the consensus that there exists a similar and inconceivably powerful hole-like structure at the center of the universe itself which dictates the motion of all creation. By the mid-60’s, this idea had been explored but ultimately but...

Extra Wiener 176 - Big WikiWhy With Dan McQuade

Brockway and Seanbaby are joined by Dan McQuade for a game of Big WikiWhy - the game that's just WikiWhy, but slightly bigger!

Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 176, Fever Pitch with Dan McQuade

Brockway and Seanbaby are joined by special guest Dan McQuade to discuss Fever Pitch, the gambling scare film that's unsure what gambling is, but thinks it might kick ass. Also featuring: A man being completely destroyed by a salt and...