Have you ever wondered how you could get your own sex worker without paying them? Like a How To guide for getting a topless… intern? Indentured lap servant? No, I'm making it sound evil. What I mean is, you can use social engineering and deceit for some light sex trafficking. Man, I wish there was a cute way to put that…
In 1986, comic book writer, artist, editor, and amateur human cannonball Craig Stormon started his own comic imprint. It was called Blue Comet Press, and there were only a quarter million problems. One loomed larger than others: He had no idea what a comic book was. Not in the artistic sense, definitely not in the story sense, perhaps not in the physical sense. He might’ve thought comic books were a t...
2023-11-30 13:00:08 +0000 UTC View Post
Modern self defense is mostly YouTube instructionals where scrawny Canadians in denim vests try to ninja out of gangland executions. It’s ridiculous, everyone knows none of it would work in real life. Everyone knows it… but has science proven it? Finally the answer is yes! In 2023, self defense YouTubers put their money where their dim maks are. This is the first ever ULTIMATE SELF ...
2023-11-29 13:00:07 +0000 UTC View PostBrockway plays the podcasting trumpet, summoning Seanbaby and guest, Zak Koonce, to watch the forgotten Canadian Mr. T show, T and T. Specifically the episode where a geriatric lone ranger terrorizes a 1980s Canadian...
2023-11-29 12:59:00 +0000 UTC View PostBrockway makes Seanbaby and guest, Zak Koonce, play I PITY THE FALL, HANNIBAL. A game that, let's face it, was mostly the name.
2023-11-29 12:59:00 +0000 UTC View Post
No one. I’m not sure this book exists.
I feel weight, and see text. The pages smell like unwashed fur and embalming fluid. The Little Free Library outside my lair has a paperback-sized gap. Yet 52 Devotions for Cat Lovers is not there.
Novelty waffle makers are The Blob of capitalism. I started noticing them here and there in the early 2000s. A Yoda, or a Mickey Mouse waving at you from your morning pastry is fine and cute, but things have gotten out of hand. The global waffle maker market is currently a $221 million-a-year industry that's projected to see a steady, constant stream of growth through 2033, where it's projected to be wo...
2023-11-27 13:00:08 +0000 UTC View Post
The "worst of all time" has been applied so casually to so many things for so many years it's all but meaningless. And yet when I come across a Worst Something of All Time, there's still a part of me that wonders "is there a way to check that? To prove that?" And after a lifetime of research, I may have found the Worst Superhero of All Time. Our story starts with The Blue Beetle, who is not the guy I'm ...
2023-11-24 13:00:08 +0000 UTC View Post
Meet The Saskatchewan Wheat Pool Adventurer’s Club!
“This can’t be exactly what it looks like,” you’re thinking. “There’s no way you found a superhero comic about staple crops.”
And you’re right. Tragically, you’re right. I did not find the comic books. Those were all lost ...
2023-11-23 13:00:05 +0000 UTC View Post
Do me a favor: close your eyes. I know, I know, but please, just trust me on this. Go ahead, close ‘em. Okay, are they closed? Hey, your mother sucks cocks in Hell and does a really bad job of it. Okay, good, just checking.
Now project into that space, if you will, the future; neither a time nor place, but the very concept itself…the way it makes you feel. For example, a Virtual Boy i...
2023-11-22 13:00:06 +0000 UTC View PostSeanbaby sends Brockway and guest, Katie Goldin, straight to Haunted Insane Asylum Minigun Prison for the crime of loving Escape From Death Block 13 - the prison break movie starring Robert Bronzi, who almost has Charles Br...
2023-11-22 12:59:01 +0000 UTC View PostFind out more about Charles Bronson lookalike Robert Bronzi! Like how did he get his role in Escape From Death Block 13? How did he get his start in acting? What did he do before his acting career? What does he now regard as a curse? See answer key below!
(He looks like Charles Bronson)
2023-11-22 12:59:01 +0000 UTC View Post
One question haunts a comedy/satire/penis simile career: What's your solution?
“Where’s your PMC? Constellis does the best they can. They changed the name and everything. Should they leave bullets lying there, to rot? That’s waste on a dying planet. Bullying Erik Prince won’t make y...
2023-11-21 13:00:06 +0000 UTC View Post
I've found the dating game show our generation deserves. Do we want it? Absolutely not. It abandons everything we know about dating shows. It isn't going through the motions of a "social experiment" in order to convince the right hot people to bone. This is a dating show for gross little goblin people to see if they can locate another gross little goblin who will disgust even them. It's a show for peopl...
2023-11-20 13:00:08 +0000 UTC View PostThe Bigfeet Boys watch Season 1, Episode 8 of Mountain Monsters: The Grafton Monster of Taylor County. Doc was definitely harmed in the making of this episode
2023-11-20 12:59:00 +0000 UTC View Post
Brockway: Ctom, the diaper-chewing maniac behind The President Goes to Heaven, seems to believe every conspiracy theory at once, plus several more he made up. Every one of his ideas is at war with six others, leaving his mind like an old Chevy on a bomb testing range. If his oeuvre has a theme, and it absolutely does not, it’s ctom trying to make peace between the warring cla...
2023-11-17 13:00:08 +0000 UTC View Post
For a brief period in the 1980s, American cinema was very worried about yuppies. Specifically, whether or not yuppies were happy. If you didn’t grow up in the 1980s or have never watched a stand-up special where the comedian is wearing a blazer and standing in front of a brick wall, you might not be familiar with the word “yuppies,” a catchy half-nickname, half-acronym meaning “young upwardly mo...
2023-11-16 13:00:05 +0000 UTC View Post
The other day, I became less aware of gum disease. How? I listened to Alex Rodriguez.
Gah! Him again. Many American sports fans react that way when Alex Rodriguez crosses their screen. “A-Rod” (his words not mine) is a retired athlete, a grindset hokum peddler, and a relentless font of uncanny. Somehow h...
2023-11-15 13:00:06 +0000 UTC View PostBrockway grants magnificent power to Seanbaby and guest, Tom Reimann: The power to discuss Rollercoasters, a 1987 rollerdancing superhero comic from wonderful maniacs, Blue Comet Press. To the public, this podcast will be known as The ...
2023-11-15 12:59:01 +0000 UTC View PostBrockway corners Seanbaby and guest, Tom Reimann, to scream the unhinged editorials of Blue Comet Press EIC Craig Stormon at them until they die from it. Tom does!
2023-11-15 12:59:01 +0000 UTC View Post
I had a solid October. Sleeping more, eating better, ignoring chain letters, moving to 66th 6th Avenue, buying a clock stuck at 4:44 PM on Friday the 13th, hurling broken mirrors into flocks of ravens, giving kids Halloween carrots, the works. Let’s see what’s queued up.
Right.
Introducing: Chi...
2023-11-14 13:00:04 +0000 UTC View Post
We need to talk about Gorgo, the troubled teenage Godzilla. You might have heard of the 1961 British Gorgo film if you're a true connoisseur of the arts, but did you know there was also a 23 issue Gorgo spinoff comic book? I was somehow miraculously able to pull this from a bargain bin at a used bookstore for only two dollars. Sure, it's a little bit damaged by both fire and water, but neither of those ...
2023-11-13 13:00:07 +0000 UTC View Post
2020 was a strange and difficult year for everybody. Who today can forget the battles that raged throughout Empire City between the forces of law and powerful criminal gangs which saw robotic dogs and laser-wielding cowboys take on brain-damaged strongmen and cyborg weasels? Or so it would have been in a different world, a world in which the story of C.O.P.S. was real.
No, not that CO...
2023-11-10 13:00:05 +0000 UTC View Post
Hi everybody you might know i recently cured myself of a cripplin monkeyaphobia by usin compassionite exposure and i have taken advantage of my new flexability and mind freedom to consider a new stretch of simian landscape that before was closed off to me. By meanin i watched the ape movies i was too scared to befo...
2023-11-09 13:00:03 +0000 UTC View Post
Look, I’m not a complicated man (although “man” is strong, lately I’ve been trying to discover a sense of gender identity inside me that really rings true, and wondering if in fact I’m one who doesn’t feel gendered at all, in the conventional sense, and what the appropriate pronouns might be for someone in that boat). Simple. I only operate in two modes: fucking and upsetting. Perusing all t...
2023-11-08 13:00:04 +0000 UTC View PostSeanbaby wanted to do an entire episode about that time Harry Dean Stanton and The Replacements got pants-off drunk and fucked up Saturday Night Live. Brockway and David Bell thought that was a great idea, but they were also ...
2023-11-08 12:59:01 +0000 UTC View PostSeanbaby teaches Brockway and guest, David Bell, all about the joys of learning until their fucking ears bleed.
2023-11-08 12:59:01 +0000 UTC View Post
The Diary of a Wimpy Kid took off when Scholastic read “underdog story” in their own junior dictionary, and gave it a shot. Some kids related. This made veteran author Jocko Willink furious. A generation of budding soldiers were lost without securing a drop of fuel, and no one cared but him and countless rival manfluencers.
That’s not confirmed by anything but my ass. But i...
2023-11-07 13:00:04 +0000 UTC View Post
The week after Halloween is the perfect time to discuss The King’s Hawaiian Sweet Rolls Halloween Movie because, as I’ve mentioned several times in my articles before, no one can stop me. In 2018, King’s Hawaiian Sweet Rolls created a production company called Fresh Baked Films, made precisely one children's movie, and then shuttered that production studio for good. It was a film about a lot of th...
2023-11-06 13:00:08 +0000 UTC View PostThe Bigfeet Boys watch Season 1, Episode 7 of Mountain Monsters: Kentucky Hellhound of Pike County. Wild Bill was briefly killed in the making of this episode.
2023-11-06 12:59:00 +0000 UTC View Post