Upsetting Day: The Pumblechook & Figg Catalogue of the Christ-Mass 2021 π
Added 2021-12-23 13:00:07 +0000 UTC
It was the best of times, it was the end of times. It was all times and no time at all. It was the Great Transversing of the Nameless Ones in our world. In 2021, as every year, it would be opposed by the sacrificial offerings of The Pumblechook & Figg Holidays Catalog of Boxing-Day Gifts.
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If youβre feeling giving this holiday season, Brendan recommends All Hearts & Hands.
This article was brought to you by our fine sponsor and Hot Dog Supreme, Neil Bailey, who is all leg and very little torso and is looking for his brother.
If these images are borked, you can read this article and every other one on the much better in every way 1900HOTDOG.COM.
Comments
This is a magnum opus and I probably didn't appreciate it enough...
Matthew Harris
2021-12-27 02:21:00 +0000 UTCThis is fucking beautiful
Daniel C Kennedy
2021-12-26 23:50:38 +0000 UTCI missed a whole P&F catalog? Christmas came twice this year!
Katherine
2021-12-24 09:46:22 +0000 UTCThere are three previous to this one, but the one you didn't know about is cursed, and can only move through this world in the depth of shadows.
Brendan McGinley
2021-12-24 04:52:45 +0000 UTCWouldn't the Kissing Boy come pre-loaded with the covid packages?
kerry budding
2021-12-24 04:49:31 +0000 UTCA toast of ale, cinnamon and elephantβs morphine to you and to all! And an orphanβs thumb to first to crack the cask!
FancyShark
2021-12-23 20:56:15 +0000 UTCEgads, yes! I had forgotten the previous ones. Iβm going back and reading the absolute fukke out of them first chance I get. Thanks, Katie!
FancyShark
2021-12-23 20:53:29 +0000 UTCI loved this so hard, I read it 3 tiimes. I really need to stop praying with the Cancer Hag so I can finally finish.
Katherine
2021-12-23 19:55:31 +0000 UTCI haven't even read this yet, but the Pumblechook & Figg catalogue is ALL I wanted for Xmas. There are 2 more in the Cracked archives if there are any other Pumbleheads out there.
Katherine
2021-12-23 18:41:34 +0000 UTCThis article rules and woe betide the transgressor who dare speak otherwise, for adamantine-wristed wrath shall be the only rebuttal.
FancyShark
2021-12-23 16:35:48 +0000 UTCThe Curator of the present Catalogue has been proven errant in his proclamation from this prior Day of Mon, in which he did presage that such a work as this would elicit a dual disposition of happiness and fury. Yet nay! Only utmost delight is found herein, and not a jot of any reviled, hateful notion within view.* Good on ye, my bonny fellow. *Save, perhaps, for the enumerations on COVID which engendered me to classify, as the urchins of these times enjoy remarking, as "too real."
Skebotron
2021-12-23 15:22:53 +0000 UTCI'll take one of everything, good sir.
Vooster
2021-12-23 14:41:38 +0000 UTCSorry I reversed the charity's name. I'm used to thinking of it as Happy Hearts from before its merger.
Brendan McGinley
2021-12-23 14:35:14 +0000 UTCQuestion: will the Dominus Dongulator give one access to any of the upcoming Covid excitement, too?
CHAUGGLE
2021-12-23 14:22:55 +0000 UTChuh well could you maybe hook those boys up to a riding lawnmower what doesn't work anymore (we already took the mower deck off for clearance) cuz right now its pretty fun to ride but only down hill and I SURE WOULDNT need the tongueless option that is cruel and also maybe i could teach them some carols or so while they pull me and larene and trayton around
sissyneck
2021-12-23 13:51:00 +0000 UTC
