Chapter 12 of No Joy in Command is out for Squires!
Added 2025-03-23 22:41:46 +0000 UTCOh look. People are wildlin'! Stuff is happening. Plot, crack, murder, magic and stuff! (I warned y'all since the start!)
Do let me know what you think.
Previous chapters in the collection.
Comments
Fantastic chapter. Simply a marvellous read.
Rhett Sellers
2025-05-15 06:06:05 +0000 UTCJust discovered your fic on AO3 and was impressed enough to follow you here a d read all available chapters. BRAVA!
RalyDee
2025-03-28 14:59:21 +0000 UTCWhere’s this story?
SPJaymo117
2025-03-27 03:24:50 +0000 UTCJohn's meeting with Roddy "We Came to Die" Dustin and Cregan "That's How It's Done, Ned" Stark is what we really need. I'm pretty sure it would be a child's delight for John. Dudes are definitely legendary characters in the north
Folof312
2025-03-26 13:23:37 +0000 UTCOh I forgot thank you for the chapter. Great entertainment
sumanth jain
2025-03-26 13:16:17 +0000 UTCWaiting for one week is going to be tough , man
sumanth jain
2025-03-26 12:51:39 +0000 UTCFacts, this is hell.
Kurotanbo
2025-03-26 01:01:23 +0000 UTCThis is the story of Sigurd retold. By eating the heart Jon took the Cannibal's mana as his own. Jon's a Polynesian, Malay headhunter in this scene
Pearl of the Orient
2025-03-25 18:05:06 +0000 UTCDunno why but I half expected a red star burning through the sky when Jon started his cannibalistic ritual
Lotus92
2025-03-25 03:57:20 +0000 UTCAnd now I'm curious on what Jon's title will be... Devourer of Dragons? Cannibal Eater? and most likely the halve starved smallfolk will soon be well fed...
Jared Francis
2025-03-24 23:08:15 +0000 UTCit's been three days since the proclamation and Denys only just obtained Seasmoke so I wager it will be a few days before he tries to use his dragon to leverage Jon for his lands. but methinks Seasmoke will find something now unsettling about the Cannibal Eater and won't attack. I believe he reenacted Sigurd's actions for a reason. I imagine our dear Gladiusx intends to grant our hero some boons from such actions. perhaps longevity or immunity to fire?
Jared Francis
2025-03-24 23:06:37 +0000 UTCSigurd is the one who ate the dragons heart. "In Norse mythology, the hero Sigurd (also known as Siegfried) slays the dragon Fafnir and, after tasting the dragon's blood while cooking its heart, gains the ability to understand birds and learns of a betrayal plot, ultimately killing the dwarf Regin and claiming the dragon's treasure. "
prodbyluvlace
2025-03-24 22:08:12 +0000 UTCHopefully Jon brings back some dragon heart and blood for Rhaena to partake in. Their children will be the stuff of legends! They’d be the anti-Jaehaerys and Alysanne when it comes to their children :D Silver Denys keeps up his bragging about being descended from Maegor he’s not gonna live long as a dragon rider. As a smallfolk with no power it’s no big deal. But now you got a guy with a dragon talking about basically being royalty to the actual royals. I’m guessing no Hugh Hammer or Ulf as dragon riders, which is good. Alyn and Addam neither unless one of them flames Sheepstealer instead of Nettles.
Maniac000
2025-03-24 15:29:42 +0000 UTCFantástico como sempre.
Guylherme Rhuan
2025-03-24 14:52:47 +0000 UTCAlso great chapter but you are starting to steal my ideas before I can post a chapter to my asoiaf story haha. Although mine will be slightly different t and have Jon bathing in some dragon blood in Valyria
Ambrose Young
2025-03-24 14:04:27 +0000 UTCHave you never heard of the Ring of the Nebilungs? Siegfried of Xanten killed Fadnir the dragon on foot and bathed in its blood becoming almost impenetrable save for one spot that a leaf fell on before ge bathed! It's a germanic tale with Siegfried being an amnesiac Thor!
Ambrose Young
2025-03-24 14:03:27 +0000 UTCFirst, I believe that the chapter gave all of the reasons that led to Jon's decision to slay a dragon. I don't particularly care if they're stupid, as long as they're consistent with Jon's character so far. Second, I did say it's a crack fic, if taken seriously.
Gladiusx
2025-03-24 11:18:24 +0000 UTCThe worst part is now I have to wait for next week 😭
Bukhari
2025-03-24 07:33:42 +0000 UTC"Gondor calls for aid!"..... wait, wrong franchise. Jon has failed himself into having a small.... not army, but at least the beginning of a militia. Perhaps the Triarchy fleet will find not a poorly defended garrison but a sizable angry mob fanaticaly loyal to Jon and officered by Ser Alfred and the clawmen with draconic air support.
deinekes9
2025-03-24 06:53:25 +0000 UTCIs he also stupid now ? The ptsd + I’m going to kill a dragon on foot (when I can use vermithor)… dude first time I think it’s not you who wrote this.
khalid musadak
2025-03-24 06:24:37 +0000 UTCFor some reason I thought Cregan was born ~100 and not 108. Poor Cregan, widowed at fucking 20. That blows.
thevolunteer
2025-03-24 05:14:54 +0000 UTCWait so no Addam and Alyn , Silver Deny is the guy who claim he a descendant of Maegor right , bad feeling about that and he have some grudge with Jon , When our boy come back show up with Vermithor is best Rheana dear just claim Silverwing for god’s sake
VishihaHitachi
2025-03-24 05:06:45 +0000 UTCI agree that at some point Cregan’s going to decide that it doesn’t matter if Jon’s an imposter - though by my calculations, Jon is older than Cregan so it would be very bold to claim Jon as his son.
CillaVolkov
2025-03-24 05:03:01 +0000 UTCPlease please let Rhaena claim silverwing. After all the crap she’s gone through, I need this win for her 🙏🙏🙏
Yanni
2025-03-24 04:09:28 +0000 UTCI agree they might be concerned if they don’t see him for a few days, but for what seems to be a crowd of people to show up to a Lord’s manse? A village might send one person to ask questions if they were worried about the nice man, they don’t show up en mass.
thevolunteer
2025-03-24 03:59:12 +0000 UTCJust so good
Ryan
2025-03-24 03:57:11 +0000 UTCHahah 10/10 comment
Ryan
2025-03-24 03:52:26 +0000 UTCLmao true
Ryan
2025-03-24 03:50:51 +0000 UTCThere is also the possibility that they genuinely are concerned for him. After Rhaenyra raised taxes, the people suffered. Jon would feed people no questions asked.
stevem1
2025-03-24 03:39:01 +0000 UTCIt’s curious that so many people of Ashcove would be at Jon’s place. I wonder if Silver Denys claiming a dragon has him waving his newfound authority around and causing problems so the small folk were hoping for Lord Jon to help, only to find he’d gone out for a stroll. I could easily see Silver Denys planning on big dicking Jon with Seasmoke after Jon told him off last time, only for him to show up covered in dragons blood with a cape made from Cannibals wings.
thevolunteer
2025-03-24 03:08:31 +0000 UTC6 days till Sunday is gonna feel like a hundred years. ❤️
michelle m
2025-03-24 03:01:06 +0000 UTCI wonder at what point Jon’s actions win him enough renown that Cregan is like “No, no, man is definitely a Stark. Totally related to me. Actually, he’s my kid. Yeah I was 6 when he was born, so what?”
thevolunteer
2025-03-24 02:49:12 +0000 UTCBut will he find someone to plough his fat daughter is the key question?
Brewt
2025-03-24 01:43:49 +0000 UTCNice seeing Jon getting that 'magical instinct'! Some girls jump into pyres, but Jon prefers some boiling blood shower.
Luxanna Aeterna
2025-03-24 01:28:10 +0000 UTCDenys will be very smug about it! (and tell his tales of royal ancestry with even more vigor)
Luxanna Aeterna
2025-03-24 01:24:56 +0000 UTCThe last sentence of your author's note is pretty hilarious.
Eric Lachance
2025-03-24 01:21:18 +0000 UTCPeople come to the cannibal's cave only to see a blood-red figure sitting there. Jon looks up, the blood staining him red, making the whites of his eyes look particularly otherworldly, and says, "You mind, can I please eat in peace?"
Grimgoth
2025-03-24 01:14:46 +0000 UTCDragon Slayer...I love it! The not-so-subtle allusion to Siegfried/Sigurd...which, according to many historians, is probably based on the legend of the Cheruscan Arminius (Battle of the Teutoburg Forest/Varusschlacht). Incidentally, "Arminius's" real name is unknown, but his father's is recorded as Siegfried. The naming convention at the time suggests that he probably also had something related to "Sieg" as his name. The "tarnkape" (cloak) he uses in the Nibelungenlied is supposed to be a poetic euphemism for the fact that Arminius lived among the Romans for years. This is just a theory, of course, but I find it quite interesting. Lord of the Rings also has many overlaps with the Nibelungenlied (the Edda and the songs on which they are based). Curse the author for the cliffhanger...when will he get tired of it?...probably never. ;)
Grimgoth
2025-03-24 01:02:53 +0000 UTCJon half starving himself while killing Cannibal seems to have triggered a ‘cannibalistic’ hunger. He’s the Blood of the Dragon after all. And it is somewhat poetic that the Cannibal is himself cannibalized. Recollecting back to my memories of Celtic and Norse myths, bathing in dragon blood should imbue a certain level of invulnerability. Eating a dragon’s heart should allow him to speak with birds or wild creatures (I forget which). Rhaena, Ser Broome, and the villagers coming upon Jon soaked in blood with a dead dragon at his feet will only add to his legend. Jon Stark, Dragonslayer. The Greens and the Blacks will be desperate to get him onboard, and more than a little afraid of him. Otto on hearing the news. “Jon Stark killed a dragon single handed? A small one, right? No? The Cannibal? And he ate Cannibal after? And he’s bonded to Vermithor?” Otto rubbed his eyes. Fuck. Turning to his grandson - really would it have killed Alicent to pay more attention to the boy? - he sighed. “Your Grace, have you considered abdication?”
stevem1
2025-03-24 00:59:52 +0000 UTCbeing bathed in something can mean different things. it doesn't have mean taking a literal bath merely that he was coated in it. and given the description in the chapter of him being covered in the dragon's blood I would say it counts as being bathed in blood.
Jared Francis
2025-03-24 00:49:26 +0000 UTCThe whole of the Dragonmount starts to shake as Vermithor laughs his scaly butt off.
Chelley
2025-03-24 00:36:19 +0000 UTCJon for Dragonstone lordship, he actually gives a shit.
Kage_at_Fap
2025-03-24 00:35:29 +0000 UTCIt will be interesting to see the effects of eating dragon’s heart, drinking its blood and bathing in it. Can’t wait to see reactions to Jon flying to the castle on Vermithor with Cannibal’s head. Interesting that Silver Denys managed to tame a dragon this time. Originally he was killed by the Cannibal. When Nettles tames the Sheepstealer, Jon is going to have a nice entourage of dragon riders, especially that Rhaena is clearly going to bond with Silverwing
Myrdin
2025-03-24 00:15:35 +0000 UTCThis has gotten completely out of control. Love it.
Perraup
2025-03-24 00:09:21 +0000 UTCNice chapter. I am glad that the plot is picking up the pace. What kind of magic abilities will Jon receive from his slaying of the cannibal?
ShiroHige92
2025-03-24 00:07:31 +0000 UTCI worried this might be the case, but glad it isn't
Roguewave1737
2025-03-23 23:59:31 +0000 UTCI thought I was the only one! Except Sigurd didn't eat the heart raw, he roasted it, so... And he drank the blood, but didn't bathe in it... Maybe taking some inspiration, but not following the mythology?
Omar Syed
2025-03-23 23:49:46 +0000 UTCJon goes full Siegfried. Edit: also if Silver Denys has Seasmoke then possibly the Hull boys are never going to be noticed if they weren't picked up earlier.
Brewt
2025-03-23 23:47:03 +0000 UTCMan need to rename the sword balmung. So she's obviously going the small folk to chase after Jon. And when she sees him covered in blood at the corpse of cannibal she's gonna give the small folk a show when she shoves her tongue as far down Jon's throat as she can go
Bishop7053
2025-03-23 23:42:55 +0000 UTCNoice!!! In Western mythology, dragon blood, if it doesn't kill you, heals you and/or gives you wisdom. Dragon heart gives you super human abilities akin to a dragon's "strengths"(?) and the ability to speak to birds. Following this story, Jon drank the still living blood, ie still flowing, and literally bathed in it, so...immunity to dragon fire and/or other dragons able to smell that he is an apex predator maybe...🤔 Jon can already "speak" to birds, so...to other dragons maybe...🤔 Effin' cliffhanger though! Bloody writers and their hankering for the dramatic!
Omar Syed
2025-03-23 23:42:21 +0000 UTCCrowd of small folk: “let’s go slay Cannibal! Only a huge group of people even have a chance against the scaly beast!” Jon Stark: “Hold my mead”
Rick Malone
2025-03-23 23:35:42 +0000 UTCNo. Butt naked. Waded through dragonflesh. Full bath.
Gladiusx
2025-03-23 23:35:12 +0000 UTCEh… Jon inexplicably gaining white hair due to magic bs has happened in multiple fanfics
DraconianGreed
2025-03-23 23:33:02 +0000 UTCSo uh does he conveniently have a linden leaf stuck to his back too?
Jason
2025-03-23 23:32:32 +0000 UTCDunno where that came from, but no.
Gladiusx
2025-03-23 23:31:33 +0000 UTCSo… is Jon’s hair white now?
DraconianGreed
2025-03-23 23:23:17 +0000 UTCreally leaned on the legend of Sigurd eh? bathed in the dragon's blood, drank the dragon's blood and ate the dragon's heart
Jared Francis
2025-03-23 23:20:22 +0000 UTCHere lies Cannibal He was a lil bitch who killed and ate his own kin. Then came the good Ser Dragonwolf who killed him with a pencil and a bobby pin (size relative). Grey Ghost shared the name of Jon Stark’s pet at some point, and everyone knows you don’t fuck with Baba Yaga’s dog.
Nicholas Fiend
2025-03-23 23:02:46 +0000 UTCGreat chapter! Look forward to seeing the developments from here on out
SPJaymo117
2025-03-23 23:01:53 +0000 UTCIt can't end here, I demand more pages!
Kurotanbo
2025-03-23 23:01:38 +0000 UTCI love every chapter, but every Sunday, my love grows for this story, with this chapter being one is my absolute favorites. It's definitely earning that crackfic! feature for sure! How many dragons are left, there's Silverwing and Sheepstealer I think, whom else am I missing? Let's hope that the rest of the Targaryens aren't quick on the uptake as Rhaena is, once all the other dragons are claimed expect for supposedly Vermithor. Although Jon now has a pass on verbally claiming Vermithor, he definitely has very valid reasons to not want to have to side with the Blacks or the Greens! It'll be interesting to see how the residents of Dragonstone react to Jon's killing of the Cannibal, I think they would try to keep it on the down low, as they seem to have no love for Rhaenyra and her family (for valid reasons). Thanks for sharing, I've been really enjoying this story, and I'm looking forward to next Sunday's installment!
Aelila
2025-03-23 23:01:18 +0000 UTCayaya.... now we have to wait for week again ayayaya.... my heart cant go like this....XD
Pau khan sing Tombing
2025-03-23 22:58:58 +0000 UTCJon when under the gaze of nobility: Lmao, I don’t give a fuck about your opinions… politely Jon when losing his feathery friends: Imma end this bastards whole career Jon when under the gaze of his Scaly Boi: LET ME SOLO HIM
MehOhWell
2025-03-23 22:57:14 +0000 UTCOh I can imagine their faces when they reach the lair and find Jon eating
ModNsparksPhilo22
2025-03-23 22:54:49 +0000 UTCThanks for the chapter
Ulquiorra Schiffer
2025-03-23 22:50:22 +0000 UTC
