hi :) here's the link to a google drive with the high res digital wallpaper downloads. attached to the post are some screenshots showing a few of them on my phone. I did variations of mobile and desktop so you will have some options of each photo/piece – there are a few on there but I will add to it with more.
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/11...
2024-05-25 02:09:18 +0000 UTC View PostThe woman next to me on the train stares at her phone with thumbs frozen momentarily
She is thinking of how to word the message she’s typing
She scrolls up to look at the above messages quickly
As a guide
She types and then pauses again
Thumbs frozen again
She is just like me
I tried to cry slyly earlier in the ride because I didn’t want her to see
But I know she did
I wonder if she thinks I’m just like her...
hot off the scanner :)
new york botanical garden — shot on 35mm film
2024-05-21 02:47:21 +0000 UTC View PostYou asked if you could touch me
That first night
Just on my leg as we drove
Fully clothed and innocent still
You said it like I was something precious
That you didn’t want to break
I told you to be careful
You thought I meant with me
I meant with you
You didn’t listen
I didn’t either
We’re both really good at that
I told you that you’re a special person
You quietly agre...
Today I used the word ‘forever’ to speak about our future
I didn’t follow it up with any maybes or we’ll sees
It felt heavy in my mouth
Foreign
Like chewing on the other side
And maybe I’m the last to arrive here
Unfashionably late
And I just don’t fucking care
Lover girl fights to the death
Then resurrects herself
Lifts her bloodied face
Just to take another blow
The crowd goes silen...
I am in the shower bending my arms behind me
Reaching
Trying to wash my back
I think of you because I wish you were there to wash it for me
I guess maybe thinking of someone when you’re in the shower usually looks different than that
I think of you in that way too
When I listen to music
They aren’t lyrics anymore
I hear you talking to me
I hear me talking to you
The meaning of everything has been hijacked ...
I can’t stop crying and my plants are dying
That makes it sound like I’m unhappy but I’m not
I’m everything everywhere all at once
But I haven’t seen the movie so maybe I’m just lost
I once thought I knew which direction to go
But a cat in a tree got inside my mind and laughed at my certainty
Can’t shake this feeling that nothing is meant for me
But see that’s not even true
I can’t even write a poem with...
Total distrust in my own sight
Retire from knowing anything, I just might
Head on collision, fatal fated night
Fall from grace by shattered headlight
Certainly I must be certain concerning this uncertainty
Slow motion symphony
So breathtaking, so deadly
Crisis actors, my darling if only
Don’t attempt a glimpse
I promise you won’t like what you see
Fractured body and fractured mind alike
Bleeding out, all v...
I planned on just posting A Lack of Color today, but over the past couple weeks I’ve connected with a different song on the album. I knew the song, I liked the song, but I had never lived the song. It’s taken on a completely different sound and different life to me. When I was a teenager and connected to Death Cab I hadn’t yet experienced what I’ve experienced now, so it’s weird to listen with new ears and connect to new things even 20 years later.
What strikes me about...
I’m seeing Death Cab for Cutie live tonight for the first time. They are playing Transatlanticism in its entirety for its anniversary tour, and one of my very favorite songs by them is on that album.
This song has followed me throughout the years. Historically I’ve loved people who are sad, and I am sad. Not all the time but a lot. I’ve had challenging relationships. I’ve had to fight for love. The first verse has always given words to how I feel when I look at those I lo...
I look into my mothers eyes and I see myself
Fierceness resilience and devotion
I will inherit instead of wealth
I look into her mouth and I see an endless ocean
One that will drown you then perform CPR
Make you feel like you’re chosen
My inheritance is even larger than that still
Also on the table is violence
Innocence taken
Pain meant to kill
I look into her heart and I see a permanent tear
It gives h...
Most of the songs I’ve shared so far have been rock or alternative, and most coming into my life when I was young. This one is in some ways my favorite song of my adult life. I fell in love with electronic music as an older teenager, and it’s been my most listened to genre for a long time. There are endless styles and sub-genres and I’m all into that, I even started learning how to dj a few years ago. My tastes in this genre change a lot and I’m always discovering new things, but Rufu...
2024-05-02 02:44:13 +0000 UTC View Postjust wanted to say thank you guys for supporting me here and reading my shit and being a part of this. means a lot to me and I’m grateful.
endless vibes tier — my account got marked as ‘adult content’ (oopsie) so I’m not able to offer digital downloads in app because of that. so for the high res files I’m gonna do a google drive with those and post the link here for you every so often so thanks for your patience :) trying to get that going for you.
happy tuesday <...
2024-04-30 20:55:54 +0000 UTC View Post
bryant park, new york city — shot on 35mm film
2024-04-30 20:50:23 +0000 UTC View PostA user on threads replied with a voice note with this song in the background a few days ago, and it was once again a song integral to my life growing up finding me for the first time in a long time. Cake is from my hometown but I didn’t conceptualize that as a child, I just had this album poured into me over and over beginning at 5 years old, and I recommend the whole thing. I remember me and my sisters singing “stick shifts and safety belts, bucket seats have all got to go” from the ei...
2024-04-28 13:44:10 +0000 UTC View PostHe had 4 faces and I loved them all
It gave me a long way to fall
I’m starting to think life is just a sharpening
A tearing away
A revelation of searing reality and raw flesh underneath
We carry pain in our arms like school books
Our curriculum
This time I don’t think I’m a pleasure to have in class
Little girl, too fragile for this world
Too heavy to hold still
He showed me I was hard to love
Told me I was a drug
On good days I don...
When I pray, I pray for clarity
For guidance for protection
For eyes to see the hilarity
I ask for sight
For wisdom
For doors to be opened
And closed accordingly
I let myself cry out energetically
In search of becoming who I was born to be
I don’t pray very often
But when I do
I metaphorically fall on my knees
In awe of being here
I let myself feel the unexplainable ‘thank you...
Betrayed by the only thing I truly have
My body holds me but it hurts me too
My truest love and I have a toxic bond
Together forever but I don’t think we’re happy with each other anymore
My beloved makes me sick
Makes me convulse with pain
Makes me nauseous and dizzy
Makes me weak at the knees and faint
Not in the good way
My darling makes me sad
Makes me paranoid
Makes me afraid&nbs...
Chapped lips and intoxicated eyes
The day before I started to become aware of your lies
Slowly at first
Curiosity becomes thirst
In the delicate art of love and war
I’m painfully well versed
Giving me just enough
Specializing in calling your bluff
Did you really believe me
When I said I was tough
But it didn’t stop there
Kneeled before you like a depraved prayer
Closer and closer and closer if I dare <...
I was recently at a bar, not having a very good time tbh. I was tired and not feeling social and trying my best to carry on conversations when I felt completely flat. I could feel myself being unimpressive and out of it but I didn’t care. This song randomly came on the playlist at the bar and my ears perked up — I hadn’t heard it in a very very long time. It was a song my mom always listened to in the car when I was young — it immediately transported me back and I fell away from the c...
2024-04-20 22:18:34 +0000 UTC View PostColor in my face
Light in my eyes
Energy in my body
Love on my mind
Blankness on my face
Emptiness in my eyes
Numbness in my body
Death on my mind
Seduction on my face
Lust in my eyes
Fever in my body
Desire on my mind
Burning in my face
Disgust in my eyes
Nausea in my body
Rage on my mind
Contentment on my face
Hope in my eyes
