damianojeda

q&a

im going to make a q&a video and i need questions submitted. last time i said i was going to do this i never ended up doing it, but i'll probably go in the old posts and find some questions in there too. i'll actually do it this time

sadness - blue adorned like a deep april dream

this is going on the "old songs 2015" compilation. for some reason I can't find the original garageband files to see when I recorded this, but it was definitely sometime in april or maybe may of 2015. it's easily recognizable for me by just the way everything sounds, extremely potent springtime of 2015 feelings. this was actually 2 unfinished songs that I merged together from that exact same time (the 3 clean section is where the other song starts). I actually think I made 4 songs that day wi...

sadness - rana

the instrumental for this song (except for drums which I recorded sometime in 2021) (and also the extra synths) was recorded in 2016. (july 4 2016). the working title was "Rose". this predates "rose" that appeared on "rose lavender". I don't think I was that firm on this song being about "rose" or anything like that, but that's at least where the idea came from. I actually went through 2 other songs called "rose" before actually settling on the rose that you hear on rose lavender. the other "...

sadness - the most precious orange light, I hold it in my hands...

I lost this song when I erased my files. out of everything I lost I was most upset about this one. I was genuinely so excited about this song and i would listen to the draft all the time on my long walks at 4 am. when I deleted the session by accident all I had left was an mp3 bounce of the unfinished song, which had all the guitars, the synth, and midi drums. this was particularly annoying because now there was no way to change anything about the drums, such as adding fills, actually recordi...

sadness - ausente

the string intro I recorded january 12 2015. I had these huge plans for that song which never ended up being recorded, and this wouldn't even be for sadness. realizing later that I'm probably never going to make that song (I'll still use some of the really cool ideas) I still want this recording to be useful because I don't want things to go to waste and I've been trying to incorperate every unfinished recording I've ever made in a song somehow. I probably rrecorded half of the guitars in aug...

sadness - sunset girl

when I accidentally deleted my files early last year I deleted this song too. the only thing that was saved was an unfinished draft of the song (as I always keep works in progress in my google drive so I can listen to them). this is only an mp3 file so I can't really change anything about it. that very same mp3 file is what you hear here as far as all the guitars and drums. I recorded bass and vocals on top of this recently (late january I think?) normally I don't add midi drums to a song, ev...

sadness - falling in love with you

I technically finished this song a little while ago but for a while I thought I wanted to add clean singing at the end but I realized now that I don't actually want to do that. the clean guitar intro was actually recorded sometime in june 2014 (s little before I was making close) and i don't remember if I was intending it to be a part of close or some other album after close, but I never ended up making it past the clean guitar intro. at the time the working title was "girl". and then on apri...

sadness - don't go

I don't have the ext date I started making this, but I remember it being sometime in 2013, probably around august or september. this is going to be a part of "demo 2013" which, just like I was making for 2014 and 2015, is a bunch of songs I never fully finished from 2013. this is ages ago. all the songs on this album were actually supposed to be for my other project "a nightlit poesy" (don't look it up, pretty embarrassing). these songs are cool though, but if I had finished them in 2013 I wo...

sadness - 1008

I had this song ready at the end of january but didn't post it because I thought it probably wasn't ready. I mentioned in a lot of posts that I've been gone but now I"m back home. I'm moving very soon so I'm going to be busy with that and also finishing a lot of music projects. throughout the remainder of february and march I'm going to try and finish a lot of things and hopefully make many patreon posts.
this song is titled "1008" because of october 8th, which october 8th 2015 was when I...

talking wounded solitude

It might be necessary to read the post about “and longing are the endless waves” for some context. In it I talked about how these 3 albums (and longing, greyness of a young despondency, and wounded solitude) were officially released on bandcamp on the same day. I also talked about how the original recordings suffered from some unusually unlistenable production. In september 2019 I remastered this whole album and you can hear it on my youtube chanel. I was actually going to release it on s...

greyness of a young despondency

Greyness of a young despondency is the 5th album released for sadness, specifically because I wanted it to be the 5th one (read and longing are the endless waves backstory for more explanation). I probably could have released it sooner, but i ended up releasing it on march 6 2015, the same day as the 4th and 6th sadness albums. I don’t remember exactly when I made all the songs, but it was most likely in january, or february. MAYBE one or two I started in december but that is unlikely.the ...

talking and longing are the endless waves

This is the first sadness album where I actually made the cover. For a long time I used to just borrow images I would find on the internet that inspired me or somewhat matched what I imagined for the cover, so much more closely than anything I would ever have the capacity to make. The photo I took on some beach somewhere, likely wisconsin but could have been michigan. I’m pretty sure it was that one time in june 2013 I went to this lake in wisconsin. The photo is pretty heavily edited, even...

talking to despair of

I made to despair of basically around the same time as fading days away, so october and into early november 2014. Most likely all of it was during october (except for vocals), and I intentionally had the release date be in november, for the significance of the date. These songs feel very novemembr to me,. October is to november what fading days away is to to despair of. This album was never released digitally because I wanted at least something of mine to shine in the beautiful way that music...

talking fading days away

after i released close and noticed such a positive response that i was not expecting at all, i felt inspired to continue making music under the name sadness. i made close july 2014, and august 2014 i moved houses. this new house opened something good for my music because the owners left their drum set there so obviously i was going to use it all the time. as you can hear on the older sadness recordings the drums sound very crudely recorded. when i started recording music i used a rock band mi...

talking about close

while i have no way of working on music (since i've been traveling) i'm going to talk about songs of mine and give lyrics + backstory. ive been traveling since the beginning of january and haven't made any posts on here, for which i apologize. i'm getting around to this now because i'm going to be taking a long train ride through europe. before i left i had finished a sadness song from the 2015 compilation but didn't post it cause i didn't know if it was really ready to be shared yet but i ju...

update

ive been traveling since the beginning of 2022 and haven't had any time to record or work on anything. i'll return for the month of march but i'll be busy moving (again). this is why i haven't made many posts recently, but while i can at least talk about things or post lyrics i will try to do that. plenty of music pending as always once i get the chance to continue it

life - centuries turn

if you know my discography really well you'll recognize this song. originally recorded in summer of 2015 but a long time ago I had the idea of rerecording it, and only got around to doing it just now. the differences between this version and the original are that (like I mentioned in a recent post) this was recorded with the drums first and then everything else, specifically so I didn't have to use a click track, because I think recording to a click is lame. this came with problems when I rea...

life - traveling waters

this is a rerecording of the first song I wrote for life in early 2017 (if you don't count malãë which was revisited from 2015). for many years I had the idea of rerecording this song because when I was teaching my band at the time in 2018 and I realized that I liked how the song sounded much better in this faster tempo and higher tuning. it wouldn't be until last week that I actually got around to doing it finally. since this song was already "written", I was able to record the drums first...

life - subject

this song concludes "coma garden", the new life album I've been posting songs about. this is the track that I finished in october but wanted a certain guest vocal appearance. it's finally done as of today, december 18. my girlfriend sings with me at the very end. I wrote all the guitar parts for this song and drum parts in january of 2019, when I had a full band for life and was writing new songs for us to play. I was not going through a good time at all when I was writing this. it wouldn't b...

life - 17 memory

this song is going to be on "demo five". I made the first half of the instrumental (only guitars) on may 20th 2020, and probably april 2021 I continued the rest of the song. I always had the name "17 memory", because the guitars at the beginning and the guitar tone made me feel a very specific color and sensation that reminds me of feeling it when I was 17. the lyrics are describe that abstract feeling and a specific abstract memory from when I was 17. I could say a lot more about this song b...

sadness - quiero olvidar

if you don't know already, I'm in the process of compiling old music from 2015 and releasing it as an album. some of these songs were already finished back then, but most of them were not. these songs have been left incomplete until 2021. by incomplete it could mean that I never recorded vocals or wrote lyrics, or it could mean that I only had half of the song recorded until now, or it could mean that I still needed bass, or drums, or both. in the case of this song, everything up until aroudn...

sadness - short hair heartthrobbing

this song is also part of the 2015 songs compilation (refer to previous posts for more context). in the summer of 2015 I remember watching a specific music video for a song, and not the actual plot of the video or anything, but rather little details that I hyperfixate would inspire this entire song. then I started recording the song on july 6 2015. a few months later I started having the idea for a new music project which was basically going to be... "atmospheric nu metal?" I had 2 songs plan...

sadness - summer angel gathering

this song is also part of the Old songs 2015 compilation (refer to previous posts about more context). this song was instrumentally finished in 2015, and for the purposes of this old songs compilation I finished the vocals and bass yesterday (the quiet ending was also recorded this morning). I started this song on june 22 2015. at the time I had the idea of making a combination of black metal and pop punk, and this is what came about. the lyrics were built off of another facebook thought diar...

sadness - paseábamos por el río

some of you might know already, but I will repeat: there's a lot of unused music from 2015, and some songs from that time never officially released beyond maybe a youtube video (which for violating TOS were taken down). I decided a while ago I wanted to release a compilation of these 2015 songs, finish the ones that were left incomplete. (I'm also doing this for 2014 songs and 2013 songs). this "old songs 2015" compilation has 16 songs, and include several songs already posted here on patreon...

burning gardens

where do I begin with this one.. this song is on fire. this song is me being on fire. i started it in summer of 2015 (august 4th apparently). the title was immedeately "burning gardens" without having lyrics or any specific idea in my head, I'm not sure where exactly it came from, but something about combining the beauty of burning and beautify of garden flowers seemed interesting to me I suppose. I was inspired by the band "indian summer" who would sample old lo-fi blues recordings underneat...

life - coma garden

after this song there's just one left to finish and it's the one I mentioned I want to have a certain guest vocal appearance, should be done soon. this song just like the rest of the album was "written" ages ago, in particular january 8 2019, writing new songs for "life" when I had a full band. I recorded myself playing this song on the guitar just for reference and didn't actually officially record the song until just now. aside from the guitar riffs I had an idea in my head of how I wanted ...

life - I am encircled by spring flowers

this is another song I wrote in late 2018 (november) when I got a band together to play life. there's a video of us rehearsing it but the bassist ruined the video. everything down to the lyrics were written at this time, even the way I imagined the vocals being performed. I had everything planned out back then but wouldn't actually record the song for another 3 years.

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im encircled by spring flowers and the sky is chiming
i am burning
i want to hold t...

life - blue as your wounds

in late 2018 I moved to a new city and tried forming a band to play life. this worked out great for a little while, everyone was learning the old songs, and I even started writing new material for us to work on and ultimately play/record. then that entire band fell apart because of personal drama (my fault lol). anyway those "new" songs I kept in my memory and knew that one day I wanted to actually seriously record them for life. it took me 3 years but here I am. the last song I posted "I wan...

eye of prima

where do I begin with this one. circle of veins takes similar feelings as what I mentioned in my previous post about Life, spring 2017. I made circle of veins in spring of 2017, and particularly spring 2017 had it's own essence in my personal life. none of these songs are atually "sad", none of them have even a little bit of negativity, if anything just wistful longing, but the colors are vibrant and beautiful , hopeful even. eye of prima started as just the guitars with no title or anything,...

pathwalk

I don't think I ever said this was my best song, but anyway.

life started in march of 2017,when one day I recorded (at least the guitars) traveling waters, HSTTH, and pathwalk. I had always been a huge fan of 90s hardcore, but more specifically emocore. emotive hardcore. when I was a little kid I was an all out emo kid and would listen to all kind of emo music, even as far back as when I was 9 I remember listening to music like the red jumpsuit aparatus. of course no one would really ca...